Live - Laugh - Love

Internal Movitavtion

2010-12-29T13:52:00.000-06:00

Alma 60:23

"...Now I would that ye should remember that God has said that the inward vessel shall be cleansed first, and then shall the outer vessel be cleansed also."

This is such a true principle that is so hard for me to adhere to. My inward vessel, my heart and my inward maturity, is what I must focus on cleansing before I can hope to cleanse or purify the rest of my being. I can't expect my outward actions and deeds to be truly Christlike until my true intentions are what drive those Christlike actions as opposed to simply "knowing what I should be doing, and doing that despite my instincts desiring otherwise." I believe that is what Christ means when he says that he will look upon my heart, upon judgment. He will look at the true desires of my heart. When that day comes, will he find charity there? Will he find good intentions but a lack of true desire? A wise man once noticed that the path to Hell is paved with good intentions. It is very important to remember that good intentions are not enough to truly become a good person, it is the intentions married to the desires that produce a truly good person.

In my studies of psychology I have come to understand that there are two classifications of people (at least there is one way of classifying people that leads to a dichotomy): Internally motivated and externally motivated. I am currently externally motivated. I can only bring myself to accomplish things that are outside of my comfort zone if there is an externally motivating force, like my wife or my family or some reward. I desire, above all/most, to become an internally motivated person. I started telling myself this (again) last night while I was driving and covenanted with myself right there and then that I will never drive above the posted speed limit (knowingly) again. Why? Because that is the law and I strive to be a law-abiding citizen, because that is what Christ would be if he were experiencing mortality right now (so long as the law did not conflict with eternal principles such as how to properly observe the sabbath day).

Basically, I need to figure out who I am, who I want to be, and then combine the two. Finally, I need to stick to the desires of my heart as they become more like Christ's desires.

A Child's Demeanor

2010-12-29T01:52:00.000-06:00

Alma 59:13

"And it came to pass that Moroni was angry with the government, because of their indifference concerning the freedom of their country."

As I think about little children and their varying demeanors, it makes so much sense that our demeanor carries over from the premortal life to this one. I have nieces of all ages that demonstrate every type of personality, despite their similar circumstances in how they are raised and all other sorts of variables that could possibly be used to explain such behavior. This is yet one more piece to the puzzle of building my testimony of the way that things truly are, the plan that I believe the Lord has set forth for us to follow towards salvation and exaltation.

Because of when I was born, and the era in which I was born, as well as other more personal things, I know that I was valiant and a stalwart supporter of Christ and his plan for us. I hope that I can be just as faithful and righteous in this mortal body and henceforth.

The Force

2010-12-27T02:36:00.000-06:00

Alma 58:37

"But, behold, it mattereth not - we trust God will deliver us, notwithstanding the weakness of our armies, yea, and deliver us out of the hands of our enemies."

I love the example that the Nephites are (well, at this point in the time line at least) in terms of demonstrating faith in the power of God. Facing nearly insurmountable odds, they still believe that if they possess enough faith and act on that faith and inspiration, that the Lord will provide a means for them to be successful in battle. Oddly enough, this sounds very similar to that of the battle between the Dark and Light sides of the force. OK, I admit, Abigail and I just finished watching the first three episodes of Star Wars over the past 4 days, but it does not seem to be too much of a stretch. As the Jedi trust in their teaching and in their code - which calls for putting others first, trusting their intuition and inward feelings to guide them, and never questioning the direction of those who have come before them - they will be strengthened and they will overcome the trial at hand. However, the dark side of the force relies on fear, anger, and hatred to fuel their power. They believe that they can become so powerful in their own right that there is nothing that can stand in their way.

Satan likes to tempt us into thinking that we can accomplish great and powerful things through reliance on our own abilities and that things that "get in our way" are obstacles that must be done away with, with no thought or regard to anybody but ourselves. God, on the alternative, tells us that putting others first in thought and deed is the true source of power. Christ was the perfect example of this, living out his mortality in the service and supplication of all those he interacted with, right down to his words on the cross of "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."

O Holy Night

2010-12-26T01:38:00.000-06:00

Alma 57:21

"Yea, and they did obey and observe to perform every word of command with exactness; yea, and even according to their faith it was done unto them; and I did remember the words which they said unto me that their mothers had taught them."

I had a wonderful Christmas this past day, full of wonderful time spent mainly at my parents' house, with the day beginning in Hamilton. It is always wonderful to see so much family around me at one time and to enjoy a huge Christmas feast followed by family games. The gifts that Abigail and I received were truly inspired. The Christmas songbook will bring us much joy musically. The biography of the prophet Thomas S. Monson is a much anticipated read as he is a wonderful man and such an inspirational servant of God. The money we received which helped Abigail get a new (and working) phone and myself some important software which will help me with my thesis and with research at the graduate school level. We were also given other gifts that are much appreciated and will be cherished as they contribute to our happiness and spiritual growth.

But none of these gifts compare to the gift that God gave us 2000+ years ago. His son, our Lord and savior. Whom without we would be forever lost and bound by the eternal justice that sin brings upon us. Thank you, Father. Christ's birth truly was a holy night. And I will be forever, eternally, grateful.

Merry Charitable

2010-12-24T23:59:00.000-06:00

Alma 56:47

"Now they never had fought, yet they did not fear death; and they did think more upon the liberty of their fathers than they did upon their lives; yea, they had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them."

To me, that is true maturity. The ability and desire to think of others first at all times and in all things. What is the best way to over come my own bad attitude? To do something selflessly for another person. What is the best way to feel the spirit? To serve in whatever capacity I am able to. What is the true love of Christ? Charity. Unselfish, putting-others-first charity. I say this again because it is the season. That is what Christmas is all about. Christ was the truest and best example of charity, and in order to receive His image on my countenance, that is what I must become, charitable. To be mature and to grow into who my Father wants me to be, I must first become charitable. That is the driving force behind tithing, behind the law of consecration, behind fast offerings, behind the bishop's storehouse, and so forth. What is the best and quickest way to build up Zion? Charity. Please Lord, help me be charitable in all of my thoughts and actions. My life means nothing if the only person I do good things for, the only person I ever think of, the person who occupies the majority of my life is me.

Poker

2010-12-24T01:02:00.000-06:00

Alma 55:31

"But behold, the Nephites were not slow to remember the Lord their God in this their time of affliction. They could not be taken in their snares; yea, they would not partake of their wine..."

Satan loves making me feel hopeless and helpless. But I love the saying that 'when you don't feel like praying, that is when you most need to pray.' In times of affliction, when it feels the world is against me and I feel like there is nothing I can do, Satan wants nothing more than to make me feel abandoned. But so long as I remember that God is always ready and willing to listen to my pleas and the desires of my heart, there is nothing that Satan can do that I cannot overcome. I hold all of the trump cards and Satan can only hope to bluff me out of my chips. There are times that I believe his lies, more often than I would like to admit. But I know that if I remember that all he can do is bluff, there is no reason I should ever let him beat me.

The Cause of Our God

2010-12-23T14:16:00.000-06:00

Alma 54:10

"...and we will maintain our religion and the cause of our God."

As I truly understand that I am a Son of God first and foremost, then life comes into focus and has a clearer perspective. Choices that I should make, choices that I should not make, habits that will uphold the values that I stand for, and so forth. Every day, I stand poised to either maintain the cause of our God, or to work against it by my example and the choices I make. The greatest disservice that I can do for my fellow man is to do things that don't exemplify what a true Christian would do, and the greatest service that I can give to anyone is to do as Christ would do in all opportunities that I have.

True At All Times

2010-12-22T01:18:00.000-06:00

Alma 53:20

"And they were all young men, and they were exceedingly valiant for courage, and also for strength and activity; but behold, this was not all - they were men who were true at all times in whatsoever things they were entrusted."

I love that last line - "they were men who were true at all times in whatsoever things they were entrusted." I often wonder what type of man I would be if that were able to be said about me. To be true at all times means so much more than just never telling lies. It means always living up to your personal standards, never taking the easy road, never giving up when you have committed to something, and so forth. It means having an inward force that drives you to be who you want to be and never altering that course. And there are so many things that we are entrusted with in this life. We are trusted with our families, that we will be the best son/brother/father/daughter/sister/mother that we can be. We are trusted with our church callings, that we will stand where we are and lift in building up the kingdom of God here on the earth. We are trusted with our bodies, that we will treat them with respect and understand their sacred nature and great potential. We are trusted with so much in this life, that to be true to all things therein is an incredibly difficult task. But God would not ask these things of us, He would not entrust us with so many great and wonderful things if He did not think that we could manage it all and be true to it all, if He was not prepared and willing to help us whenever we feel that we need His help.

That's where true strength lies, understanding that with the help of our Father, and with the resolution to be true in all situations and to all things, there is nothing we cannot accomplish in this life.

My Own Four Walls

2010-12-21T00:14:00.000-06:00

Alma 52:25

"And thus they did, and slew all those who had been left to protect the city, yea, all those who would not yield up their weapons of war."

As Christmas approaches, I feel so thankful for my family and all of those who love me. I look forward to these next three weeks in which I get to spend time with family and friends without the interruptions of work and school. Abby and I may not spend another Christmas/New Year in Texas for a while to come, so we are making the most of it. The prophets have advised that the most important work a priesthood holder can do is within his own family and home. Building relationships and understanding true, not temporary, happiness is key to developing spirituality and godly power.

Sufficient Strength

2010-12-20T01:42:00.000-06:00

Alma 51:9 & 16

9 "But behold, this was a critical time for such contentions to be among the people of Nephi...

16 For it was his first care to put an end to such contentions and dissensions among the people; for behold, this had been hitherto a cause of all their destruction."

There is such a wonderful lesson to be learned from chapter 51, typically known as one of the "war chapters" in the Book of Mormon. Moroni is up against a tricky situation in which the Lamanites are about to attack their city while at the same time a number of his own people are dissenting because they do not feel like the city is being run according to their desires politically and therefore will not help Moroni defend the city. As verse 9 states, this was an awful time for there to be contentions among his people because it meant that they might not be sufficiently strong to fight off the Lamanites.

So what? What does this have to do with me and with my spiritual development as I learn and grow more than 2000 years after this event? It means that I need to make sure that my personal life is in order, spiritually as well as in all other ways, to ensure that when Satan comes tempting me, because he will, that I will have all of my faculties about me, and that I will be sufficiently strong to resist and stay clean and pure.

I can think back to times in my life where I have been living my life mostly righteously, but then right before the Lord needed me to serve him I succumbed to a temptation that drove the spirit away and made me unworthy to perform the Lord's work. If I am going to be able to be where the Lord needs me, when He needs me, and able to perform the labor that He has for me, I need to make sure that I am sufficiently strong. I am my own worst enemy when I let my guard down and when I fail to live up to who I really am.

Happiness

2010-12-18T22:17:00.001-06:00

Alma 50:23

"But behold there never was a happier time among the people of Nephi, since the days of Nephi, than in the days of Moroni, yea, even at this time, in the twenty and first year of the reign of the judges."

When I view that statement that there never was a happier time, it makes me reflect about what exactly has led to that being able to be said. As I understand from the preceding chapters, Moroni had gained the trust of his people because he was ensuring their safety and protection as well as providing a good example for them to follow by trusting in the Lord. Truly, living life in such a manner that pleases the Lord will ensure my personal happiness and will ensure that I am always able to smile and to keep my head up. These are not maybes, these are promises and sureties.

People today often get happiness mixed up with satisfaction. It is satisfying to see the newest blockbuster movie that has just come out. It is satisfying to drive 100mph down the freeway. It is satisfying to view pornography and lie, steal, and cheat. But this satisfaction goes away just as quickly as it arrived, and sometimes faster - leaving nothing behind but wasted time, regret, and sorrow (to varying degrees depending on what it is). What I need to focus on is the good, better, best principle. There are good ways to spend my time, there are better ways to spend it, and there are the best ways I can spend it. As I have previously reminded myself, we are accountable for our time spent here on earth. How wonderful would it be to be able to look the Savior in the eyes during my judgment and be able to say that I spent my time on earth doing things that were the best options available to me. That would surely be a very, very happy moment.

Preparation

2010-12-18T01:47:00.000-06:00

Alma 49:5

"Now at this time the chief captains of the Lamanites were astonished exceedingly, because of the wisdom of the Nephites in preparing their places of security."

I enjoy the war-chapters of the Book of Mormon because they are so easily applied to our spiritual struggles and battles that we face today. The Nephites were incredibly successful in this first battle with the Lamanites (first one since Amalickiah had obtained the Lamanite throne) because they were very well prepared. They took their weakest cities, and converted them into fortresses. They spared no cost in ensuring that it would be impossible for the Lamanites to take control of those cities and slaughter the inhabitants. In so doing, the Lamanites lost more than a thousand warriors whilst the Nephites did not lose one soul.

Should we not do the same today? Should we not be preparing our spirits and our spiritual strength as much as we possibly can so that when Satan comes with his forces to tempt us and tries to lead us toward spiritual death, we will be prepared and ready for his onslaughts? Is this not a better method of combating the adversary than simply saying "OK Satan, take your best shot. I'm not very well prepared, but I know that I am strong." Would it not be much better to tell him that you are both strong AND well-prepared for his wiles?

Daily scripture study, prayer, acts of charity, paying tithing, actively building up Zion, attending the temple, and so forth. These are the methods of spiritual preparation that the Lord has set forth. There is no better day-to-day activity that we can participate in other than those which better prepare us for the times when things won't be so easy, peaceful, and calm.

Captain Moroni

2010-12-17T00:44:00.000-06:00

Alma 48:17

"Yea, verily, verily I say unto you, if all men had been, and were, and ever would be, like unto Moroni, behold, the very powers of hell would have been shaken forever; yea, the devil would never have power over the hearts of the children of men."

I hope that one day, those same words can be written about me. I'm a bit behind the curve at the moment, I must say, but this life is not a sprint... it is a journey. A very wise man was once asked the question, "how do you become perfect?" In response he said "you get a little bit better each day, and you have a lot of days." I hope that I can manage to become even just a little bit better each day. There are things that I need to work on in my personal, internal, life. There are things about who I am deep down inside and I understand how those things affect the way that I view the world, view myself, view others, as well as their effect on the choices that I make and the choices that I inspire others to or to not make.

My Loved Ones

2010-12-16T01:54:00.001-06:00

Alma 47:36

"Now these dissenters, having the same instruction and the same information of the Nephites, yea, having been instructed in the same knowledge of the Lord, nevertheless, it is strange to relate, not long after their dissensions they became more hardened and impenitent, and more wild, wicked and ferocious than the Lamanites - drinking in with the traditions of the Lamanites; giving way to indolence, and all manner of lasciviousness; yea, entirely forgetting the Lord their God."

As I think about the future, I am so thankful for the blessings that the Lord has given me. My wife, my family, my friends. I know that no matter what lies in store for me, they will be there for me to support me and to see me through the hard times (as well as the occasional good times :) ).

Perspective

2010-12-15T01:16:00.000-06:00

Alma 46:12

"And it came to pass that he rent his coat; and he took a piece thereof, and wrote upon it - In memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children - and he fastened it upon the end of a pole."

My thoughts lately have been dominated by those of perspective. Not only obtaining the "correct" perspective on things, but mainly on maintaining it. There are a plethora of things that I have done in my life that I otherwise would not have if I had been successful at maintaining the perspective that I know to be true. So many things happen throughout the course of an hour, a day, a week, that occupy your brain power that unless your life-perspective truly become a part of who you are so that you don't have to struggle to remember it and consciously apply it to every choice you make, then life will become a series of ups and downs, successes and failures.

At least I have taken a step in the right direction and have finally rid myself of the grievous trap called apathy.

Study Habits

2010-12-14T04:22:00.000-06:00

Alma 45:17

"And now, when Alma had said these words he blessed the church, yea, all those who should stand fast in the faith from that time henceforth."

I love the fact that the Lord cares about my gaining knowledge here upon the earth and that He will bless my efforts in school if I will but keep His commandments (thinking specifically about keeping the Sabbath day holy). I have yet to study any topic related to school since being married, and so far throughout the four semesters of classes I have taken, I have earned a 4.0. Hopefully that will continue as I have two very difficult finals to take tomorrow, one of which I feel very unprepared for. I am thankful for the principle of faith, for I have full faith in the Lord's ability to bring things to my remembrance that I need, when I need it most - so long as I have taken the time to put the information into my brain.

True Power

2010-12-12T23:05:00.000-06:00

Alma 44:4

"Now ye see that this is the true faith of god; yes, ye see that God will support, and keep, and preserve us, so long as we are faithful unto him, and unto our faith, and our religion; and never will the Lord suffer that we shall be destroyed except we should fall into transgression and deny our faith."

I love the knowledge that the only person who can defeat me is myself. Satan has now power over me if I do not give him the time and place to destroy me. I need to do a better job of keeping my life so pure and clean that any attempt of Satan's to blemish my spirit is instantly noticable. Being strong in the face of temptation is a wonderful thing, but how much more wonderful would it be to keep my life so pure that even temptation is a rare thing. I believe that was part of Christ's strength while he was upon the earth. He lived such a pure life that it was difficult for Satan to even find methods of tempting Christ that might reasonably have a chance of succeeding. That's partly what it means to become like Christ, to become more than just this personage of flesh and bone that walks the earth. To truly view myself as a son of God, Christ's brother, an heir to eternal glory and kingdoms. With that knowledge, and the knowledge of what God wants me to do and how God wants me to act, what chance does Satan have? Therein lies true power and true self-mastery.

Wordless Example

2010-12-11T23:12:00.000-06:00

Alma 43:45

"Nevertheless, the Nephites were inspired by a better cause, for they were not fighting for monarchy nor power but they were fighting for their homes and their liberties, their wives and their children, and their all, yea, for their rites of worship and their church."

I often marvel at just how many forms the sin of pride can take. I have recently been pondering on how I should interact with people from the stand point of who I am and what I represent, as well as the understanding that everything I do and say is an example of sorts, whether I intend for it to be or not (and this is the same for everybody). For example, when someone does something that I find rude or untimely, should I react in such a manner that reprimands them for what they did and makes them feel bad in an effort to get them to not do it again? Or would it be more Christ-like of me to simply wait for the interaction to end, and respond in a more light-hearted and jovial manner? I suppose it depends on the circumstance, but what I am getting at is an issue of pride.

Who am I to be the one who "teaches" everyone how they should react and respond to everything positive and negative that comes their way? I should simply just react the way that suits me, righteously, at that moment and let my "reacting" do the teaching, if they care to observe and learn. I should not feel as though it is my place to tell someone how they should do things or to point out people's flaws every time I see something that seems awry. I suppose that doing so every now and then, when it seems as though it is really important, would still be reasonable... but my first reaction to everything I see around me shouldn't be to "fix and teach," rather it should be to "love and show by wordless-example." I think that is the key there, wordless-example. Don't tell someone that you are teaching them, or showing them the proper way to react. If you do something or react in a manner that catches someone by surprise, they will notice and they will remember. If someone is around you long enough, and they see the way you act and react often enough, they will either do the same (if your reaction is the proper way to react) or they won't.

I should live my life as a "wordless example." I like that.

Mercy and Justice

2010-12-10T21:16:00.000-06:00

Alma 42:16-25 (I realize this is long, but there is no point at which it could be ended early and still capture the entire essence of its message. This is my favorite chapter of all scripture, so I refuse to cut anything out.)

16 "Now, repentance could not come unto men except there were a punishment, which also was eternal as the life of the soul should be, affixed opposite to the plan of happiness, which was as eternal also as the life of the soul.

17 Now, how could a man repent except he should sin? How could he sin if there was no law? How could there be a law save there was a punishment?

18 Now, there was a punishment affixed, and a just law given, which brought remorse of conscience unto man.

19 Now, if there was no law given - if a man murdered he should die - would he be afraid he would die if he should murder?

20 And also, if there was no law given against sin men would not be afraid to sin.

21 And if there was no law given, if men sinned what could justice do, or mercy either, for they would have no claim upon the creature?

22 But there is a law given, and a punishment affixed, and a repentance granted; which repentance mercy claimeth; otherwise, justice claimeth the creature and executeth the law, and the law inflicteth the punishment; if not so, the words of justice would be destroyed, and God would cease to be God.

23 But God ceaseth not to be God, and mercy claimeth the penitent, and mercy cometh because of the atonement; and the atonement bringeth to pass the resurrection of the dead; and the resurrection of the dead bringeth back men into the presence of God; and thus they are restored into his presence, to be judged according to their works, according to the law and justice.

24 For behold, justice exerciseth all his demands, and also mercy claimeth all which is her own; and thus, none but the truly penitent are saved.

25 What, do ye suppose that mercy can rob justice? I say unto you Nay; not one whit. If so, God would cease to be God."

As I mentioned above, this is my favorite passage of scripture. Why? Because it paints such a wonderful picture of the way things should be, and the way they truly are. God truly loves me, and because of this he has laid forth a plan to accept back into his fold as many of his children as will come back to him. He is ever-loving, ever-forgiving, ever-merciful, yet ever-just. He wants me to come back to him, yet he cannot give me something that I do not deserve. I say deserve hesitantly, for it is impossible for me to be exalted with out his help. No unclean thing can dwell with God, but God has promised his kingdom to me if I do what God has asked me to do, and because of that promise (which not even God can break), I deserve (in a manner of speaking) to dwell with him if I keep my end of the bargain.

My thoughts are all over the place right now when I think about what it takes to please God the most. I recently watched a movie about the prophet Joseph Smith, and when it ended I felt the Spirit so strongly, I was so moved. I suppose that is what it means to please God, to do what He wants you to do. Joseph Smith was a man of faith, and because of that he dared not to do what the Lord commanded him not to do, and he did what the Lord commanded him to do. There is no reason to question the Lord, because the Lord knows best, in all things and at all times. Being obedient truly is the best way that we can please God.

He has asked me to live his commandments, to read the words of the living prophets, to read the words of the prophets from past dispensations, to search the words of Isaiah, to have charity towards all men, and other things as well. None of these are menial tasks, none of these aren't worth the time and effort. All of them build character and promote love and harmony. Is it too much to listen to what the Lord asks of us to do? Am I so prideful that I think I know what is a better use of my daily-time than the Lord does?

There is a law given and a punishment affixed. The law is that I obey his commands. Both the punishments and the rewards are lying in wait for me. Can I ask the Lord to let mercy rob justice? I need to live my life in such a way that the Lord is able to welcome me home, with open arms.

Verse 27: "Therefore, O my son, whosoever will come may come and partake of the waters of life freely..."

True Meaning of Restoration

2010-12-09T19:19:00.001-06:00

Alma 41: 10,12&15.

10 "Do not suppose, because it has been spoken concerning restoration, that ye shall be restored from sin to happiness. Behold, I say unto you, wickedness never was happiness.

12 And now behold, is the meaning of the word restoration to take a thing of a natural state and place it in an unnatural state, or to place it in a state opposite to its nature?

13 O, my son, this is not the case; but the meaning of the word restoration is to bring back again evil for evil, or carnal for carnal, or devilish for devilish - good for that which is good; righteous for that which is righteous; just for that which is just; merciful for that which is merciful.

14 Therefore, my son, see that you are merciful unto your brethren; deal justly, judge righteously, and do good continually; and if ye do all these things then shall ye receive your reward; yea, ye shall have mercy restored unto you again; ye shall have justice restored unto you again; ye shall have a righteous judgment restored unto you again; and ye shall have good rewarded unto you again.

15 For that which we do send out shall return unto you again, and be restored; therefore, the word restoration more fully condemneth the sinner, and justifieth him not at all."

I love this passage of scripture. It hits home in all the right ways. I love the plan that God has set forth in terms of how we should conduct our lives. When Christ comes again, and after this earth-life is finished, we shall be resurrected and all things will be restored to their proper state. Truly this restoration speaks concerning our hearts as well. Our purpose in this life is to go through the refiner's fire and to show Christ and God who we really are. To think that our hearts, the driving force behind our thoughts, choices, and actions, will change simply because Christ has come is a wonderful lie that Satan has spread among mankind. If this were the case, then I would ask what the purpose of this life is? We are not able to take any material possessions with us after we die, so what is it that we gain from this existence if we achieve a never-ending state of happiness and bliss regardless of what we do or who we become while we are mortal?

Should we not make every effort to ensure that everything we do is out of love? of charity? of improvement? If we do, then the results are made clear. Those things which we do unto others will be reciprocated, or restored, unto us in the Lord's due time.

I look forward to the time when I can stand before my Lord, give an accounting of my choices made on earth and hear his loving words, "well done, thou good and faithful servant." I pray that I will have the strength and focus-of-perspective to continue to make choices that lead me to that wonderful and joyous interaction. I pray that when my actions and thoughts are restored unto me, that I will be able to smile and look my loved ones in the eyes with my head held high.

Mysteries

2010-12-08T19:03:00.000-06:00

Alma 40:3&5

"...nevertheless, there are many mysteries which are kept, that no one knoweth them save God himself."

"...it mattereth not; for God knoweth all these things; and it sufficeth me to know that this is the case."

This chapter of Alma is packed with wonderful doctrine about the state of spirits after we die and before the resurrection, but I think that this snippet of the third and fifth verses is just as profound if not moreso. Many people often get caught up in trying to know everything there is to know such as: Where precisely is Kolob? How old is the earth? and other questions of that nature. What Alma is saying here is that, while he does reveal the answer to such a wonderful mystery in chapter 40, there are other mysteries about the true nature of things that man does not know, but God does.

For a long time throughout the history of this world, there were even more mysteries that had not been revealed until recent times. Mysteries that Alma, Nephi, Moses, and other prophets possibly did not fully understand (though, we do not know what the Lord revealed to them with the understanding that they would keep it sacred and private). As the world needed answers and as His church grew, those answers were given through revelation to prophets (Amos 3:7). Thankfully the Lord continues to give revelation to his followers (Hebrews 13:8) so that we can have the fullness of the gospel and that we can understand those things which we need to understand.

This brings me back to my original thought, that we understand only that which we need to understand. We do not need to understand precisely how old the earth is in order to receive salvation and exaltation, so why should we worry about it? The Lord has revealed unto man that which He has chosen to reveal, and we should be satisfied with that. I personally am thankful for that which He has revealed unto us throughout the course of time, and especially over the past 180 years. My faith has made me happier than I could have ever imagined, and I pray that I can prevent myself from worrying about trivial matters that have no bearing on my current existence. I understand that God does know all things, that that is sufficient for me.

Examples

2010-12-07T20:23:00.002-06:00

Alma 39:1&11

"...for behold, have ye not observed the steadiness of thy brother, his faithfulness, and his diligence in keeping the commandments of God? Behold, has he not set a good example for thee?"

"...Behold, O my son, how great iniquity ye brought upon the Zoramites; for when they saw your conduct they would not believe in my words."

As I read this chapter, it really puts the daily activities of life into perspective. Our Father has told us that we are accountable for the way in which we use our time in this life. Are we using that time to build up the kingdom of God? Or are we falling into the trap of apathy toward the impact our actions have on those we come into contact with?

There are two things in this chapter that jump out at me, which is why I selected portions from two verses. The first is that Alma rebuked Corianton for not seeing the example that his brother was setting for him in terms of how one should live. What impresses me about this statement from Alma is that he is essentially declaring that our actions set an example for those around us. If we are constantly surrounded by people who behave and act in a certain way, then we are influenced by the choices that our peers are making, for good or for bad. Whether or not our peers are intending to be an example unto us, they are.

Alma further drives the point home when he turns the conversation directly towards Corianton's actions amongst the Zoramites. Corianton represented something grander than himself during his ministry to the Zoramites, but as a result of his choices, the Zoramites were not able to believe in what was being taught because they were witnessing a contradiction to those teachings. Truly, actions do speak louder than words.

I often reflect upon my interactions with people and wonder if I truly am "practicing what I preach." I often wonder what example I am setting for those around me, realizing that whether I intend to or not, my actions do influence those who witness them, and whether they intend to be influenced by my actions or not, they are. Every interaction I have with those around me changes me and it changes them. That is such an awesome thought.

Am I doing my best to build up the kingdom of God in everything that I do and say? Am I living my life in such a way that I can tell my Father and my Savior that I used my time well while I had the opportunity to do so? Is my conscious at peace when I reflect upon the manner in which I interact with those whom I love as well as those with whom I simply coexist? Am I becoming who I want to be? Am I developing habits that I want to pass onto my children? If my children were to emulate my behaviors and choices, would I be proud of that or would I instruct them to "do as I say and not as I do?"

Motivation

2009-04-13T23:36:00.002-05:00

Alma 38:12

"Use boldness, but not overbearance; and also see that ye bridle all your passions, that ye may be filled with love; see that ye refrain from idleness."

There is something to be said for having motivation in life, for having a purpose, for having a reason to be more than you would otherwise be. It is different for different people, and there is nothing wrong with that, because everyone is different. I believe that I have finally found mine. It struck me today, and it honestly changed my outlook on my day and the reasons I was doing what I was doing, no matter what it was that I found myself doing. It's like my perspective on life has suddenly changed, for the better. I need this in my life, I have needed it for a long time. Happiness has taken on a whole new meaning for me, and I look forward to this happiness growing even more, for I know that it undoubtedly will.

Oh Happy Day!

2009-04-12T23:21:00.003-05:00

Alma 37:6-7

"Now ye may suppose that this is foolishness in me; but behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise.

And the Lord God doth work by means to bring about his great and eternal purposes; and by very small means the Lord doth confound the wise and bringeth about the salvation of many souls."

Oh what a wonderful weekend. Abigail's parents and friends are absolutely wonderful people. I thoroughly enjoyed meeting them and getting to know them. Even though I did not get much time to get to know them, it was enjoyable nonetheless. I foresee many more chess matches between her father and I! I am so glad that her family loves musicals and the such just as much as I do. Music is such a big part of my life, and it is comforting to find out that Abby was raised to love music just as much as I do (if not more!). Going to her home branch was also a great experience. The people she grew up with are such wonderful people. I instantly felt welcome. In fact, I had a crazy experience there. We had a missionary by the name of Elder Christianson in our singles ward for about 5-6 months, and he transferred out not 2 weeks ago. Well who would you guess was there in the chapel playing the piano when we arrived? The very same elder that I had come to know and love! It was simply awesome!

I look forward to future plans. This really is getting me excited. The Lord certainly does have a greater plan for his children than we realize most of the time. I believe his plan for me is beginning to pan out and reach fruition.

Hamilton

2009-04-11T23:39:00.003-05:00

Alma 36:19-21

"And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more.
And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!
Yea, I say unto you, my son, that there could be nothing so exquisite and so bitter as were my pains. Yea, and again I say unto you, my son, that on the other hand, there can be nothing so exquisite and sweet as was my joy."

That is a great summation, in my opinion, of how wonderful the power of the atonement and the amazing healing power of repentance are. The pain of sin, and sorrow, which we have all felt are terrible. However, once we repent and are forgiven, and recognize that forgiveness in our lives, we can have an equal amount of joy in our lives due to that act of faith. For repentance truly is an act of faith. If we didn't believe that repenting would do anything for us, we wouldn't humble ourselves down to our knees and ask for forgiveness.

That is how the Lord works, by rewarding us based on our demonstrations of faith. Faith is not simply hope in great and good things, it is recognizing what we should have hope in, and then going out and getting it. And upon accomplishing that thing which we set out to do (whether it be asking for forgiveness, following a prompting of the spirit we may have felt, etc), giving thanks unto God for helping you to have the faith to carry out that which he has desired you to do.

My goodness I love the plan of salvation. It really does deserve it's pseudonym of the plan of happiness.

Parental Hope

2009-04-10T23:52:00.003-05:00

Alma 35:6

"And it came to pass that after they ahd found out the minds of all the people, those who were in favor of the words which had been spoken by Alma and his brethren were cast out of the land; and they were many; and they came over also into the land of Jershon."

I trust that the Lord is taking care of my parents right now. They love Him so much, their hearts are in the right place, as they have been for a long time now. I look forward with anticipation to the aftermath.

269

2009-04-09T23:36:00.002-05:00

Alma 34:32-34

"For behold, this life is the time for men to prepare to meet God yea, behold the day of this life is the day for men to perform their labors.
And now, as I said unto you before, as ye have had so many witnesses, therefore, I beseech of you that ye do not procrastinate the day of your repentance until the end; for after this day of life, which is given us to prepare for eternity, behold, if we do not improve our time while in this life, then cometh the night of darkness wherein there can be no labor performed.
Ye cannot say, when ye are brought to that awful crisis, that I will repent, that I will return to my God. Nay, ye cannot say this; for that same spirit which doth possess your bodies at the time that ye go out of this life, that same spirit will have power to possess your body in the eternal world."

I think that scripture is quite often mistaken. Or rather not so much mistaken as that I believe it applies to a principle that gets over looked quite often, one that in my opinion could help people find a source of strength far greater than they would otherwise attain. From my experience when people read that scripture they mostly think that it is not meet that people should wait until they are on their deathbed to begin their repentance process. But if that is all they perceive from this, they are missing a very valuable nugget of wisdom.

If this scripture were a discussion on when to, or not to, begin the repentance process it would not talk about "the time that ye go out of this life." That is because the repentance process is just that, a process. It does not happen over night, and therefore cannot be attained on one's "death bed."

What I believe this scripture discusses is a person's view on the way they live their life, not the way they view their death. Repentance is an every day thing, it is a refiner's fire, it should become an attribute of ours just as much as mercy, love, happiness, sadness, and the whole array of emotions. A repentant attitude is a humble attitude, it keeps one's pride in check because if we are prideful then we will think and feel as though we have nothing to repent of, no one to answer to, and we will possibly get a "holier than thou" syndrome when it comes to interacting with other people. Especially other people whom we KNOW are "sinners." (Which leads me to another thought, are not we all sinners?)

The underlying principle that I gather from this discourse is that of enduring. Of enduring through the trials of our day. Our respective days in fact, because enduring is necessary no matter the struggle. If we successfully endure, with a repentant attitude, there will be no need to hope for a "death bed repentance" of sorts because we will have performed our righteous labors in the time given to us to do so. The spirit that is mentioned at the end of that passage is that of either a lethargic one (one that does not take the business of repentance seriously) or that of a devout and God-Respecting one. I pray each day that my spirit within will eek out of my body and overflow into my actions and my words. That my person will carry out the desires of my heart, the desires of my spirit. And I have faith that in doing so, I will carry the image of Christ on my countenance, and that the spirit which doth possess my body in the eternal world is one of love, charity, and faith.

Eight to Nine

2009-04-09T00:12:00.002-05:00

Alma 33:8

"Yea, thou art merciful unto thy children when they cry unto thee, to be heard of thee and not of men, and thou wilt hear them."

Ugh, tonight was not a night I want to repeat at work. Apparently Wednesdays can get CRAZY. Anyways... I'm making the best of this situation, work is awesome. I love it.

I am completely looking forward to this weekend, it is going to be amazing. I really have never been happier than I am right now, this is an awesome feeling. It's new but it's not new. The feeling itself isn't new, but the intensity and the luminescence of it is new, and I look forward to it getting even stronger and brighter and better. But, I work early in the morning, so tonight I bid adieu.

Personal Trees

2009-04-07T23:56:00.002-05:00

Alma 31:38

"But if ye neglect the tree, and take no thought for its nourishment, behold it will not get any root; and when the heat of the sun cometh and scorcheth it, because it hath no root it withers away, and ye pluck it up and cast it out."

I am finding out more and more how true that scripture is. We must not neglect our testimonies, especially in the early stages. We may have all the belief and hope in the world, but if we simply go on hope and desire, and do not back it with faith it is all for naught when the winds of oppression blow our way. Faith is not simply hoping. Faith is putting your hope and desire into action. Things such as daily feasting on the scriptures, learning to love the living prophets, not only attending church but being attentive and desiring to be spiritually fed. This gospel is more than just a passive spectator sport, it is a living, breathing, exciting thing that we need to take part in.

Those simple steps have been what has brought me back to the church and kept me there. Once I understood what it took to be a member of the church as opposed to simply being listed as "baptized once upon a time," that's when I started noticing changes within my heart. For if my heart had not been changed, had the seed not taken root, I would have been an example of what Alma was talking about in this scripture. For truly the sun has attempted to scorch my testimony over the past short while, and if I did not understand who I am and why it was important for me to have the standards, morals, and beliefs that I do have - I surely would have caved in to temptation and would be much a lesser person because of it.

Ever Onward

2009-04-06T23:29:00.003-05:00

Alma 31:38

"And the Lord provided for them that they should hunger not, neither should they thirst; yea, and he also gave them strength, that they should suffer no manner of afflictions, save it were swallowed up in the joy of Christ. Now this was according to the prayer of Alma; and this because he prayed in faith."

So, it is time to go back to school. I have put this off far too long. For numerous reasons, I feel that (since BYU is no longer in the cards) UNT is where I should be. They apparently have a decent psychology program, and I am already familiar with the school and I really enjoyed the one semester I spent there. Now the only question left is housing, I need to sit down and look at the finances, but for the sake of flexibility and less driving time, I'm leaning towards dorms.. ugh.

I don't look forward to the prospect of paying for school, especially when I've been so caught up in saving for a possible mission. However, I'm sure that the Lord will take care of me because I know that education is also an eternal principle and so long as I am pursuing righteous endeavors faithfully, the Lord will bless me with his spirit and guide my path.

I love the way the Lord puts people into your life at certain times, He certainly knows what He's doing.

Conferece: Temples!

2009-04-05T22:04:00.002-05:00

Alma 30:44

"But Alma said unto him: Thou hast had signs enough; Will ye tempt your God? Will ye say, Show unto me a sign, when ye have the testimony of all these thy brethren, and also all the holy prophets? The scriptures are laid before thee, yea, and all things denote there is a God; yea, even the earth, and all things that are upon the face of it, yea, and its motion, yea, and also all the planets which move in their regular form do witness that there is a Supreme Creator."

The final 2 sessions of Conference today were sublime. The morning session was, in my recollection, the greatest single session of conference that we've had in recent years. Uchtdorf's, Holland's and Monson's talks were all amazing, and the fact that they were all in the same session simply made the entire 2 hour session so powerful. It was the most fun I've ever had watching conference as well as I was surrounded by people that I love dearly. My mother was there, Abigail, Anthony, Chris and Jake all were there with me as we listened intently to the messages of the leaders of our church.

I am so glad that I have found a love for the living prophets, their words truly are the modern revelation that leads and guides this church, and keeps us safe in these turbulent times. These truly are the days prophesied of in the scriptures, the last days, the final dispensation of the fulness of times, the time to prepare the earth for Christ's second coming. I cannot think of a better man to lead Christ's church at this point in time than President Thomas S. Monson. I don't know what it is about him, but when he speaks I can't help but perk up and pay intent attention. I look forward to heeding the counsel that was repeated talk after talk today - that of increased temple attendance. I plan to couple that with finding a temple preparation class so that I can receive even more blessings from the temple through the holy and sacred ordinances that take place inside.

My life definitely is on the up and up, things seem to be working out for the better. The Lord certainly has a sense of humor with the way he has directed my life, but I certainly am not going to start complaining; He knows what's best.

Conference and Denton

2009-04-05T03:43:00.002-05:00

Alma 29:3-4

"But behold, I am a man, and do sin in my wish; for I ought to be content with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto me.

I ought not to harrow up in my desires, the firm decree of a just God, for I know that he granteth unto men according to their desire, whether it be unto death or unto life; yea, I know that he allotteth unto men, yea, decreeth unto them decrees which are unalterable, according to their wills, whether they be unto salvation or unto destruction."

Wow, what a day! Conference was amazing. I am excited about Neil L. Anderson being called the the apostleship. He is such a wonderful and humble man. This is the first time that I have ever taken notes during conference, and it is certainly something that I plan to repeat time after time. It has helped me remember the messages that they have shared with us and the guidance they are giving us for this day and age. I love listening to the prophet and apostles. The institute class I have been taking for the last few months has certainly helped me appreciate these wonderful men and all that they have to offer. I look forward to conference on Sunday and in having fun with my friends and family. It is looking to be a wonderful day, I'm very very anxious and excited!

ILU

2009-04-03T23:37:00.002-05:00

Alma 28:13-14

"And thus we see how great the inequality of man is because of sin and transgression, and the power of the devil, which comes by the cunning plans which he hath devised to ensnare the hearts of men.

And thus we see the great call of diligence of men to labor in the vineyards of the Lord..."

I am so excited about conference tomorrow. Craig has agreed to come over and watch it with me. I really do hope that he feels the spirit. It would mean the world to me, to see such a wonderful man take one step closer to accepting Christ's true doctrine. I'm sad though that the baptism that was scheduled to take place inbetween conference sessions got cancelled (due to family scheduling conflicts), that most certainly would have been a great spiritual experience for him to have the opportunity of attending.

Oh how I need the Lord's guidance in my life right now. I have so many important decisions to make in my life. I feel like I should be at one place in my life, and I find myself in another. That is mostly due to dumb choices on my part over the last few years of my life, years in which I did not let the Lord guide me. I pray that in these next upcoming months and years, that I can attune myself with the spirit and manage to let myself be led by my Father. For if I do that, I can not err. It will take some humbling, but I have faith that I can do it.

Intrigued

2009-04-03T01:03:00.003-05:00

Alma 27:27

"And they were among the people of Nephi, and also numbered among the people who were of the church of God. And they were also distinguished for their zeal towards God, and also towards men; for they were perfectly honest and upright in all things; and they were firm in the faith of Christ, even unto the end."

Well, this has certainly been quite the last ~24 hours. I'm very happy that things have turned out the way they have, for numerous reasons. I look forward to seeing how this develops, and also in seeing how I react to various situations that may (more like will) arise from this. I look forward to continuing to be the strong person that I have become, and by doing so I trust that I will become even stronger. The Lord will strengthen me as I keep him close to me, and I must realize that is paramount.

That reminds me of a thought I had a while back that I think I blogged about. But I am prompted to repeat it. One of the easiest ways to give the church a bad name is by breaking serious commandments around our peers (or anyone, really). By doing so, we make them question what members of our church really believe. It makes them start to ask themselves questions like: "Oh, those mormons say this and that, but they don't actually believe it. They're all talk and no walk. They must not take their relgion very seriously." Could you imagine the guilt you would feel if you knew that your actions caused a friend of yours to reject the gospel based on your bad example? I would tear myself apart!

On the flip side, one of the best ways to communicate the standards of the church to our peers is by not only believing in the truthfulness of the church, but by demonstrating it in our every day lives. By rejecting the offer to drink, or smoke, or tell raunchy jokes (or even entertain them), or by rejecting anything that our generation commonly finds acceptable, that is certainly not in concordance with the teachings of Christ's true church. Whether we like it or not, every member of the church is an ambassador for the church. We might just be the only member of the church that our friends know, and the entire means by which they have to gain (or lose) a desire to learn more about the church.

We must become like he whom we claim to follow: Christ.

lol

2009-04-02T00:17:00.002-05:00

Alma 26:12

"Yea, I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; therefore I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things; yea, behold, many mighty miracles we have wrought in this land, for which we will praise his name forever."

What beautiful words. God truly is the real source of strength in life. Man certainly is strong, but add the Lord's strength to that, and there is literally nothing that is impossible to accomplish in life. Add that to the mix of following the Lord's will for your life, and it makes a sure foundation for the exaltation of any one caught up in the wonderful world of charity and righteousness.

I'm looking forward to going to sleep tonight with a smile on my face.

The Yellow Brick Road

2009-03-31T23:38:00.002-05:00

Alma 25:16

"Now they did not suppose that salvation came by the law of Moses; but the law of Moses did serve to strengthen their faith in Christ; and thus they did retain a hope through faith, unto eternal salvation, relying upon the spirit of prophecy, which spake of those things to come."

It seems the more one tries to control their own life temporally, the more the Lord reminds you that your ways are not always His ways. And that His ways for one person are rarely His ways for you. That just because one person's life plays out in a certain way, or that most people's lives seem to play out in a certain way, does not mean that your life will or even necessarily should play out in that same way. I suppose the best way to look at it is with faith and trust. By understanding that so long as you keep the most important things in life first, that everything else will fall into place for the best.

So long as you keep things in perspective and listen to the Lord's opinion above the opinion of your peers (or even yourself some times), that the Celestial Kingdom awaits you. After all, it doesn't really matter what temporal status we attain in this life, so long as our heart and our disposition are in the right place, the Lord will take care of you. It certainly takes humility to put that faith into action. Humility to place the "common sense" of how life "should" work out behind the unknown in which the Lord leads you through. It reminds me of a scripture referenece by President Boyd K. Packer, in a recent General Conference talk he gave, which reads:

"And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith." (Ether 12:6)

The analogy that he gave was along the lines of being willing to walk your life into the darkness of the unknown a few steps. And after you do that, the Lord will turn the light on and light your path. If we show the Lord that we trust in his guidance, he will take care of us, walk beside us, carry us, whatever it is that he needs to do to guide us towards the Kingdom in which we truly desire. For the Lord desires that we all return to dwell with our Father in Heaven. However, if we do not truly desire to be there, it will be impossible to get there. No amount of wealth or no particular job or life-situation, or church calling... will get us to the Celestial Kingdom. It's all about what's inside of our hearts and whom we become. Obviously if we become a faithful disciple of Christ, we will be willing to let him direct our lives in whichever path that may take us.

Home

2009-03-31T02:48:00.002-05:00

Well, I made it home. To sum it up, it was a WONDERFUL vacation. The value of such a trip is immeasureable. I do believe that it has changed me somewhat, and I do believe it is a change for the better. As I collect my thoughts more on this subject, I assume that will be the subject of most of my blogs-to-come.

It's good to be home. I look forward to continuing on with my life and in further developing the gifts that God has blessed me with and in continuing to pave my path towards the Celestial Kingdom. For that path truly is paved with your own sweat, thoughts, desires, prayers, and such. The works we do are simpy testaments of our spirit.

Hong Kong!

2009-03-16T17:55:00.002-05:00

Well, after 26 hours of driving, and a 15 hour flight, I made it to Hong Kong! The time is now 6:55am...

There is only a limited amount of time we are "supposed" to use the free internet zone here, so this will be it for now. Expanded posts to follow!

blah

2009-03-15T20:50:00.000-05:00

well, im blogging from the burbank airport... From my phone. Why you might ask? Details to follow!

Spring Break...

2009-03-14T12:02:00.003-05:00

Alma 9:27-28

"And behold, he cmeth to redeem those who will be baptized unto repentance, through faith on his name.

Therefore, prepare ye the way of the Lord, for the time is at hand that all men shall reap a reward of their works, according to that which they have been - if they have been righteous they shall reap the salvation of their souls, according to the power and deliverance of Jesus Christ; and if they have been evil they shall reap the damnation of their souls, according to the power and captivation of the devil."

So, it's rare that events happen in my life before noon that are blog-worthy. And it's even rarer that I find myself needing to blog about them around noon for the reason that I won't be able to access a computer near the close of the day. But, today is such a day.

I was awoken this morning by my father telling me that we needed to go to the airport that moment, because I had to airport-list myself in person and that for some reason it could not be done via computer. So, I threw on sandals, my coat, and we took off. I got to the kiosk and attempted to list myself, when it told me that I needed to wait for someone to come assist me. Well that was certainly odd. When I finally got someone to help, they took me over to another computer and put my information in. Sure enough they gave me my faux boarding pass, but they told me that I needed to contact the government about something.. I later found out that he meant the TSA (Transportation Security Administration).

Why did my Dad wake me up at 7:30am and rush me to the airport? Because apparently EVERYONE AND THEIR DOGS (seriously, I saw a dog at the airport..) are trying to get to Los Angeles this weekend. Something about it being spring break, and that airport happens to be the main trans-pacific airport.. oh and LA has beaches and what not for vacationing. Yeah.. we thought ahead REAL well on this one.. Well, we didn't make the flight, and upon checking other flights, non-reving to Los Angeles today or tomorrow doesn't look like it's going to happen.. at all. Why do we need to get to LA by Sunday night? Oh, just because our PAID tickets have us on a flight leaving LA at 11pm Sunday evening to Hong Kong. Really don't wanna miss that one.

So now we've realized the only way we're going to make it there is by purchasing $600 tickets each.. or going on a 21ish hour long road trip. After a brief, but careful, comparison of the respective prices of transportation given the immediacy of the trip, the Road Trip won. So I now am staring at a day-long drive with my dad to LA. And I'm running on 4 hours of sleep... NAP TIME. Then I'm off!

Back to the TSA thing.. I got home and looked up how to contact them about this frustrating occurrence, and apparently I can't call them. They are only reachable by email, and nothing comes back quicker than 30 days. So I'll just take care of this when I get back. But what is it one might ask?

If you are not able to print a boarding pass from an airline ticketing kiosk or from the Internet as a result of some type of action taken by Homeland Security; or you are denied or consistently delayed boarding; or a ticket agent called someone before handing you a boarding pass, please visit the Travel Redress Inquiry Program (DHS TRIP) website.

Woot! I'm on the terrorist most wanted list! Maybe I should look into going to school in the Middle East. I hear Bin Laden's regime pays for your schooling if you sign up for a year or so. And those that have inside information on the United States get extra benefits!

Food For Thought

2009-03-13T22:57:00.001-05:00

Alma 8:15

"Blessed art thou, Alma; therefore, lift up thy head and rejoice, for thou hast great cause to rejoice; for thou has been faithful in keeping the commandments of God from the time which thou receivedst they first message from him."

Well, today was my last day at work until April 1st. It was nice to get to spend some time with Jordan and Beth after work, hanging out, laughing, eating, and just having a nice time of it. Had my plans still included moving to Utah, tonight would have been VERY different, emotionally, and all ways otherwise. I really do appreciate the friends I have, and the support group they have been to me for the last few months. I am going to miss them dearly for the next 2 weeks. I can only hope they will miss me as much. I do try to be a good friend, but what does that really mean?

The way in which I try to be a good friend to one person really doesn't differ from the ways in which I try to act towards all mankind. When I meet someone, I generally do so in the same smiling, coridal manner. So why is it that certain people seem to draw closer to me than others? I suppose that if all people reacted the same way to me I would either befriend everyone that I met, or I would not have any friends whatsoever. What draws two people close in a kinship or friendship relationship versus what doesn't create that bond puzzles me whenever I ponder on it. Is it pride on one or both sides? Is it a matching spirit? Is it a natural disinclination to trust? Is it physical attraction? There are so many different things that go into a first impression. Yet I honestly think that I carry myself the same way around everyone that I interact with. I'm not sure there is an answer.. but it's good food for thought!

Modern Day Blessings

2009-03-12T23:49:00.002-05:00

I chose three verses tonight because the first two go so well together, and the third one just happened to speak about my blog last night, so I thought I'd throw that one in there as well!

Alma 7:7 & 9 & 21

"For behold, I say unto you there be many things to come; and behold, there is one thing which is of more importance than they all - for behold, the time is not far distant that the Redeemer liveth and cometh among his people."

"But behold, the Spirit hath said this much unto me, saying: Cry unto this people, saying - Repent ye, and prepare the way of the Lord, and walk in his paths, which are straight; for behold, the kingdom of heaven is at hand, and the Son of God cometh upon the face of the earth."

"And he doth not dwell in unholy temples; neither can filthiness or anything which is unclean be received into the kingdom of God; therefore I say unto you the time shall come, yea, and it shall be at the last day, that he who is filthy shall remain in his filthiness."

It often amazes me how truly blessed I am. And that's not to say that I deserve all that I am blessed with, I simply live a life that is truly one that is a choice life to lead. I have a wonderful job, a car, a computer, access to the internet constantly, an abundance of clothing, a home to live in, the ability to travel by airplane across the world, a television, an Xbox, a cell phone, an iPod, furniture that is stable, access to any book that I want, a piano to play on, plenty of food to eat, a temple nearby, plenty of fellow church members in my area, the fact that I live in the United States of America, and so much more.

Now, obviously I left out a few very important ones, but the ones I chose to mention were for a reason. How many of those blessings that I just listed to I NEED in order to obtain the Celestial Kingdom. The simple answer is none of them. Not one thing on that list would I consider a necessity. The only ones that come close are the nearby temple and the fact that I live amongst a large gathering of saints. But really, I don't NEED those either. I could live in an obscure part of the nation (or heck, the world) and not have many saints around me, and I could have to travel for hours or days to visit a temple - but that wouldn't make me any less able to obtain the Celestial Kingdom in the life to come, their proximity is simply a blessing.

I think of all the good I could do if I led a simplistic, minimalistic life. How much time in the day do I let myself waste by passing the time doing things that are simply not necessary for obtaining salvation? What ways could I convert my relative affluence into helping the less fortunate? If selling my computer meant that I could provide a life-time of shelter for another of God's children that didn't otherwise have a roof over their heads, I would do it in a moment's notice. At least I like to say that I would. I hope that I would. How many of those blessings that I enjoy did the saints in the early church enjoy? Are they any less qualified for the kingdom than I?

Yes, affluence and technology make life easier, but is that necessarily a good thing? To an undisciplined person, ease of access and ever-improving technology only serves to turn them into slothful and lazy servants. But does that mean that all technology is a bad thing? No. Because those who are disciplined are able to use those advancements in the world for the betterment of those around them and for the betterment of themselves. They are the ones that understand what a blessing modern-technology and affluence are, and they constantly view them through spiritual eyes; in turn they maximize the use of such things for the spreading of the gospel and for the betterment of others.

It makes me wonder if I really need all that I have. And if not, what do I currently own that is simply a distraction from the things that I should be doing, and what things do I own that I am using for my personal progress spiritually as well as the progress of those around me?

Home and Body

2009-03-11T23:54:00.002-05:00

Alma 6:5-6

"Now I would that ye should understand that the word of God was liberal unto all, that none were deprived of the privilege of assembling themselves together to hear the word of God.

Nevertheless the children of God were commanded that they should gather themselves together oft, and join in fasting and mighty prayer in behalf of the welfare of the souls of those who knew not God."

One thing that has been on my mind lately is how I should be living my every-day life. What types of things should I be doing when it comes to the things that most people would deem inconsequential to the overall path of one's life? Well, two things have presented themselves to my mind in a union that I'd never thought about before as being connected. Those 2 things are the need to be inner-driven, and the requirement to live according to the Celestial Law.

If we desire to live in the Celestial Kingdom, shouldn't we be attempting to live our lives currently as though we were there right now? What do we imagine that place will be like? Will there be things scattered across the floor? Dirty laundry thrown everywhere? Do you imagine the Celestial Kingdom goes undusted and un polished? When I think of the Celestial Kingdom, I imagine a wonderfully beautiful place that is clean, organized, and holy. Shouldn't we pattern our own lives after that?

Picture the temple. It is always immaculately clean, and whenever you go there, for any reason, you can't help but marvel at the beauty and the holiness that is felt there. Well, in reality, there are 2 other "places" on this earth that are just as sacred and holy to the Lord as the temples are. Those 2 things are our homes and our bodies.

We need to strive to keep our homes as unspotted from the world as possible. Our home is where our family dwells, and where we rear our young ones, where our family congregates, where we do the majority of our worshipping and growing, it's where we develop. Should we not treat it as though it were a literal temple of the Lord? Could you imagine the Lord walking into your home or *gasp* your room? If he did so what would your reaction be? Would you ask him to wait outside for a few minutes whilst you tidied up and made the place look clean? If a stranger were to walk into your home, would they feel something special and sacred upon doing so? Or would it feel the same as if they had simply walked into any other building?

The same goes for our bodies. The Lord cannot dwell in any unclean place - that includes US. We must be vigilant about maintaining the holiness of our bodies. Chastity, morality, unhealthy diets, narcotics, and so forth - these are things that easily qualify us for the fleeting of the spirit from us. And not only until our bodies are made clean again can he reside within us. How terrible a feeling would that be to not have the Lord with you at all times? I know the feeling, it is awful and it simply makes you feel worthless. But oh the joy and comfort of knowing that you have kept your body unspotted from the world (there's that phrase again), of knowing that the Holy Spirit resides within you because you are worthy and clean enough for him to do so.

I need to do a better job of those things, and the only way to accomplish those things is to have an inner desire to do so. Those are not things that the world as a whole will support you on, will agree with, or will even understand. That is the reason that it is only able to be accomplished and maintained through a desire that comes from within, and a testimony of such sanctity to match your desire.

Mysterious Ways

2009-03-10T23:04:00.002-05:00

Alma 5:14-19

"And now behold, I ask of you, my brethren of the church, have ye spiritually been born of God? Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts?

Do ye exercise faith in the redemption of him who created you? Do you look forward with an eye of faith, and view this mortal body rasied in immortality, and this corruption raised in incorruption, to stand before God to be judged according to the deeds which have been done in the mortal body?

I say unto you, can you imagine to yourselves that ye hear the voice of the Lord, saying unto you, in that day: come unto me ye blessed, for behold, your works have been the works of righteousness upon the face of the earth?

Or do ye imagine to yourselves that ye can lie unto the Lord in that day, and say - Lord, our works have been righteous works upon the face of the earth - and that he will save you?

Or otherwise, can ye imagine yourselves brought before the tribunal of God with your souls filled with guilt and remorse, having a remembrance of all your guild, yea, a perfect remembrance of all your wickedness, yea, a remembrance that ye have set at defiance the commandments of God?

I say unto you, can ye look up to God at that day with a pure heart and clean hands? I say unto you, can you look up, having the image of God engraven upon your countenances?"

It's interesting how the Lord works. I have firm faith that when he closes one door, he invariably opens another - or more. I checked my BYU-application status tonight when I got home from hanging out with Meagan, Beth, Jordan, Savannah, and Travis at Chili's after work. I have checked it at least once a day for the last week now.. and tonight I finally saw a message other than "completed." The message that was in it's place was simply:

Denied

I.. was shocked. A feeling came over me that I had not experienced in quite some time. But as my thoughts turned away from the sorrow that I would not be attending BYU, and on to life here in Grapevine, an overwhelming feeling of peace and comfort came over me.

So many wonderful things have been happening in my life lately. I was honestly contemplating not going simply because I felt as though I needed to be here, and more than anything, this reaffirms that feeling that I had. Thinking about it logically, there is no reason that I should have been denied enrollment at BYU. My grades are good enough, I have family that went there, I have good ecclesiastical recommendations, and everything was in on-time. But, that school is led by the Lord - which leads me to only one conclusion: The Lord needs me to stay here - or at least he doesn't need me in Utah. I have considered re-applying for future semesters or what not, but the story of Martin Harris and the Book of Lehi immediately comes to my head.. and I'd rather not have anything to do with that.

I have made amazing progress in my life over the last year, and it only seems fitting that I should continue that progress here - to continue to develop myself as well as to see through what leaving would have deemed "unfinished business." The thought and idea of leaving has prompted me to do and say things that I probably would not have otherwise gone through with - maybe this was my kick in the butt to stop being reserved, and to say and do the things that I should despite what I may think my future holds in store for me.

This has become an exercise in faith more than anything now - which draws my mind towards Ether 12:6

And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith."

That, I must honestly say, has been the hardest thing for me to trust. I am so caught up in making my own "straight and narrow path" that I lose sight on the doctrine of faith. I assume that because I am living righteously, and have a decent brain, that things should just make sense, and that those things which I perceive to be "obvious"... don't end up happening. I find myself trusting more in my own personal promptings, than I do making sure that I'm in tune with the spirit, and ready and willing to do the things that I am prompted to do.

Maybe this is all just an exercise in humility. A joke the Lord is playing on me to bring me down a notch, to show to me that he really is the one that is in control - and yet that he still knows what is best for me. Well, I am reminded of a talk given in General Conference this last October given by Elder Wirthlin. He spoke of things in his life that happened, many of which most people would find very upsetting. One example was a road trip he was on, in which they found themselves hundreds of miles away from their destination, in the wrong direction, because of a wrong turn they had taken a few hours back. Instead of moping and complaining, he and his fellow travellers found humor in the experience, and made the best of it.

Not going to BYU is nothing that I am going to let myself get down about. Rather, I need to find how to make the best of the situtation, learn, and grow from it - and use this experience to make myself a better individual, in as many ways as I can think of. It's time to continue down the path that I have been paving for myself, and to simply leave this in the past where it belongs.

I look forward to tomorrow, and to all the days that will follow - with a steadfast faith AND trust in Christ - despite the mysterious ways in which he works (haha).

Walk the Walk

2009-03-09T23:41:00.001-05:00

Mosiah 4:19

"And this he did that he himself might go forth among his people, or among the people of Nephi, that he might preach the word of God unto them, to stir them up in remembrance of their duty, and that he might pull down, by the word of God, all the pride and craftiness and all the contentions which were among his people, seeing no way that he might reclaim them save it were in bearing down in pure testimony against them."

I loved the quote that Seth May gave in Elder's Quorum yesterday. It is still resonating with me, and that is something that I have found is rare nowadays, especially with something that I didn't write down. The quote he read (and I don't remember the exact words used, just the gist of it) went something like this:

"Where ever you are, what ever you are doing, constantly bear your testimony. Bear your testimony when you are at school; bear your testimony when you are at work; bear your testimony when you are playing sports; bear your testimony no matter what you are doing. And when you feel it necessary, use words."

That really struck me. We really do have the ability to show someone who we are, simply by the way in which we act, speak, joke around; by our work ethic, what we laugh at, whom we associate with, and the choices we make in our every day lives when surrounded by anyone and everyone. We don't need to pretend as though we are speaking from a pulpit when we bear our testmony. We say that we strive to have Christ's image in our countenance, but what does that really mean?

To me, that means that when someone looks at us, in our every day lives, they see someone who is obviously a follower of the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. That if we were to be accused of being a Christian, or a Mormon, or whatever the accusation may be - that upon review of our lives, day in and day out - there would be overwhelming evidence to convict us of that accusation.

One of the greatest offenses we can do towards another human being, is to let them witness us doing something that would be unbecoming of a member of Christ's true church. For example, and let me use fake names here to illustrate my point. Joe is a member of the church, he works with Hank. Hank is a agnostic person who never really gives much thought to religion, but doesn't reject the idea entirely. He lives a life that suits him, based on his own morals and ideals. Joe knows that Hank wouldn't care if he saw him steal something from work, and there is an item that Joe really wants to have, but wants to be able to use it more than just at work. So, Joe figures out a way that he can steal this item with the only witness being Hank, and since Hank won't really care - definitely not enough to report his good friend - Joe decides to go through with it.

Years go by, and missionaries knock on Hank's door. They tell him about the gospel and Hank seems very receptive, but then something from his past comes to remembrance. He remembers that Joe stole something from work, and these missionaries are telling him that it is wrong to steal. However, Joe was a member of the church these missionaries are from. What kind of impression did Joe's action leave on Hank in regards to his opinion of those who are of that religion? Is Hank inclined to reject the message of these missionaries because of the actions of his good friend Joe? The answer is yes.

Committing sins in and of itself is a terrible thing, but when you commit them in the presence of others, that is one of the worst influences you can have on a person. Salvation only comes in one way, and what a terrible feeling you would have if you knew that a thoughtless act you committed a long time ago was the reason for another human being rejecting the church.

For more examples:

If you skip church to go to a party with a friend, that friend thinks that church attendance must not be very important to that person or to that religion.

If you watch a show or a movie that is obviously not something a member of the church should be viewing, your friends must then realize that your fellow church members must not take holiness and piety very seriously.

If you use foul language around your friends, your friends must them come to the conclusion that members of your church are not very respectful or thoughtful of others.

In many cases, we are the only member of our church that our friends know. We owe it to them, for their eternal destiny, for our own eternal destiny, to represent the church in the best way we know how - by living what it teaches.

Awesome

2009-03-08T23:39:00.003-05:00

Alma 3:27

"For every man receiveth wages of him whom he listeth to obey, and this according to the words of the spirit of prophecy; therefore let it be according to the truth."

Today was awesome! I had invited Maritza to come to church with me, and she had accepted the invite. So Garrett went by her house and had her follow him so that she wouldn't get lost. Garrett is such a stud! Well, they got there shortly before it started, and I am so glad because that gave a few people time enough to say hi and help to make Maritza feel welcome, which I know she appreciated. I also got the chance to give her a spanish copy of the Book of Mormon, which she dearly appreciated because her mother is hispanic, and she is looking forward to showing it (and probably giving it) to her mother.

Today just so happened to be a fast and testimony meeting, and I was glad for that because I know the power of testimonies, and I was excited to see Maritza's reaction to it. I could tell that she was intently pondering on the things that my fellow singles ward members were testifying of, and I could tell that she was feeling the spirit more often than not when they were bearing their testimonies.

I also chose to bear my testimony today, as I have challenged myself to do so EVERY fast Sunday, and since I have made that commitment, I have not failed (I even bore my testimony up in Utah the week that I went to visit haha). I felt inspired to bear my testimony on two things, Eternal families, and modern day prophets. Both of which I have been pondering on a lot for the last month, and both of which are fairly new additions to my testimony. As I was bearing my testimony, I got an overwhelming feeling that what I was saying were exactly the things that Maritza needed to hear. It was wonderful, I felt the spirit so strongly. I asked her if she was willing to let me give her phone number and address to the missionaries, and she answered yes without hesitation. I could feel my spirit smiling. And during Elder's Quorum, I did just that. Hopefully that will lead to a wonderful thing in her life, her eternal life.

She really enjoyed Sunday School as well, which this year we are studying the Doctrine and Covenants. I could tell that she was truly soaking up all of the wonderful things we were discussing today about the restoration of the priesthood, and that she was happy to be learning new and exciting things. Unfortunately she could not stay for Relief Society because she had to take her mother to work, she really did want to stay though - she almost took me up on my offer to take her mother to work for her so that she could stay lol.

After church, I went over to Jordan's house to have a fun dinner with her, Beth, Savannah, and Jordan's family. It was a ton of fun as we hung out listening to music and singing along, and then we played Imaginiff afterwards until it was time to go. I really am going to miss my Chick-fil-A family. They mean the world to me. Though, I know that I am leaving for the right reasons. My education is something that I need to stop putting off, and I need to get on with it. And the only thing that should be worthy of interrupting that until I am done, is a mission.

I look forward to my upcoming life, and I look forward to trusting in the Lord to guide my path as I continue my journey through life. I dont' feel as though I am leaving everything behind me, but that I am seeking new people to add to my personal family (if you will) and new experiences to make me a better and stronger person. I pray for guidance each day, and I believe that with each passing day I learn to follow the promptings of the spirit more and more.

War

2009-03-08T00:59:00.002-06:00

Alma 2:21

"And Alma sent spies to follow the remnant of the Amlicites, that he might know of their plans and their plots, whereby he might guard himself against them, that he might preserve his people from being destroyed."

Many people wonder why the war chapters in the Book of Mormon exist. I think this scripture has much to do with one of the answers to that school of question. I like to think of stories as parables, meaning that whenever I hear a story I try to discern an eternal principle from it, learn and grow from it. When I read that scripture I thought to myself. "Hmm, that's very interesting how Alma chose to approach this war-time dilemma that he was in. He was pursuing his enemy in hopes to end the battle quickly, and so instead of just sitting around and waiting for the battle to come to him, he went and investigated his enemy so that he would be better prepared for the next encounter."

This obviously is nothing that is earth-shakingly brilliant, but it's rather quite obvious as far as war-strategy goes. But what I drew from it is that it parallels our battle with sin and temptation. What did Alma do while he was caught up in making sure that he won the battle at hand? He studied his enemy and figured out the best ways to prepare and encounter them. So I got to thinking, why don't we do that? The parallel I drew, as I mentioned, had to do with sin, and more specifically in thinking about what preparations we do in our daily lives to combat sin.

We truly are in the midst of a war, a war with Satan and his devils. Every day we are tempted, who do you think that tempation comes from? Certainly not our loving Father in Heaven, rather it comes from Satan, the father of all lies. He constantly assails us with temptaion in every shape and size, at all times of the day, and from places that we least expect it. So how does all of this tie into Alma's decision to do a little bit of espionage on the Amlicites? Well, simply put, why don't we do a bit of espionage on Satan and his tactics? Why don't we figure out what he's up to so that we can better fortify ourselves from his assaults? Better yet, in what ways CAN we fortify ourselves? And an even better question, if we have the ability to fortify ourselves against temptation, why don't we?

Well, it is late as of now.. I will probably expound on this in more detail in a future blog, but I need time to think and pray about it. I think I'm on to something here, and I want to take time to collect my thoughts on the subject.

The Difference

2009-03-06T22:00:00.001-06:00

Alma 1:4-5

"And he also testified unto the people that all mankind should be saved at the last day, and that they need not fear nor tremble, but that they might lift up their heads and rejoice; for the Lord had created all men, and had also redeemed all men; and, in the end, all men should have eternal life.

And it came to pass that he did teach these things so much that many did believe on his words, even so many that they began to support him and give him money."

Well, tonight I went to the third wedding that I've ever attended. I don't remember much about the first one because I was so young, but I remember that it was in our house. The second one was the wedding of my great friend Stephanie. Both of those weddings were not in the temple obviously. And tonight, was Ben and Ashley's wedding. I was excited to attend the wedding, and I am so so so happy for them, but it was... weird.

I listened very closely and very intently to everything that was said, the pattern in which things took place, what they placed emphasis on, and so forth. The pastor said numerous things that led the marriage towards God, and I was pleased that they were putting the focus of the union where it should be. However, that being said, it just felt like something was missing. When the pastor made the comment towards the end along the lines of "I have felt the presence of God here tonight," I... had to disagree. I really hadn't felt as though anything special had taken place in the sight of God other than two of his children got married for the space of time given to us in which to dwell on earth. Which obviously is a big step, and one that qualifies us for many rights and blessings not otherwise attainable, within the church or not, but it was missing a key ingredient: Priesthood Authority.

I consider myself better able to tune into the spirit nowadays, thanks to the constancy in which I surround myself with spiritual-enducing media and practices (ie, scriptures, talks, music), and I can honestly say that it would be a stretch to say that God was with Ben and Ashley tonight as far as their wedding being what it should be.

I love Ben and Ashley so much, and now, more than ever, I hope they find the path towards truth. I want more than anything for them, for their marriage to become an eternal marriage, and not something that ends when Christ comes again. I think about all of the non-temple weddings that have taken place over the course of time, and the pain and sorrow that will be prevalent when people realize that they are not going to be by the side of their earthly partner for the rest of eternity. Or maybe they will be, but not within the glory of the Celestial Kingdom. I don't quite know how the intricacies of the two lower kingdoms work as far as marriage go, but be that as it may, what is a marriage with out the ability to have an eternal increase?

Tonight strengthened my testimony of the sanctity of temple weddings, and the wonderful sealing power that is associated with them. I hope to live every day of mine in accordance with that testimony, so that one day I may be blessed enough to wed within the temple, for time and all eternity. I can't imagine anything on this earth that could bring me more joy than that fateful day. :)

To Infiniti...

2009-03-06T01:27:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 29:20

"...and thus doth the Lord work with his power in all cases among the children of men, extending the arm of mercy towards them that put their trust in him."

I am at peace today, I just hope I can keep it up - no matter what my ever-changing schedule may present as a challenge. With faith and trust in the Lord, anything is possible.

Unwanted

2009-03-04T23:36:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 28:3

"Now they were desirous that salvation should be declared to every creature, for they could not bear that any human soul should perish; yes, even the very thoughts that any soul should endure endless torment did cause them to quake and tremble."

Tonight I got a reminder of just how powerful music can be. I tend to think of songs whenever I hear phrases that match the lyrics of a song that I know. Tonight, while I was closing at work, one of my employees said a couple of words that match the lyrics from a song that I used to listen to on occasion a few years ago.. and it is not a very wholesome song in the least, quite explicit lyrics. Well, I have not listened to this song in quite a while, yet when I heard that phrase, it came back to me as though I had just heard it earlier that day, and immediately caused me to have a slightly different spirit about me.

Can we really risk that? Can we allow ourselves to welcome into our minds things that we wouldn't want there during our most personal moments? If that song happened to pass through my head whilst I was at church, or at the temple... I would really be upset with myself for ever hearing the song in the first place. If I'd never allowed myself to hear it, or if I'd purposefully avoided it after hearing it once, it would never be able to plague me while I am doing something, let alont while I'm having a sacred experience.

But really, it goes beyond music (though music sure is the most powerful form of media we have, in my opinion). Movies, television shows, internet clips, books, any form of media-intake that we have available to us will always be with us in at least a small sense. Can we really risk having any of that come back to us when we don't want it there? Satan can't plant things into our brain that aren't already there, but he certainly does have the capability of taking what is there, and making it surface. We need to keep ourselves spotless from the world, and that is one of the most important aspects of it.

I have blogged on this before, but I felt it was important to bring it up again, because I certainly had a shocking reminder of it tonight, and I was beside myself.

Hearken!

2009-03-03T23:44:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 27:24-26

"For, said he, I have repented of my sins, and have been redeemed of the Lord; behold I am born of the Spirit.

And the Lord said unto me: Marvel not that all mankind, yea, men and women, all nations, kindreds, tongues and people, must be born again; yes, born of God, changed from their carnal and fallen state, to a state of righteousness, being redeemed of God, becoming his sons and daughters;

And thus they become new creatures; and unless they do this, they can in nowise inherit the kingdom of God."

My heart cries out in thanksgiving for the power of the atonement. There is nothing worse in this mortality than the feeling of eternal guilt, for my heart has felt it. However, that feeling has led me to also understanding the joy of eternal forgiveness and happiness.

"For behold this is my work and my glory; to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man."

There is no greater feeling that I can imagine, than coming to the realization that you have achieved Celestial Glory. I look forward to that day with earnestness. I yearn for it. Every fiber of my being aches for it. I no longer strive for righteousness out of fear of the alternative, for that can only carry you so far.

But what I think most people miss in this life, is that God is cheering us on. How can we reject the aid and guidance of someone who is both omniscient and omnipotent? People constantly try to fight and wrestle with God, thinking that their decisions are better than what he would have for us. What an arrogant and prideful viewpoint! God's work and God's glory is to help us and guide us along the path to eternal life. Let him!

He is willing to open door after door for us, all we have to do is give him the opportunity to do so. Through prayer and scripture study, we develop our abilities to discern his counsel and his guidance. So why would we not participate in these things with an open heart and with true intent?

True Conversion

2009-03-02T23:53:00.004-06:00

Mosiah 26:22-24

"For behold, this is my church; whosoever is baptized shall be baptized unto repentance. And whomsoever ye receive shall believe in my name; and him will I freely forgive.

For it is I that taketh upon me the sins of the world; for it is I that hath created them; and it is I that granteth unto him that believeth unto the end a placea t my right hand.
For behold, in my name are they called; and if they know me they shall come forth and shall have a place eternally at my right hand."

So, I have been pondering today about the various stages of conversion to the gospel, and I think I have a grasp on my thoughts now. I look at people in the church, and really, in any religion, and I see various types of people, categorically if you will.

Some seem to be doing all the right things when they're at church and around their church buds, but then you see them out late at night hanging around (and talking differently) with other crowds of kids, and it makes you wonder. Some people openly say they are searching for religion, but don't seem to be making any outward strides to finding a relationship with God. Some people seem to be making very concerted efforts towards righteousness, but always seem to get side tracked and are always making up ground. Some people do mostly a great job of living their religion, and only have a few slip ups here and there. And then there are those people that don't even think about religion, they just go about their day helping people out, constantly smiling, and always seem to love life.

Now, obviously I missed a few descriptions of people, but you get my drift. What is it about people, when it comes to religion and righteousness, that makes us all so different? What goes on in our hearts and minds that differentiates us from the next person? Well, I have come up with the 3 levels of conversion to attempt to illustrate a point.

1) Going through the motions.
This stage of conversion is the first sign of an effort towards righteousness. We figure out what it is that we SHOULD be doing, and even though our psyche may not agree, we do it anyways. Doing so often conflicts with what we may think to be the correct course of action given a decision, but we put aside our instincts in order to get in the habit of doing what we feel we should be doing.

Many people are in this stage of conversion, and often times those people appear to be hypocrites, while that may not be a correct judgment at all. They realize things that should be different in their lives, whether or not their heart is in alignment with this school of thought or not. And in coming to that realization they force themselves to do things they otherwise would not do. This is a hard thing to do constantly, and therefore they find themselves not "going through the motions" some times, and when someone witnesses this, it often times creates the perception of someone who is confused and lost.

However, we all must start at this stage, because the things of righteousness simply do not come naturally. We are naturally selfish beings, so being selfless is often times a foreign concept. We naturally are prideful and want glory, therefore being humble is quite often a task for us when we are first introduced to the topic (some people find out about humility whilst still a young child, others don't see its benefits until much later in their life, we all go through our own experiences and trials). However, it is what it is, and we all spend varying amounts of time in this stage.

2) Obeying because it is "what is right."
At first glance, this seems exactly the same as stage number one, but there is a bit of a difference. In stage number one you are mentally converted to what is the correct course of action or behavior. Here, your heart becomes more closely aligned to righteousness. You choose a faith that makes sense to you, one that you believe is correct, and you begin living according to that faith.

Now that your heart is aligned with the aforementioned religion, it becomes easier to follow in righteousness because you now believe it is the right thing to do, as opposed to just knowing it. This is where you become a more faithful person, you appear to do all the right things, and are honestly a very religious person.

This is where most people, that have chosen a religion, and attend every week (or as often as possible) fall. They fulfill their church callings faithfully, they read the scriptures daily, they do everything that they believe is righteous and holy. These are good people through and through that seem to only have a few faults, but hey, don't we all?

3) True conversion.
This is, I believe, where we should all be striving to end up.

In stage 1, our minds were converted.
In stage 2, our hearts were converted.
Here in stage 3, finally our soul, our every moral fiber, is converted.

I have described this, to a point, in previous blogs, but I want to go into further detail this time. When I talk about converting your soul, you no longer worry about what the "rule set" of your respective religion is. This is where you begin living the standards of the church because the principles of your religion are the same principles in which YOU believe, no just because your church says they are correct. You don't fully reach this stage of conversion until you don't have to think about your actions based on what is "right", but rather you naturally "choose the right" with out having to consciously think about it.

This is where you begin living the gospel in your every action, word, and even thought. Again, not because you are trying to strive towards the model of behavior defined by your church, but because every fiber of your being strives towards it simply because that is what it is programmed to do.

When you are truly converted to the gospel of Christ, your every thought is turned towards the betterment of those around you. You fulfill your church callings because you honestly believe that is the best way you can show your appreciation for the love that Christ gives you, because that is the best way you can reach out to your fellow brethren. You read the scriptures daily because you honestly can't get enough of them. They come alive and jump off of the pages to you. You listen to the prophets and apostles with anxious ears so that you can get to know them better and understand their spirit. You don't even notice 'things of the world' any more because you're so caught up in the spiritual aspect of life and righteousness, that you are no longer enticed by the cheap alternatives Satan gives you.

You may have been doing all of these things already, but there is a new meaning and purpose to them. You are no longer having to remind yourself to get things done pertaining to righteousness, they simply become second nature.

There is a scripture I like that illustrates this vast difference:

Mosiah 3:19
For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.

Let's break that scripture down a just a little bit.
We are all natural men, we can thank Adam for that, though it's nothing we should be ashamed of. It is part of our test, in order to be rewarded for living a Christ-like life, don't we have to change something about us? What would there be to reward if we were born with the ability to lead a perfect life without difficulty? In the New Testament, Christ often references "rewards in heaven." What are we deserving of if we don't have to overcome something? That obstacle we must overcome is the natural man.

So you might ask, what is the natural man? King Benjamin clearly defines that here, by defining the opposite. He describes things that the natural man isn't: submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, and willing to submit to his father. Can you honestly say that as a human being, with carnal instincts that you are humble? have patience? loving towards EVERYONE? meek? I sure can't.

So now how do we overcome the natural man? King Benjamin also explains this. By yielding to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, understanding and accepting the atonment of Christ (for, you have to understand it to be able to accept it), and by becoming as a little child (see: the previous paragraph).

Well, what are the enticings of the Holy Spirit?
He testifies of Jesus Christ and of Truth. Which Truth can only be understood to be the correct way to live our life.

Moroni 7:32
"And by so doing, the Lord God prepareth the way that the residue of men may have faith in Christ, that the Holy Ghost may have place in their hearts, according to the power thereof; and after this manner bringeth to pass the Father, the covenants which he hath made unto the children of men."

Moroni 10:5
"And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things."

Those are quite the enticings! The enticings of faith in Christ, as well as our sacred covenants, and oh wait, the truth of all things! Sounds like someone I should definitely give heed to. We have scriptural evidence here that the Holy Spirit speaks to both our mind and our heart, which equates to our soul. The Holy Spirit really is behind everything we do, he is our constant companion and friend. He, along with the Father and the Son, want the best for us, and is willing to aid us in whatever thing we set out to achieve in righteousness.

Let's let him into our hearts and start living the gospel because it comes naturally, not because we know or feel that it is right! I can honestly say that it has begun feeling natural to me. I'm not perfect by any means, but it is the greatest feeling in the world. :)

Mortality

2009-03-01T23:04:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 25:24

"And they were called the people of God. And the Lord did pour out his Spirit upon them, and they were blessed, and propsered in the land."

I look out the window and I behold the eternities,

Though my eyes are not what they could be.

What do I behold? What is out there?

I would not be able to see it if it were not for thee.

My hands are busy here, always following commands,

Though slow at first, they eventually keep up pace.

Whom do they serve? Are they the hands of man?

They strive to do nothing but bring a smile to thy face.

Gibberish here, half-uttered words there,

Praise, slander, idleness, silence, they can evoke a tear.

Why so loud? Do they not all count?

Every spoken word should take into consideration thine ear.

Fleeting in, fleeting out, sometimes they stick,

Thinking of that, this can become, thinking not, never is so.

Can he not sense them? Are they not under control?

Through discipline, nothing but good thoughts can grow.

We once had a choice, to continue choosing or to not,

Two choices were presented, life eternal or otherwise.

Why would we go on not choosing? Why give in?

Our choices should be towards him, I do surmise.

These Latter Days

2009-02-28T23:50:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 24:14

"And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions"

So much for the audio cd's I was making.. I caved in and bought myself a 16GB iPod today haha. That's going to make it so much easier porting my music around, as well as shuffling through it in the car (less dangerous, yay!). Technology is simply amazing these days. The day or so after a talk is given in General Conference, you can download it to your computer, and then onto a small 8 ounce device that can hold thousands of simliar audio recordings, and then listen to it whenever or wherever you want to. Astounding!

When I think of things like that I think back to the days of King Benjamin and his address to his people. He had to build a tower simply so that more people could hear his speak than otherwise would be able to. In addition they had people writing down and/or repeating the address so that all those who were gathered 'round could hear (or read) the message. People spent days or even weeks preparing to hear the words of the prophet, and here we are with the ability to sit in the comfort of our own homes and listen to the same type of message. Yet some of us are too caught up in the world around us to even pay attention to that.

People in the past had to travel for weeks on end to visit the temple, even now some people have a day or more worth of driving to do to visit a temple. And some people have a temple almost literally in their back yard, yet are too lazy (or whatever) to make the effort to go when the opportunities arise.

What is it about our current generation that seems to put such little effort or desire into feasting upon the words of our prophet and apostles? Just because things are more readily available doesn't mean the message is any less applicable or meaningful. Instead of being complacent with the availability of such powerful messages, we should be capitalizing on the ease of it by taking the small amount of time required to be edified and uplifted by these words.

I think the problem is with the numerous media avenues that are readily available 24/7. We get distracted by the television, by less than inspiring music, by books that do us no good, by movies that do nothing but numb the mind and so forth. These replacements for quality use of time, time which could be spent striving to feel the spirit, lead us down nothing but a downward path.

All that being said, I didn't use to think this way once, nor did these perceptions cross my mind. I find myself almost instantly holding everyone around me up to a different standard that I used to, and I've realized that I shouldn't be doing so necessarily. My life used to be completely different, and it took me a while, but I turned it around. I shouldn't be expecting others to live up to the standards I have for myself simply because one day a thought came to me, and not to them. All I can do is accept my own current state of mind and my own current desires, and continue to live them to the best of my abilities, while at the same time extending a hand of fellowship and love to my brothers and sisters. Words of encouragement and inspiration are what should be coming out of my mouth as opposed to words of accusation and beratement. That is how Christ would do it, therefore that is the example I should be following.

Modern Prophets

2009-02-27T23:35:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 23:10-11

"Nevertheless, after much tribulation, the Lord did hear my cries, and did answer my prayers, and has made me an instrument in his hands in bringing so many of you to a knowledge of his truth.

Nevertheless, in this I do not glory, for I am unworthy to glory of myself."

Well, I have begun my goal of making audio CD's for all of the General Conference talks given by the prophtes and apostles since 2003. Unfortunately, only 4 (5 if one of the talks is short, and we all know how often a general authority gives a "short" talk!) of them fit onto one CD, so I've used 16 CD's for just Hinkley, Monson, Faust, Eyring and Uchtdorf. Oh well, it is awesome to listen to these talks while I drive to and from work, and wherever else I travel. It helps keep me focused on things that matter throughout the day. I think I finally have a solution to my problem in finding a "spiritual lunch" to complement my spiritual breakfast (1 chapter out of the Book of Mormon) and dinner (this blog).

I love the words of the leaders of the church. They truly are inspired of God. I do not consider myself a crier, but I was brought to tears by one of President Monson's talks on the way to work today. It was such a touching story, and I felt the spirit so strongly as I listened to it. I look forward to more moments such as that one. When you surround yourself with things that help to facilitate the presence of the spirit, your testimony can not help but be strengthened.

I would encourage all members of the church to download the general conference addresses, and listen to them as often as time permits. They are not simply meant to be heard once, and only on the day they are given, but they stand as testaments of our time. These leaders of our church address us only a handful of times each year, what they say is of such great importance that we should try to listen to them daily. I'm sure we all would love to hear them speak to us daily, to give us counsel each and every day on how we should live that day. So why not allow them to do so by re-visiting the words they have given to us daily (or, at least as often as time permits)?

Amos 3:7

"Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secret unto his servants the prophets."

D&C 1:38

"What I the Lord have spoken, I have spoken, and I excuse not myself; and though the heavens and the earth shall pass away, my word shall not pass away, but shall all be fulfilled, whether by mine own voice or by the voice of my servants, it is the same."

And who are the Lord's servants? As Amos himself said, the Lord's servants are the prophets. Many times members of the church get so wrapped up in understanding every fine detail of the standard works that they lose sight of the importance of revelation, modern-day revelation. Yes, the scriptures are wonderful, and without the Book of Mormon and the Bible, the world would be far worse off than it is today. But the wonderfulness of a living prophet that receives direct guidance from God, for our day, and for OUR futures? That is irreplacable and incomprable. We should not only be feasting from the scriptures, but we should also feast from the words of our living prophet and apostles. They are in tune with the current struggles and needs of the church, as well as those of the world. If I were to choose someone to help me make the right choices in my life, I sure as anything would prefer someone who loves me, cares about me, and recieves direct influence from God himself!

KISS

2009-02-26T23:27:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 22:7

"And I will go according to thy command and pay the last tribute of wine to the Lamanites, and they will be drunken; and we will pass through the secret pass on the left of their camp when they are drunken and asleep."

Institute was great as always tonight. I really enjoy the topics we cover this semester, especially since they are what the apostles have been speaking about recently. Tonight we discussed L. Tom Perry's recent talk about simplicity. I really enjoy that topic because I have such a testimony of it. My testimony has been strengthened so much by that principle. There are 4 things we discussed today that are all we need in life (as discovered by Henry David Thoreau years ago).

1. Food

2. Clothing

3. Shelther

4. Fuel

The first 3 don't take explanation, but they can all have both positive and negative influences on our life, in various forms. I won't discuss these too much because they are not what are directly on my mind at the time, but I still want to say something briefly about each of them.

Food is obviously vital for our existence, but we need to make sure we are eating the right foods. This is where the Lord's guidance comes in to play, specifically names the Word of Wisdom. There is a really cool video about that found here.

Clothing is vital as well, for various reasons. But thanks to the adversary, even this basic need has to be governed as well. Far too many people of this day and age use clothing in inappropriate ways to attract members of the opposite sex. Doing so does nothing but disrespect the fact that our bodies are temples, and should be treated as such.

Shelter is what keeps us safe and protected from much of the world around us. However, even this has become something of an idol in this day and age. Many people view their home as their "status" for others to see, and in turn strive to have as large a house as they can, or have as many nice and expensive things in it despite what might be a subpar income for the standard of living they desire. Living within your means truly is a principle that must be adhered to. Without doing so how can you ever plan for the future or expect to be able to provide for more than just yourself?

Fuel, that is the one that has been on my mind more lately. We know we that are both a body and a spirit, so it stands for reason that both need nourishment (as I have discussed in a previous post.) Returning to our Father in Heaven requires spiritual fuel, and constant and daily attention to that fact.

And that's it. Those are the only 4 things we need. Everything else comes as extra. Now, obviously, the 4th one (being fuel) is pretty all encompassing as it entails pretty much the entirety of our religious practices (church meetings, service, scripture study, etc), but so many people miss the bar here. They fill their lives with things that, eternally, just do not matter. This is something I have been working on in my life for a while now, and as I have gotten better about it, I really have come to enjoy the added peace that I have received due to it.

Computer games, avid sports watching, superfluous music, mindless tv-programs, mindless movies, hobbies that don't benefit any body, loud parties, and so forth. These things (for the most part) do nothing but take time away from you, time which could be spent strengthening your testimony, giving service, spending time with your family, etc. If something can't be classified as Food/Shelther/Clothing/Fuel - then is it really worth your time? Worth the time of a son or daughter of God? Worth the time of someone who will hopefully inherit all that their Father has, and needs to be as spiritually sound as possible to do so?

We are held to such a high standard by our Father in Heaven, should we not hold ourselves to that same standard? Christ led a very simple life. He truly did set the example in all things. In what ways can we simplify our lives and find more time for those things that really do matter?

Ammon

2009-02-25T23:15:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 21:33

"...And Ammon declined doing this thing, considering himself an unworthy servant."

Really? Ammon considered himself unworthy to do baptize king Limhi? Ammon is a staple of righteousness for us to follow, but this shows documentation that even he had struggles in his life that prevented him from being able to excercise his priesthood at times. However he still had the moral fortitude to not dishonor his authority and his priesthood. King Limhi was SO desirous to be baptized, it would have been so easy for Ammon to lie to himself and to God and perform the ordinance that he had the authority to be able to do. However he lacked the worthiness to do so, and therefore humbled himself before king Limhi and did not baptize him.

How painful an experience that must have been for both parties:

1) The sorrow that I'm sure king Limhi felt, that finally there was a man of God that had come to liberate them from their predicament, and who had also brought the message of the gospel with him! But that same man could not give him the one thing he truly desired at that moment in time: baptism into the true church. Which baptism would have entitled king Limhi to the gift of the Holy Ghost as well as all of the other blessings which follow with it, which most likely would have made ruling his people under the guidance of the Lord a bit easier as well.

2) I'm sure that Ammon's soul was tormented with sorrow and regret for whatever sin it was that he committed which caused him to be unworthy to perform an ordinance that would have meant so much to not only king Limhi, but all of Limhi's followers that also yearned for baptism. But what an example he was despite his period of tribulation. To be able to look king Limhi in the face and apologize that he could not baptize him. How many of us make the decision to take the sacrament unworthily, simply because our friends might be watching and we wouldn't want them to think less of us. Ammon stared an entire nation in the face and told them he was unworthy to do for them the thing that had become the most important thing on their agenda, every single person's agenda!

The Lord truly looks on the heart, and Ammon remembered that. Even if we have struggles in our lives with worthiness, or whatever our struggle may be, the Lord will always judge us based on our intentions and our desire to do what is right. Not what may seem popular, or will make the most amount of people happy (whether it be a temporary happiness or a longer-lasting one), but that which will make the Lord happy. We must strive to keep that close to our heart.

What Matters Most

2009-02-24T23:28:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 20:11

"And it came to pass that the people of Limhi began to drive the Lamanites before them; yet they were not half so numerous as the Lamanites. But they fought for their lives, and for their wives, and for their children; therefore they exerted themselves and like dragons did they fight."

Where on earth can I find heaven? The answer lies in that verse right there. In my family. My current family, and my future family - those are honestly the only 2 things in the world that mean more than anything else. If you live your life so that those 2 things are in order, and are always first in every choice you make. It is very hard to go wrong.

Friendly Surmising

2009-02-23T23:45:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 19:20

"And the king commanded them that they should not return; and they were angry with the king, and caused that he should suffer, even unto death by fire."

It's odd that as I am preparing to leave the area/state, those that I have been spending my time with here in the Grapevine/Colleyville/Lake Worth areas.. are getting far closer to me than at any other point in time previously. I feel as though I am just now making close friendships with those that have seemingly been my good friends for the last little while. And not simply the sort of friends that you forget a couple of months after moving away either, but the type of friends that you remain close to for the entirety of your lives. Then again, maybe it's the prospect of me moving that is causing the bonds to be formed. I'm not saying that is definitely the case, but the correlation certainly is there.

Maybe it's me. Maybe I am finally being the friend I always should have been because I'm trying to squeeze in time with friends that I might have been neglecting in the past? That would certainly follow a trail of logic.

Also, on the topic of friends, I find it quite interesting that my best friends at this point in time are far younger than me. (24, 24, 21, 21, 20, 19, 19, 18, 17, 17 - averages out to 20 exactly). Is there something to that? I really don't know. I've always considered myself comfortable with those in the older crowd of things (thanks to my family), but I always tend to find myself mingling more often with those of a younger generation. And if and when I do move to Utah, I don't see that necessarily changing. I'm not quite sure why this is, but it simply is.

Happiness Is A Choice

2009-02-22T20:58:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 18:21

"And he commanded them that there should be no contention one with another, but that they should look forward with one eye, having one faith and one baptism, having their hearts knit together in unity and in love one towards another."

Well, today I gave a talk in church for the first time in about 9 or 10 years, so I figured it would be fun to post the whole talk. I have received much positive feedback about it, far more than I expected, and far more than just cordial feedback, which completely caught me off guard. Anyways, here is what I worked on for the last week.

Happiness is a choice

Everyone close your eyes, picture happiness, what do you see?

Green fields
Butterflies
Clear sky
Mother and Father
Siblings
Children
On vacation
At work
In schools
At the temple
At church
Taking the sacrament
Praying
Serving a mission
Eternal life
Singing, or playing a musical instrument
Playing baseball, volleyball, basketball, or your sport of choice
Hanging out with friends, laughing, and enjoying each other’s company
Or maybe you’re not picturing any of these things, and that’s perfectly all right, Happiness is different for each person, and that is divine.

Keep your eyes closed, but I’m going to change this up a little bit, are you happy when you think of these things?

Talking behind others’ backs
Feel too lazy to help someone in their time of need
Lie to someone
Don’t work as hard as you could at your respective jobs
Use language that you know Heavenly Father wouldn’t approve of

I don’t want to beat too long on the negative side of things, but I assume the difference between these 2 lists is obvious. There may not be an apparent difference in how we act or think when choosing things from these 2 lists to do, but I would go as far as to say that at one point in time throughout the day, we always recognize the effect such activities have on our spirit.

2 Nephi 2:25-27
“Adam fell that men might be; and men are that they might have joy.
“And the Messiah cometh in the fulness of time, that he may redeem the children of men from the fall. And because that they are redeemed from the fall they have become free forever, knowing good from evil; to act for themselves and not to be acted upon, save it be by the punishment of the law at the great and last day, according to the commandments which God hath given.
“Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself.”

Is not the purpose of this life to exercise our free agency and be able to stand before God at the judgment bar and say that we used our free agency for righteousness, and for the betterment of not only our standing, but for the betterment of the lives of those around us? It all centers on choice.

[Rainbows in Great-Grandma’s Bedroom] – Ray Goldrup

http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=21bc9fbee98db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=7ab78bf6248ad010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1

That’s the key. To be happy despite events that would otherwise make us sad, and to always think of others in nothing but a positive light. For we are all children of the same Heavenly Father, are we not all entitled to such a high estimation from our eternal siblings?

So, in my preparing for this talk, I thought about how one successfully chooses to be happy. And through much pondering and searching I came up with 6 things, I call them the 6 Keys to Eternal Happiness – and they are all centered on our own personal choices, and not the choices of others.

But before I read them, I want to pose 2 questions.
“Why is it that there are so many popular and wealthy people in this world that are not happy?
“Why are there numerous poor and physically-suffering people that are always smiling?

6 Keys to Happiness

(Most important) Plan to be happy.

Alma 27:16-18
“And it came to pass that as Ammon was going forth into the land, that he and his brethren met Alma, over in the place of which has been spoken; and behold, this was a joyful meeting.
“Now the joy of Ammon was so great even that he was full; yea, he was swallowed up in the joy of his God, even to the exhausting of his strength; and he fell again to the earth.
“Now was not this exceeding joy? Behold, this is joy which none receiveth save it be the truly penitent and humble seeker of happiness.”

We must seek out happiness, for how can we obtain something that we aren’t looking for? We aren’t simply going to stumble across something that means that much to us. We must not only search for happiness, but we also must prepare our minds and our spirits so that when we do find something that makes us truly happy, we are able to receive it. George Burns once posed a question: “Am I living a life I love, and one that allows me to be happy?”

He didn’t ask “are things happening in my life that cause me to be happy? Are those around me dragging me out of my sorrow and lifting me up?” No, he focused on our own personal accountability for the way in which we view our own lives. We must plan to be happy; we must shape our own lives around things that make us, respectively, happy. These things that we must shape our lives around could be those things we imagined just a few moments ago. And that’s where happiness is different for each person. The things that make me happy aren’t necessarily the same things that make you happy, nor should they necessarily be. We all lead different lives and have different struggles, and therefore we all are inspired in different ways and we all have different ways of becoming happier people. That being said, one simple way to define a “happiness plan” is to do things we love to do, be with people we love to be with, and think things that uplift us – not things that drag us down.

Become comfortable with yourself and who you are.

This is probably the hardest one of the 6, but it is so vital. We must come to an understanding of who we are. We ARE children of God, and therefore we are entitled to blessings and the comfort of the spirit. Can anything else bring more happiness than that?

It always amazes me when I see people get upset, truly and honestly upset, over things that really just do not matter. Many people raise their voices out of anger when their favorite team makes a dumb play, or when someone makes a degrading comment about them, for whatever reason. Those who react angrily to comments about them must not understand who they are. What cause do I have to take offense and continue an argument with someone who is insulting me? For I am a child of God, and therefore should understand that no matter what this person may think or say, God knows who I am, and He loves me, and that should be enough.

That bring me to a scripture in 3 Nephi 11:29-30:
“For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another.
"Behold, this is not my doctrine to stir up the hearts of men with anger, one against another; but this is my doctrine, that such things should be done away.”

Do away with your anger towards others. Find within yourselves the ability to discern that which is worth bring upset about, as opposed to the small and insignificant irritants of your daily lives. I will expound more on this in key #6.

Surround yourself with happy people, and partake in uplifting activities.

Do things such as read your scriptures, pray always, go to church, pay your tithing, listen to wholesome and uplifting music, spend time with your family as often as time permits, be active, and so forth. Now, if that is good advice, so apparently is the admonition to avoid the alternative.

4 Nephi 1:16
“And there were no envyings, nor strifes, nor tumults, nor whoredoms, no lyings, nor murders, nor any manner of lasciviousness; and surely there could not be a happier people among all the people who had been created by the hand of God.”

Really? Let me read that again. “There could not be a happier people among all the people who had been created by the hand of God.” That includes everyone! Everyone on this world, as well as any world God may have ever created. The Nephites and Lamanites went through respective cycles of righteousness, as well as those of wickedness, but this moment in time, about 38 years after Christ appeared to them, they were so righteous and prosperous that they were doing better at being happy than anyone else, ever, in the history of the word ever. And what is remarkable about it is that it all stemmed from the choices they made. So let’s figure out what those choices were.

4 Nephi 1:15
“And it came to pass that there was no contention in the land, because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people.”

The love of God. That is what we need to seek after, that is what we need to choose to have. And is not charity the pure love of Christ? That leads me to key #4.

Serve Others.

It amazes me how this works. Whenever I am feeling down, or sad, or any negative emotion, the thing that helps to reverse that more than anything is to give unselfishly of myself, to serve whomever I can. Whether it be doing the dishes for my Mother, or giving someone a ride to church that doesn’t have another means of transportation, or mowing the yard for an elderly couple that has difficulty doing so, or even baking cookies or muffins for a family that might need a lifting of spirits. We cannot help but feel good about ourselves, and we cannot help but be happy when we unselfishly help another one of God’s children. Additionally, when we think on the problems other people have, our own problems seem less serious, and are less apt to affect us negatively.

We must always remember just how much we have to give to others; our knowledge, wisdom, experience, advice, our time, our strength, our laughter, our abilities to make other people smile, and so forth.

There is a common misconception about the order of things when it comes to happiness and action. Many people think it is logical that we act based on how we feel. That if we feel sad, we will sit about our house and not do much of anything, that if we feel energetic we’ll go outside and jog around the block, that if we feel happy we will find ourselves smiling and giving service. I disagree. I believe that it is actually the opposite.

We feel based on the way we act. If we want to be happy, then do things that make you happy, no matter what mood you may currently be in. If we want to be sad, then we will find ourselves avoiding things that make us happy, which seems completely odd to me. I can relate from personal experience, there have been times that I have been sad and sorrowful, and crying, and it doesn’t really matter what it was about. But I have distinct memories of pushing my family members away that were attempting to comfort me in my time of need. Why was I doing that? Why was I rejecting something that would make me happy? It’s because I desired to be sad, and I would not let myself make the choice to change my attitude at that specific point in time.

And that’s exactly what it is, our choice. We choose to act in ways that bring us happiness, or we choose to be sad and wallow in our own imperfections and shortcomings.

Show gratitude.

You cannot help but be happy when you find yourself thanking someone for something they did. It goes completely against the nature of being thankful. Think about it, when you are thanking someone, are you frowning, or are you smiling? But we need to not only thank those around us; we also need to thank the Lord. We must count our blessings and in doing so we will realize just how much in our lives we have to be thankful for, no matter how sorrowful we may be at that moment in time. In fact, we are commanded to do so.

Alma 34:38
“That ye contend no more against the Holy Ghost, but that ye receive it, and take upon you the name of Christ; that ye humble yourselves even to the dust, and worship God, in whatsoever place ye may be in, in spirit and in truth; and that ye live in thanksgiving daily, for the many mercies and blessings which he doth bestow upon you.”

Keeping things in perspective will truly show us that no matter how difficult our life may seem, or how rude some people may appear, we always have reason to be thankful, and reason enough to love. And that brings me to my final Key to Happiness.

Have and maintain an Eternal perspective.

Alma 41:5-6 (Alma speaking to his son Corianton)
“The one raised to happiness according to his desires of happiness, or good; and the other to evil according to his desires of evil; for as he has desired to do evil all the day long even so shall he have his reward of evil when the night cometh.
“And so it is on the other hand. If he hath repented of his sins, and desired righteousness until the end of his days, even so he shall be rewarded unto righteousness.”

That scares me to death. That the level of happiness that I desire here on earth will be the same level of happiness I shall obtain in the world to come. If that is true, how can anyone be fooled into thinking that happiness isn’t our own decision? Why would God base such an eternal and everlasting principle on something that is not in our complete control? Our test in this life is to see how we will use our free agency, and to see what we will seek out given our own personal time and ability to choose. Yet, it is that very thing that will either lead us towards eternal happiness or eternal misery. We truly will have those things that we seek after, and the things that we desire.

Mosiah 2:41 (King Benjamin)
“And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. O remember, remember that these things are true; for the Lord God hath spoken it.”

I want never-ending happiness! Who’s with me? The choice is ours. Just as I read in 2 Nephi, we are free to choose liberty and eternal life, or captivity and death, and the choice starts with our hearts.

So why is it that a poor man can be truly happy, while a wealthy man finds no comfort in his riches? There are 2 answers:
1) Because, to find happiness, you must make the choice to focus on others, instead of on yourself.
2) Because things of this world, things we leave behind when we die, are not the things that we should be choosing as our avenue of obtaining happiness. Those who truly understand who they are, and what awaits them in the kingdoms of glory after this life passes; those are the people that have zero reason to ever not be happy. They choose to keep their eternal perspective on life at the forefront of their mind, for when you know the Celestial Kingdom awaits you, what reason do you have to mope about the trials of today?

Abinadi

2009-02-22T00:02:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 17:9

"Now Abinadi said unto him: I say unto you, I will not recall the words which I have spoken unto you concerning this people, for they are true; and that ye may know of their surety I have suffered myself that I have fallen into your hands."

Wow, what an amazing display of dedication to the gospel! Abinadi shows us all right there just how important the message that Christ lives truly is! It is so important that it outweighs the importance of our lives. I hope that I have enough faith in my beliefs that if my life were threatened, and I would be allowed to live only if I recounted my beliefs, that I would have the resoluteness to bear my testimony instead. I think I do, but I suppose one only knows the answer to that if they are put in that situation.

I've often thought that it is more difficult to "live for your beliefs" than it is to "die for your beliefs." One is instantaneous, and the other takes your entire life. I suppose that choice is certainly a good representation of how importance it is to live our lives in preparation for the world to come as opposed to living for the current day. Here's to enduring to the end!

Luke Warm Feet

2009-02-20T23:17:00.004-06:00

Mosiah 16:9

"He is the light and the life of the world; yea, a light that is endless, that can never be darkened; yea, and also a life which is endless, that there can be no more death."

Today was fairly uneventful as far as most opinions would go. However, I began preparing for my talk on Sunday, and got a good 2 hours of research and typing done. So it is mostly finished, I think, we'll see what the next 2 days do to the current state of my talk. I am very excited to give this talk, despite the fact that it is the first talk I will have given in approximately a decade, and to top it off I am the final speaker... so I get all of the remaining time left over from the first 2 speakers.. go me! Though, I do not fear that I will be guided in what to say, as my mind has literally been pondering the topic ever since the moment I was asked to give this talk last week. I will pray for the Lord to impress me as far as what to say, and I do not doubt His ability to do so, or His desire. That being said, I don't have much time to prepare this talk. I work at 11am tomorrow and wont get home until 11:30pm or so, which means work will take up over 12 hours of my day. Additionally, I am going to the Grapevine Ward this Sunday, which means I have to get some sleep, especially since I am playing a musical number for their sacrament meeting! I think my solution to this will be to skip the Grapevine Ward's elders quorum meeting and use that extra hour or so to finalize my talk.. because I have to get to my ward early (as always) for choir practice! There just are NOT enough hours in the day! I however do not doubt that I will make the necessary preparations, or that I will have the proper spirit with me as I speak to my singles ward. I truly do look forward to it.

Temple Day

2009-02-19T23:41:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 15:26-27

"But behold, and fear, and tremble before God, for ye ought to tremble; for the Lord redeemeth none such that rebel against him and die in their sins; yes, even all those that have perished in their sins ever since the world began, that have wilfully rebelled against God, that have known the commandments of God, and would not keep them; these are they that have no part in the first resurrection.

Therefore ought ye not to tremble? For salvation cometh to none such; for the Lord hath redeemed none such; yea, neither can the Lord redeem such; for he cannot deny himself; for he cannot deny justice when it has its claim."

Today was simply an amazing day. Seeing the seed of the gospel unmistakably planted in someone's heart is an experience that is hard to match. Institute tonight was awesome, as always, and I think more so tonight in particular because of the change I saw in the demeanor of Maritza tonight in comparison to the way she normally carries herself. I am going to continue to pray for her, she truly does seek after that which is true, and she is closer now than she ever before has been. If there is any time in her life that she needs the direction and guidance of the Lord, it is right now. I feel an odd peace come over me when I ponder on her future with the church, it almost seems as though there is no need for me to worry, the Lord is taking care of her. I do hope I am correct in this, it would bring me so much happiness and joy to see her partake of the blessings of the gospel. I yearn for it!

However, I heard a phrase used the other day that really bothered me. A close friend of mine was talking about "temple day" referring to the day in which one attends the temple. The term came up while we were talking about movies. He brought up the movie "The Producers" which I think is a great movie, freaking hilarious. Anyways, he mentioned that he loved the movie, but didn't feel as though it was appropriate to watch on "temple day." That got me thinking, why should "temple day" be any different from any other day of our life? We should feel as though we are clean and worthy enough to attend the temple any and every day shouldn't we? If we do things that we wouldn't do assuming we were going to the temple later that day, should we do those things in the first place?

Then I got wondering, how many other people in the church share that same sentiment? Because in all honesty that sentiment reminds me of nothing other than compromise and rationalization. Mindset has a lot to do with intent. In order to have the correct intent, regarding our honoring the gospel, we must have the correct mindset about what it takes to do so correctly, and we must be black and white about what is and what is not correct. There is no middle ground when it comes to the gospel, there are only 2 directions in life. Up, towards the Celestial Kingdom, or down, towards eternal and everlasting hell.

Pure Heart

2009-02-18T23:31:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 14:3-5

"He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

Surely he has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows; yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.

But he was wounded for out transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed."

So many thoughts, concerns, consternations, choices, going through my mind right now. Sometimes I just wish that life could be simpler, that all of the right answers were right there in front of us. And yet, they are, but we have to discern which answer is the right one and which ones are either of the devil, or are "less right." That is where the Lord comes in to play. The weight of one's future can destroy a person if they let it. How merciful and loving the Lord is. Every pain, every sorrow, every offense, every negative emotion we have felt, Christ has also felt that. He truly has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows. So why can't we let him continue to do so? He begs us to let him do that for us. And in doing so, we create a bond, a relationship with him that only brings us closer to him. Letting Christ help us make our choices takes much of the pressure off of us, as well as the fact that letting him be a part of our decision making process will most definitely give us a higher chance of making the correct decision (based on how well we listen and follow through).

But why is it that some choices we make seem to weigh on our souls so heavily that we can't seem to let Christ help? Why is it that we still feel as though we're alone on certain decisions, or that his help isn't valid, or isn't enough? Why is it that when we think we've come to a decision on something after seeking the guidance of the Lord, and then that decision doesn't turn out to be what we thought it would be, are we so quick to judge and to blame and to feel sorry for ourselves? Maybe the Lord is trying our faith to make sure that we are as committed as we claim to be? Maybe he makes it seem as though things aren't going to work out, but in reality if we just push through the difficult and seemingly insurmountable odds, the decision we came to will actually turn out to be what we hoped it would be. There definitely are a plethora of historical situations that support that last hypothesis. Maybe there is something that needs to change about us that will make something possible that would otherwise seem impossible, and the Lord keeps it that way until we do change.

The Lords ways are so hard to understand, yet they are so simple at the same time. If we truly live the gospel, every tiny tid bit of it, then nothing will ever defeat us because we will always have the strength and guidance of the Lord, and the comfort of the Holy Spirit. It is when we sin, or when we forget who we are that we let ourselves get feeling down, or feel defeated, or feel inadequate. We are sons and daughters of God. Nothing will ever, nothing CAN ever take that away from us. And with that we are entitled to so many blessings and such heavenly support that makes believing anything contrary an obvious farce.

And it all begins and ends with clean hands and a pure heart. After that, everything else follows.

The Sabbath

2009-02-17T23:34:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 13:18

"But the seventh day, the sabbath of the Lord thy God, thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy man-servant, nor they maid-servant, nor they cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates;"

In my old[er] age I have come to appreciate the sabbath day. It really is a day to relax, reflect, enjoy the company of my family, and draw closer to the Lord. There are plenty of other days that I can spend working, watching sports, participating in recreational activities, and so forth. The Lord made our bodies to need a period of rejuvination, and sleep is not enough. That seventh day of the week rejuvinates more than just the body, but also the soul and the spirit. Not to mention it qualifies you for the blessings that the Lord gives you for obeying his commandments.

"There is a law irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated- And when we obtain any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated."

So, is there any point in your life that you have said to yourself "I don't feel like being blessed today, I don't need the Lord's blessings to help me with this." Is that not what we're doing when we intentionally disobey the Lord? We're telling him that we don't want or need his help, because when we disobey him, we are denying ourselves the opportunity of accepting his blessings. Is that not a form of pride? If the blessings we receive are only given to us by obeying the laws of God, and we receive specific blessings by obeying specific laws, then it stands for reason that if we repeatedly disobey one certain law of the gospel, that we will repeatedly not receive certain blessings no matter how hard we pray and ask for them.

That may be all fine and dandy if you don't like receiving blessings. Things like obeying the law of tithing and it saving us from burning at the last days, you know, small stuff like that. Or that if we forgive other people their trespasses against us, we will receive the same from the Lord. It follows closely along the lines of something called a "principle with a promise." The principle is that we should obey the commandments and the laws of the gospel. The promise is that he will bless us. That reminds me of a scripture in Mosiah, quoting King Benjamin:

"And now, in the first place, he hath created you, and granted unto you your lives, for which ye are indebted unto him. And secondly, he doth require that ye should do as he hath commanded you; for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast?"

He immediately blesses us. Also, that scripture doesn't say "he blesses you if he feels like it." No, he keeps his end of the bargain, always. That is how much he loves us and how forgiving he is of his children. How can we not trust in him? How can we know what he asks of us, and what he promises us if we simply obey and trust him, and then turn around and disobey him? How can we reject his blessings? How blessed would our lives be if we learned to tune into the spirit and let him guide our every thought, deed, and action? If we remembered him in all things that we do, and in every decision we make, small and large?

And that brings me back to the subject I first mentioned: The Sabbath Day. How is it that the general Christian world can read Luke 23:56 (And they returned, and prepared spices and ointments; and rested the sabbath day according to the commandment.") as well as the other myriad of scriptures on the topic, and still feel justified in working on Sundays? Is that really the best way we have of taking advantage of the one day per week that the Lord has asked us to set aside for spiritual and physical rejuvination? And to carry it one step further, is one day out of our week too much for the Lord to ask? I mean, after all, he is only our Father, the dude who created us, the one that blesses us, the one that loves us more than anyone else, and so forth. I suppose I can give him at LEAST: 1/10th of my earnings, 1 of my 7 days in a week, a daily feast from his scriptures, and so forth. I don't think that is too much to ask in return for, you know, my existence, my free agency, the countless blessings I have received in life, and so forth.

So when Sunday rolls around on the calendar again, take some time to thank the Lord for everything you have (literally, seriously, try writing down everything that you have been blessed with in life, it will amaze you), and rest from your normal weekly routine. If you have a job that forces you to work on Sundays, pray about that job and how important that specific job is to you in your life versus some other alternatives you may have. Even jobs that require you to work from home... is that really honoring the sabbath day? And if it's not, is that act worth denying yourself the blessings of keeping the sabbath day holy? Is any measure of disobedience worth denying ourselves the blessings of our Father?

Emmaus

2009-02-16T23:59:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 12:27

"Ye have not applied your hearts to understanding; therefore, ye have not been wise. Therefore, what teach ye this people?"

I can't help but wonder how the apostles didn't recognize the Savior while they walked together on the road to Emmaus. They had seen him three days prior, so he had to have looked more than just slightly different in his resurrected and perfect body for them to not know who he was. I can't imagine the internal pain I would feel if Jesus Christ was standing next to me, and I didn't recognize him. And I've never even met the guy here on earth! Those apostles must have been sick to their stomachs! I do hope that if I am still on the earth when he comes again, that I will recognize him. But how could I? We have no pictures of him that are accurate. We have no descriptions of his distinct physical features (other than the holes in his hands and feet... which in reality.. are pretty disctintive haha, but those men didnt recognize him despite those details, so why would I think that I would be able to?).

I heard recently that we learn physical things physically, and spiritual things spiritually. That struck me when I heard it because it makes a lot of sense. To gain a testimony of the Book of Mormon, we need a witness from the spirit that it is true. Reading it as a historical document and simply looking for facts wont prove anything about it to you. But since the book is a spiritual one, to understand and to know it you have to have that spiritual witness. Much like the spirit wont tell you that 2+2=4.. that is simply a physical fact. I imagine it will be much the same when Christ comes again as far as recognizing him. I won't be able to rely on my eyes or any of my senses that I am beholding the Christ, I will have to be able to recognize the promptings of my spirit because my spirit sure will recognize who he is! Just as they said in Luke: "Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures?" Their spirits certainly recognized who it was walking with them, even if their perceptions did not.

And really, is it not the same with us in all things, every day? We go through life relying on our eyes, our ears, our hands, and so forth. But often times (far more than we ought to) we neglect the promptings and whisperings of the spirit. An experience that follows closely to this (to a small degree) actually happened to me today. I was leaving Hobby Lobby and was about to head towards my car when a guy in an SUV pulled up and asked me if I wanted some stereos. I thought to myself that it seemed at least worth looking into, so I let him keep talking. He pulled his car into a parking spot and opened up his trunk and showed me the stereos. He was wearing a Genesis (the company that makes the speakers he was delivering) shirt and told me that whoever had loaded his vehicle must have looked at the order wrong and gave him an extra set of speakers to deliver that weren't ordered. However, if he went back to work with the extra speakers, his boss would simply keep them and the mistake would never go noticed by the mother company or whatever. So this guy figured that instead of take the chance of his boss getting the free stuff, he would try to offer it to random people he ran into on his way back to work in hopes that they would give him something in return (I assume monetary compensation). Before he even finished his story, I had the strangest sensation come over me that this guy had probably stolen these things, or that his story wasnt 100% factual and that there was more to it that he was leading on. So instead of even entertaining the thought of "so what, it's not like I'm ever going to get tracked if I buy these off of him," I simply told him that I wasn't interested and went about my way. Something just did not feel right about the situation, but it was nothing that he said, or that I saw, or anything of the sort. I do believe that it was the spirit whispering me to not even get involved and to let this man go on about his day.

Sure that can be chalked up to having a "conscience" or what have you, but it was more meaningful than the notion to "keep the commandments and dont sin" type of urging. We all know what it feels like to debate within ourselves about whether or not to tell a lie, to cover up something we shouldn't have done or to admit it, and so forth. Those are the daily struggles we have, and we don't need to be told what goes on inside of us when those come up. This seemed to be a bit more. It was more of a "don't even think about hearing this guy out, nothing good can possibly come of it" type of prompting. And that was unmistakably the spirit talking to me.

I imagine that being in tune with the promptings of the spirit more often than not is going to be a life long process. But one that will certainly be worth it. Because really, aren't we spirits trapped inside of a body after all? Let's let our spirits do the talking and the walking for once. It'll sure be interesting to see where it leads us.

Psych

2009-02-15T23:06:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 11:25

"And except they repent in sackcloth and ashes, and cry mightily to the Lord their God, I will not hear their prayers, neither will I deliver them out of their afflictions; and thus saith the Lord, and thus hath he commanded me."

Well, there certainly is no turning back now... I have been released as the pianist for my ward since I will only be there 3 more weeks, and they need time to get another pianist in place and comfortable with the routine. That calling brought me a lot of joy, I really had fun providing the music for our ward. Now I am simply the choir director, and after our next performance (probably my last week there) I will be released from that as well. I am going to severely miss my singles ward in Colleyville, I have grown so much, learned so much, matured so much, and really become whom I desire to be over the last year with the help of that ward.

Anyhow, so I believe I have finally made up my mind as far as what I want to study at school, and for the first time in a long while, I am honestly excited about my future education! I have always been curious as to what makes people do the things they do, why they think the way they think, what motivates one person versus another person, and so forth. In addition, I always find myself trying to help people emotionally, spiritually, mentally, etc.. wherever I'm able to. Whether it be listening to someone's internal struggles, their outward struggles, questions they ponder and whatnot, and I honestly find myself caring about their situtation each and every time. I'm not always successful in helping everyone, but it is something that I honestly love doing and I usually have some measure of helpfullness to a situation whether it be a momentary lifting of spirits, or an actual answer to their problem. So, I think with a church-based education and guidance, I will be better able to do that which I love: helping people. Therefore my intended major is going to be psychology.

And honestly, I doubt I would let myself major in psychology anywhere other than BYU. There are just so many opinions and "scientific facts" out there that say one thing when human nature (whether the facts support it or not) is simply not what a lot of experts say it is. Psychological instruction without direction of God (you know, our literal Father) is really just guess work when you really break it down. That is why I look forward to receiving spiritual instruction on the subject, because that is how I try to base my life and the advice/help that I currently offer to those in need.

In addition, being well versed in psychology opens up so many doors career-wise. Even if I do end up going down the path of a Chick-fil-A operator, having a psychology background will help me run my store better as far as keeping morale high and maintaining quality employees. And if I don't end up sticking with Chick-fil-A, psychology is one profession that wont be low in demand for a long time to come if ever. I feel really good about this, I am completely stoked!

Yeah...

2009-02-15T01:05:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 10:14

"And his brethren were wroth with him because they understood not the dealings of the Lord; they were also wroth with him upon the waters because they hardened their hearts against the Lord."

I had a great idea as what to blog about tonight, but on account that it is as late as it is, and I have to wake up as early as I do, and because it would take me forever to write the blog I intended to write... I leave my journal entry thusly...

I had a very long week at work this past week. 47+ hours (including being called in early twice, and switching things around to go in late once), fairly stressful situations that I did not want to be in which I could not avoid, lots and lots of busy-ness, and none of it really seemed to flow or make any sense considering how things usually go. That being said, it was a great learning experience and I think weeks like this last one will teach me how to be not only a better leader, but a better person. Things I could have said or done differently, situtations that I could have prepared better for, conversations I will better avoid in the future. Not saying that Chick-fil-A will always be my career of choice, and that every week helps me develop that future, but I try to apply non-work principles to things that take place at work, whenever I can. I find that even in small examples, life-long lessons can be extracted and held dear. I just hope I can remember the lessons I've learned without having to repeat them...

I am a gamer

2009-02-13T23:47:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 9:18

"And God did hear our cries and did answer our prayers; and we did go forth in his might..."

I often wonder how long I am going to keep this journal/blog going. I know what inspired it and the benefit it has had in my life, but I know that I can't do this every night.. forever! (Or can I?) It would have to be a GOOD reason, one that I would feel good about. Obviously if I went on a mission that would be a worthy reason. Would marriage suffice? I really don't know. I digress...

So, I have recently been VERY tempted to start gaming again, specifically an MMORPG. I logged into one that I used to play because I received a free week or so of game play, and a few of my gaming friends still play. I pretty much had myself convinced that I was going to return to gaming because I rationalized "I'm a different person now, I can do this in moderation." But then I got to thinking, and praying... Really? Can I? I'm not the type of person that, when I'm doing something I really enjoy, does it to anything less than the best of my abilities. The same goes with gaming, which is why at one point it controlled and took over my life. When it comes to gaming, I am a power gamer. Even on Rock Band, when the singing part doesn't really matter as far as the difficulty you play it on, I do expert simply for the challenge and because it just might be impressive to someone else (and to myself as well!). Single player games are slightly different, but that's not the issue at hand. When it comes to online games that numerous people play, simultaneously, and therefore compete against each other, the "uber leetness" comes out, even in the best of people. That's how they make their money and how they get people hooked. They create a setting that allows people to compete against eachother, and it just grows and builds from there.

So I finally realized, after telling myself that I could, then couldn't, then could, then couldn't, etc.. that even if I could, are there not better things I could do with my time? If I did play, I would most likely play past the hour I want to go to bed, it would interrupt conversations I may want to have with people, and it would most definitely get a higher priority than piano. Not playing in general, but I would put less time into getting better at the piano, which when I look back at, I enjoy those results far more than I do the results of my "gaming achievements."

Now, this is not to say that everyone that plays mmo's is wasting their time and should be using their time more productively, this is simply for me. I would much rather see myself study the scriptures and study the piano for 3 hours, versus playing a game that benefits me in no way considering the future. There are uplifting and inspiring activities we can participate in that benefit us for the long run that are enjoyable, and even moreso enjoyable when you consider the "long run."

It really is a choice between "acceptable/ok/good" and "better."

And Beyond

2009-02-12T23:26:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 8:20

"O how marvelous are the works of the Lord, and how long doth he suffer with his people; yea, and how blind and impenetrable are the understandings of the children of men; for they will not seek wisdom, neither do they desire that she should rule over them!"

Today was an awesome day! Work called me in to help for 3 hours because one of our employees was sick and could not wortk, so I got 3 hours of overtime pay in, which really just means that I have more money to spend on a certain someone at a future point in time, hehe. Afterwards I came home and got ready for institute. Institute tonight was extra special because my long-time best friend Craig accepted my invitation for him to come. It seemed as though he really enjoyed the lesson, and even enjoyed the three games of volleyball that he played afterwards, though we lost every game haha. Oh well, it was fun anyhow.

Tonight's topic was on Celestial Marriage. I really can't wait to start making that progression. Though, really the progression starts now, with my own development. I didn't necessarily learn anything new tonight, but reaffirming words are always welcome, especially when they are about things that are near and dear to my heart. Working out my own worthiness and readiness for marriage is first and foremost on the progression towards that of Celestial Marriage, and ignoring that first step is the grossest offense I can make when it comes to my future wife.

I really can't wait to start my married life, I feel ready emotionally and spiritually. Plus, as my adulthood habits begin forming, I can see where I could really use the help of a woman that just so happens to love me and is willing to deal with my faults and shortcomings (and I, hers.. though we'll keep that a secret, my future wife is perfect and always will be). Though, all things in God's time. If things work out, they work out. If they don't, it's not the end of the world, and there will be someone else on down the road (not that I'm talking about anyone specifically at the moment, just talking). I really need to try to have God's perspective on things and not my temporal, flawed perspective. I think if I can achieve that, life will make more sense and be more fulfilling and happier. It's a daunting task to think about, but I don't think that it is impossible with God's help and guidance.

I pray every night for direction in my life concerning this subject (as well as its intertwining with a possible upcoming mission). I just hope that I can receive inspiration from God one of these times, and then have the fortitude to listen.

Leaving

2009-02-12T00:27:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 7:27

"And because he said unto them that Christ was the God, the Father of all things, and said that he should take upon him the image of man, and it should be the image after which man was created in the beinning; or in other words, he said that man was created after the image of God, and that God should come down among the children of men, and take upon him flesh and blood, and go forth upon the face of the earth-"

As each day grows closer to my moving day (yes I know it's still about 2 months off) I can't help but feel the need to rely on the Lord more and more for direction. There are still a number of things that I have worth staying for, things that would be completely acceptable substitutions for those that I am seeking up in Utah. I still would feel like a spiritual person, and would still be a temple-worthy holder of the Melchizedek Priesthood. I am in a good situtaion where I am, but I know grander things await me in Provo (and surrounding areas). What exactly they are? Well I'd like to think I have an idea, but the Lord often surprises you.

I could be thinking things will work out one way, but then something completely different and 100% opposite could happen, but it could still be for the better (comparing it to my current situtation in life). I guess I've just grown so accustomed to my current life and have such a wonderful feeling because this is how my life has been for a while now, and that while has consisted of my self-conversion to the Gospel of Christ. So why would I want to mess up the very thing that brought me back into God's fold? Because that's how we grow and become even better, even stronger, that's how we find out who we truly are. It would have been easy to choose Lucifer's plan and have all of our choices made for us, but we chose Jehovah's, and things are difficult, they're scary, but it's all worth it.

So, that's what I'm staring at, every day. I ponder it, I pray about it, I go back and forth about it. do I leave my current situtaion of: Living with my parents (I actually really love it); holding 2 amazing callings that I love (and if I were staying I would have a 3rd, that I would love equally); being in an awesome singles ward that has strengthened my testimony and brought me wonderful friends; being near all of my best friends; being near 2 great schools that either one is within decent driving distance that give amazing education (but are a tiny bit pricy); being in the job/career that I currently am in with awesome growth potential within my grasp if I simply stay put and continue to learn and grow; etc.

Do I leave that all behind for Utah? The answer is yes. And every time I ask, I feel at peace.

Chopin

2009-02-10T23:57:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 6:7

"And king Mosiah did cause his people that they should till the earth. And he also, himself, did till the earth, that thereby he might not become burdensome to his people, that he might do according to that which his father had done in all things. And there was no contention among all his people for the space of three years."

As I sit here and listen to Chopin's nocturnes, I can't help but wonder what is it about this music that inspires me and touches my soul. It relaxes me, clears my mind and my conscience, and just puts everything at ease. God has different ways of talking to His children, perhaps this is His way of getting to me.

The Nocturnes that really get to me are:

#1 in B Flat Minor

#2 in E Flat Major

#3 in B Major

#7 in C Sharp Minor

#9 in B Major

#15 in F Minor

C Sharp Minor (Posthumous)

In a few days or so, a book with all of the sheet music to his nocturnes will be arriving. I am so completely excited to start playing these songs. The anticipation is nearly palpable. My piano practicing and playing is going to start sounding very repetitive as I pretty much am only learning Chopin and Jon Schmidt at the moment. Though, you'll find no complaints from me! :)

Gossip

2009-02-09T23:50:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 5:7&13

"And now, because of the covenant which ye have made ye shall be called the children of Christ, his sons, and his daughters; for behold, this day he hath spiritually begotten you; for ye say that your hearts are changed through faith on his name; therefore, ye are born of him and have become his sons and his daughters."

"For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served, and who is a stranger unto him, and is far from the thoughts and intents of his heart?"

So, thanks to me not having to work today, I made the most of my time off and had a wonderful day! A few of my friends came over to play some Rock Band, and then we went frisbee golfing. It was fairly muddy, and got dark before we could finish, but it was a blast and we had a lot of fun bonding. And then from there, we went to FHE. WOOHOO! I finally, after being in this ward for nearly a year, got to go to FHE. Seriously was the first time I had the opportunity to do so thanks to my working schedule. But I suppose that I can't complain because they have been so willing to give me Thursday nights off so that I don't have to miss institute, which I love. And I'm glad I got to go tonight, because even though I don't consdier myself a gossiper, we all are to some extent, and we could all use a self-examination in the way we talk about others. As you probably guessed, tonight's FHE lesson was on gossip.

As one of the missionaries tonight put it, "gossip is the first sign of self apostasy." That is so profound. The only reason people might gossip is because their heart is not in the right place, not the heart, or whatever else, of the person being spoken about. Gossip can come in all shapes and sizes. For example (using fictitous names and situations):

"Did you hear that Marsha is pregnant?"

"Look at what Steve is wearing to church, ugh."

"Did you hear that Brian took Stephanie out on Monday, and then Karlie out on Tuesday? What a player."

"Did you hear that Lindesy's husband can't seem to hold a job down? It's looking really bleak for them."

"I don't think he should be our Bishop, I've heard that his family life is in shambles."

"I heard that Mark was in jail not too long ago, you should probably be careful around him."

If you really take a moment to pause, and ponder, do those things not sound like a fairly normal part of a conversation? Yet every single one of those statements is designed to accent negative qualities, or assume negative things. Even if every single one of the statements presented is fact, it is still not our place to discuss them, let alone share an opinion. My opinion as to why (referring to the previous examples):

Marsha may be pregnant, but so what? It is not our business to spread that news around to others, those that need to know will undoubtedly know, and the person you are telling will either find out through normal means (Marsha or her family informing that person), or won't find out and her life will not be any more fulfilled or deprived because she did not know that fact.

Steve might not be wearing the most appropirate dress to church, but again, so what? That is between him and the Lord. He might not have a suit, or anything resembling a suit, and might not have the money to purchase such an outfit, or the means to acquire one. Now surely someone in the ward would be more than willing to loan him a suit or two until he is able to get one of his own. So, if that is the case, why not be that person, or help him find someone to loan him a suit that fits as opposed to saying negative, insulting comments about his current situation or appearance. It wouldn't be hard, or awkward depending on how you start the conversation, to find out the reason he is dressed the way he is dressed, withouth judging him.

Brian's story is a classic example of gossip. Does it really matter if Brian went on 2 dates with 2 different girls on back to back nights? No. It is simply idle conversation that has no value or worth to anyone, least of all the person you are telling. If someone were to say this to me, I hope that I would have the wherewithall to respond "So what? Mind your own business and stay out of his."

Maybe Lindsey's husband is going through a trial in his life and is doing everything he can to hold down a job, but the opportunity that is best for his family simply hasn't arrived yet. This statement, while on the surface seems like a friendly comment, has an underlying message. When the phrase "seem to" is used, it automatically is your opinion and is not fact. A better way to say this might be "Lindsey's husband hasn't been able to find a job yet, things look bleak, maybe there's something we can do to help." Is that not a much more valuable statement? That sentence shows much more love and kinship than the first example. I'll get back to that later.

A bishop's, or anyone else's, family life is none of our business. Again, this is a classic example of idle conversation that is intended to do nothing but break someone down, not to build them up. If the bishop's family life has any bearing on his ability to be your bishop, the church will take care of it, and even then, it is none of your business. That statement is not one of concern, but of accusation and judgement. A much more wholesome sentence might look like this: "I hear the bishop's family life is in shambles, I hope things turn out for the best, maybe we can take them some cookies to cheer them up." If you find yourself saying something negative, or even referring to a negative situtation (as the beginning of sentence number 2 starts), should we not find it within ourselves to help that situtation become a positive, or at least less of a negative, in whatever capactiy we are able?

Mark being in jail certainly was a terrible experience for him. And the statement about being careful around him may seem like good advice on the surface, because who knows if he can be trusted? But I'm glad I ended with this sentence, I think it sums everything up well. Mark may have done something terrible to deserve going to jail, or it might have been something small. Whatever put him there, it's over and done with and Mark is who Mark is. But if we treat Mark as though he's the same person that put him in jail, it will serve to do nothing but stunt his ability to change and to become a better person. A better way to talk about Mark might be: "I heard that Mark was in jail, we should extend a hand of friendship to let him know that he is still loved as a person and always welcome." Wow! What a different view on a person! If everyone did that, do you think Mark would be more apt to change his behavior for the better, as opposed to everyone avoiding him and judging him for something he did in the past?

Is that not one of the points of our existence here on earth? To lift eachother and to bear eachother's burdens? To extend hands of friendship and kindness and to have the image of Christ on our countenances? I didn't realize until know that the scripture I chose actually applies to this topic. The final sentence states: "For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served, and who is a stranger unto him, and is far from the thoughts and intents of his heart?" How can we possibly know our master, our God, if our thoughts and the intents of our heart are far from his? God would never speak ill of those people, but instead would find any way He could of lifting them and bringing out the best in them despite what their current circumstance might be. So if we are not the same way, how can we expect to recognize someone that we don't serve. For if we are not that way, we are not serving God, but we are serving satan. Satan wants us to speak ill, or heck, even to speak idly of people, because that is how societies and groups start breaking down, from within.

I am by no means perfect on this topic, and I have much work to do. Probably more than I even realize. I hope that I can remember the things I have typed in this blog tonight on a day to day basis, I really might read this at the beginning of each day to help myself remember what a good perspective is versus an idle or a negative perspective. As Brother Elmer says, how do we "be ye therefore perfect?" By being just a little bit better each day, and having a lot of days.

Not much ado

2009-02-08T23:43:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 4:26-27

"And now, for the sake of these things which I have spoken unto you - that is, for the sake of retaining a remission of your sins from day to day, that ye may walk guiltless before God - I would that ye should impart of your substance to the poor, every man according to that which he hath, such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick and administering to their relief, both spiritually and temporally, according to their wants.

And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."

Well, I turned down a calling in the church for the first time today! But it's not as bad as it sounds. It was a calling I would've LOVED to have had, but I had to turn it down because I'm moving in 2 months and it just didn't make sense. (Brother Johnson agreed that it should go to someone else after finding out I was leaving.) The calling was Institute Secretary. My love for institute is widely known, and anything I could've done to help in any way with institute, I would've absolutely loved! Oh well, maybe I'll get to be directly involved with institute up at BYU.

Comfort

2009-02-07T23:48:00.002-06:00

Mosiah 3:19

"For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father."

Playing the piano is so therapeutic for me. It brings such peace and joy to my soul. Maybe that's why I like playing Chopin so much. His music is so moving, so relaxing, so comforting. I could listen to his nocturnes, his waltzes, his mazurkas, his preludes, his polonaises, all of it, for hours on end and just feel amazing. When I play Chopin's music, I literally am in tune with the music, it just makes sense to me and I love it.

I am so glad that I know the truth of things. That I don't have questions about the gospel as far as its basics are concerned. I look at the lifes of those around me and how confused and lost they seem on ocassion, not just as far as their life direction goes, but as to the purpose in life and whom they really are. It is so comforting and brings me such joy and happiness that I can sit back, reflect on my life, and literally see the hand of God in my life, and see His plan of happiness take action in my life. I just hope that I can live worthily of His presence in my life every day.

Thank You

2009-02-07T01:35:00.003-06:00

Mosiah 2:41

"And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of neverending happiness. O remember, remember that these things are true; for the Lord God hath spoken it."

Sorry again for the late blog, but my father and I just had a good discussion, and I figured it was worth not interrupting that when I know I could just do my blog later. So here I am, blogging.

So, I called the Chick-fil-A up in Orem to see about job opportunities up there (I do still intend, at this point, to make a career out of Chick-fil-A and operate my own store one day). Turns out the operator of that store was indeed there, and able to talk. His name is Terry and he seems like a great guy. He seemed very interesting in meeting me and seeing about ways I could help out his store and is having me submit a formal application via email whenever I get the chance to. Methinks that will be happening on Sunday, yay.

I am so incredibly blessed. I sit and think about the people in my life right now, and I can't thank Heavenly Father enough for putting me in the situation I am in right now. My parents are simply amazing, I don't think 2 people can raise a child better than I have been raised. They have done more than raise me, they have mentored me (when I allow them to), they are always there when I need them (even if my car is broken down outside Waco's city limits and it's near midnight), they let me live my life and grow in ways that I need to grow (sometimes I wish they hadn't haha), and they are such shining examples of faith, love, charity, endurance, and hope. That was a really long sentence, but they deserve it!

The singles ward that I am in right now has been amazing. I have loved it, and I hate that I will have to leave them in March. I have learned so much in my almost-year there. Bishop Vanderpool truly is a man of God, as well as President Manion. Those men have helped guide my life more than they will ever know. I have loved my callings in the ward: Ward Pianist and Ward Choir Director. I really have grown a lot in my musical taste and appreciation from being the choir director. It scared the jeebies out of me when I was first called, but I got used to it, and have really enjoyed it. I probably could do a better job as the ward pianist, but I absolutely love playing the hymns, I feel such a strong spirit as I play the piano while the ward sings along. Nothing can replace that. The sunday school classes that I have taken have done so much for my gospel knowledge. Harvey, Nathan, and Anson are such great teachers. I can't remember enjoying any church class as much as I have enjoyed these last 2 semesters of Sunday School. Nor can I recall learning as much.

The friends I have made in the singles ward here (excluding those I knew before) also have done so much for my life. Natalia, Jimmy, Anthony, Ally, Chris, Keisha, and so many more. I am so glad to have the friendship of such wonderful people. The youth of the church truly does have strength in numbers, we lift eachother, we sustain eachother, we bear eachother's burdens, we are of one spirit and one goal in servitude and love. I have made friendships here that will last throughout my lifetime and beyond.

Institute. If there is any moment of my week that I can't wait until it comes around again, it is institute. I feel the spirit so strongly there. Brother and Sister Elmer are wonderful people. They are the prime example of what it means to magnify your calling. I have taken numerous institute classes in the past whether it be in Lubbock, Denton or even previous classes here in Colleyville. None of them even come close to the Elmer's classes. I honestly get giddy as I pull into church on Thursday nights. My testimony has grown so much from institute, I can't even imagine where I would be today spiritually if it were not for Thursday nights. I am going to miss it so, so much.

Chick-fil-A in Lake Worth. Without question this has been my favorite job of all of my past jobs, other Chick-fil-A's included. It is going to be so hard for me to leave. I have grown so much as a person there, with the responsibilities I have there and the personal accountability that exists there, all within a wonderful pressure-free work environment. It is awesome. The culture that Mike has grown in that store makes me happy to come to work every day. I hope that I can emulate this store when and if I open my own Chick-fil-A. The friends that I have made at work also have been simply awesome. Maritza, Jordan, Beth, Megan, Holly, John David, Andrew, Ben, Travis, Misty, Garrett, and so on. I honestly have gained 2 siblings from this Chick-fil-A. Megan really is the little sister I never had, as well as Garrett is the little brother I wish I'd had. Those 2 people bless my lives daily, and I don't think they even realize it. It's going to be so hard to leave them all behind. A piece of me will always be there with them.

My friends that have been my friends forever. Stephen, Craig, Brock, JB. I suppose this will simply be another chapter to our rollercoaster of friendship. I will miss the proximity we share right now. But I have to take a moment to think on the blessings I have received from our friendship. Countless laughing fits, the warmth of a smiling face, baseball games, six flags, movies, kindergarten, dungeons and dragons, ddo, ddr, rides to school, tornado terry's, peter pan, and so much more. I can't think of better friends, but life moves forward.

My siblings are constant sources of love and wisdom. I have been so blessed to be able to see the choices my brother and sisters have made, and see how their lives have been blessed. I hope that I can make the same choices and reap the same benefits. I don't deserve the amount of love that my siblings have given to me, but that's what family is for right?! haha. I hope each and every one of them knows just how much I love them and look up to them. I thank God every day for my family. Even my nieces and nephews are such inspirations to me. The choices I see Mary making now that she is in young women's, I am so glad that she has such a strong spirit and has such a love and knowledge of the gospel. She is going to be such a beautiful woman one day, in every way. All of my nieces and nephews have such wonderful quatlities, it would take me forever to list them all. I love being an uncle, and I love seeing them grow and blossom, it is going to be hard to move away from Mary and Kaelyn (and their parents! haha), but I'm sure I'll see them often enough to not feel too left out of their lives.

And last, but not least, there is a certain someone that doesn't like being mentioned, so I won't. But I'd be doing her a disservice if I didn't include her in this list I have going here. She is so talented, so beautiful, so sweet, so caring, so thoughtful, so intelligent, so pure in heart, I could go on and on. I am truly blessed to be associated with her in any way. I could compare her to any summer day, and she would top it every time. I look forward to getting to know her better, I'm sure the better I get to know her, the more she will bless my life. And hopefully I'll find ways to return the favor.

I can't help but thank God every night for the place that I'm in right now. My life is truly wonderful. I hope that it just gets better from here as I add schooling and more career progression, and whatever else awaits me down the road. God has a plan for His children, and He loves us enough to bless us constantly.

"And behold also, if I, whom ye call your king, who has spent his days in your service, and yet has been in the service of God, do merit any thanks from you, O how you ought to thank your heavenly King!"

Hope & BYU

2009-02-05T23:42:00.004-06:00

Mosiah 1:7

"And now, my sons, I would that ye should remember to search them diligently, that ye may profit thereby; and I would that ye should keep the commandments of God, that ye may propser in the land according to the promises which the Lord made unto our fathers."

Ah, Thursdays. Love 'em. Institute always makes my day. Tonight we discussed Elder Uchtdorf's talk about hope. Such a wonderful topic. But first, to the matter of the day. I finally paid off the money that I owed UNT, and in turn was handed a transcript, finally. After which I started and finished my application to BYU with the intent to attend the spring and summer semesters. I still hope to serve a mission sooner than later, but there is no reason to continue putting off my education when BYU is the one school that will hold any scholarship I may receive for the duration of my mission (which is the main reason I have been reluctant to go back to school lately). And if I don't end up serving a mission, then I won't be looking back at lost time with regret. All I have left to do is send off my transcripts and get my ecclesiastical recommendation back from the bishop/stake president. Utah in April, here I come!

Now, to the topic of hope. hope is such a wonderful gospel principle. But just like any other gospel principle, it works one step at a time. Just like revelation and faith, when we show that we are able to be trusted with small amounts, the Lord will bless us with more. The same holds true with hope. The more hope we show in our daily lives, the more blessings the Lord will give us so that we can be even more hopeful for the future. The more we understand the blessings of the atonement and the plan of salvation, the more hope we will have in things that sustain us daily.

I brought up a point in class tonight that when people hope, they generally only hope for positive and uplifting things. And that when we are hoping for such things we tend to think about them. If we are thinking about positive things, then our demeanor tends to reflect that and we tend to smile more, laugh more, love more. That leads to continual happiness, and happiness is infectious. So really, why shouldn't we keep a positive outlook of hope about us always? When I said that, Brother Elmer related it to a statement he once heard. A thought will produce an action, actions produce habits, habits produce character, and our character will determine our eternal destiny.

So really, we are creatures of what we think about, things that occupy our minds. And if hope continuously occupies our mind, we have nowhere to but up. Because if we are always hopeful, then we never let despair enter into our thoughts. And if despair never crosses our mind, even when we sin or get distracted, then we will never let ourselves get caught up in the wiles and strategies of Satan. Satan wants us to get ourselves down, to sin and then feel hopeless, like we have no way out of the situtation we are currently in. If he keeps us in that cycle, we will stay there indefinitely and our lives will become unproductive, isolated, and caustic. But, with hope, we are always looking towards a better tomorrow, a better way of life, a better result than we have previously known. Hope leads to good works, and we learn to cultivate that hope one step at a time, one day at a time.

So, when times seem rough, if we can just remember to stay hopeful for a better tomorrow, hopeful for the support of loved ones and especially for the support and love of God, then there is no limit to the happiness we can experience in this life.

His will

2009-02-04T23:38:00.002-06:00

Words of Mormon 1:7

"And I do this for a wise purpose; for thus it whispereth me, according to the workings of the Spirit of the Lord which is in me. And now, I do not know all things; but the Lord knoweth all things which are to come; wherefore, he worketh in me to do according to his will."

Oh, that I could have that much faith in my own faith. I think one of the things that holds us back the most in life is our own self doubt. We don't believe that we really can do great things, whether it be spiritual based or temporal, and when we don't believe that, then we're right. For example, if Moses didn't believe that he could actually part the Red Sea, he simply wouldn't have requested the Lord perform such a miracle through him. Such is the same with us. If we don't believe that we can make the best choice in our life with His guidance, we won't really ask for His help. The Lord looks on our heart, and no matter what words we may say, if our heart isn't truly behind those words, they are for naught. Just think of all of the wonderful blessings and guidance the Lord is waiting to give us if we will just truly believe that He can and that He will!

Thoughts like that are what make me really understand just how deep the Gospel goes, and how much it is a player in our every day lives. From our thoughts, to our words, to our desires, to our basic instincts. But as I have grown in the Gospel lately, I have found out for myself that the more I give myself to the Lord (see the list within the last sentence) the more rewarded I have been, the more direction I have received in my life, the happier and more peaceful my life has become. The more guidance I have sought while not being impatient, the more guidance I have received, albeit on His time table. Which really, His time table is the one that I should try to pattern my own time table after, so why should I get upset if things don't happen when I desire or expect them to? I hope to think and understand in the same manner that God does, so why shouldn't I get used to that line of thinking now, and start now trying to understand an eternal perspective as opposed to a temporal one? It seems like a daunting task, but it also seems worth taking it a day at a time trying to adjust to it.

One Way Street

2009-02-04T00:44:00.003-06:00

Omni 1:26

"And now, my beloved brethren, I would that ye should come unto Christ, who is the Holy One of Israel, and partake of his salvation, and the power of his redemption. Yea, come unto him, and offer your whole souls as an offering unto him, and continue in fasting and praying, and endure to the end; and as the Lord liveth ye will be saved."

Oh so many paths in life, so many of them good, but which one is right? The most right. Which one will bring me the MOST happiness? Which risks will pay off and which ones won't? Ah, as Amy said I really have come to the crossroads in life. I am glad I have the direction of the Lord, but even now I need to humble myself to wait for the answers to these questions when HE is ready to let me know and not when I think that I should know. That's the frustrating part, but I know that once I do receive the answers I am looking for, it will be far more decisive than it otherwise would have been, and therefore that much better and clearer.

The life I have led for the last year has brought me many blessings, and it has been wonderful. And now I am looking to break that routine, but hopefully I will be replacing it with an even better routine. That's the scary part, but that's the part where the guidance of the Lord will have the most play. I just want to fastforward a month and a half and be done with it! Why can't life be so simple?

Today I felt something in a way I've never felt it before. And then after work, a simple phone call took all of those feelings away. I don't doubt they will come back tomorrow, and that cycle will repeat itself for a long while to come. But it is something both wonderful and scary and exciting all at once. I can't help but smile and cry on the inside at the same time.

Wish me luck!

Tears

2009-02-02T23:56:00.002-06:00

Jarom 1:4

"And there are many among us who have many revelations, for they are not all stiffnecked. And as many as are not siffnecked and have faith, have communion with the Holy Spirit, which maketh manifest unto the children of men, according to their faith."

Well, I am back in Texas, so I suppose it is about time to recap. This morning was amazing. I got to go through the Draper Temple (open house) and see the beautiful rooms inside with Aunt Taunia and Rachel. It's the second temple in which I've had the privilege of attending the open house, the first being the Manhattan Temple a few years ago. There really is a different feeling inside, even before it is dedicated. I can not wait to get endowed and start receiving even more temple blessings. Ideally I will have that done before the year's end. I am so stoked at that possibility.

Shortly after that, it was time to leave Utah, and say good bye. That was one of the hardest things I've had to do in a long, long time. I honestly did not want to go. And as I sit here and type, I wish I were still there. That really was one of the best, if not THE best, weekends of my life. I didn't want it to end, knowing that I would have to fly home. But, the best things in life aren't easy, they take struggle and growth, and this will be no different.

Some times, there are choices in life that are hard to make, and we find ourselves tempted to make the wrong decision, even when we know without a doubt what we should be doing. It is in those moments that we need to humble ourselves and swallow our pride. We are not on this earth to be tested about what we want our lives to become, we are here to be tested and see if we will pattern our lives after Christ's design for us. To see if we can make spiritual and celestial decisions, in a carnal and temporal world. To see if we can look at a choice with spiritual eyes, and from a spiritual perspective, with faith and trust in Christ as opposed to faith and trust in mankind, and often times not even faith and trust in ourselves. For we can only be so strong, we can only be so wise, we can only be so pure if we rely on our own abilities and wisdom. But when we pair our desires with the strength, wisdom, and holiness of God, THAT is when we are really able to accomplish things.

"But with God, all things are possible." I think that statement has more to do with just events in our lives. Things such as being calm in a stressful time, building a boat, etc. But it also has to do with mastering ourselves. Many people think that in order to master our own self, we can only rely on our own abilities. Well, we are flawed creatures. We can not possibly think that we can master ourselves by ourself, that is a fallacy. It takes the divine inspiration of God, and faith that He will guide us to be able to gain spiritual wisdom and eternal attributes. "All things are possible" refers to such things as tough choices in life that may negatively affect people we care about, yet are the right thing to do. Things such as changing habits for the better, daily/weekly/monthly commitments that only we know about, and so forth. It refers to any thing that is for our eternal betterment. He wants what is best for us, and so with His guidance, anything great or small, personal or widespread, important or frivolous, is possible if we put our trust in Him as opposed to relying on our own strength and wisdom.

"For behold, this is my work and my glory - to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man."

Technical Difficulties

2009-02-02T14:18:00.004-06:00

Enos 1:12, 15

"And it came to pass that after I had prayed and labored with all diligence, the Lord said unto me: I will grant unto thee according to thy desires, because of they faith

...I cried unto him continually, for he had said unto me: Whatsoever thing ye shall ask in faith, believing that ye shall receive in the name of Christ, ye shall receive it."

Well, so I didn't have time to blog last night due to being... busy. However, I am posting today to make up for last night in spirit of the "daily" commitment I have made. Although, due to lack of time, this is going to be very short.

I really enjoyed the Super Bowl party last night (except for the part where the Steelers won) mainly because it was great to bond with the Lombardi family which I have not seen in far too long. I have really come to appreciate the bonds of family over the last year or so, and this weekend has been no exception. I look forward to starting my own family and my own family traditions, I can't think of a greater blessing than the blessing of a family.

Utah part 2

2009-02-01T01:53:00.003-06:00

Jacob 7:12

"...wherefore, I know if there should be no atonement made all mankind must be lost."

Today was, simply put, awesome. Thoroughly Modern Millie was a thoroughly entertaining play, and was very, very long as well. Though it was well worth the time investment. Jon Schmidt was, simply amazing. He was funny, entertaining, and such a humble guy. I really enjoyed the way he went about his concert. He didn't draw the attention to himself as most performers do, but chose to direct our appreciation for music towards other people. In my estimation that is the sign of a truly humble person. He knows he's talented, he knows we know he's talented (we did after all pay money to see him perform), and thusly he knows that he has no need to draw any further attention to himself. I hope that I can develop that kind of humility. That is one quality that I do struggle with on a day to day basis. I suppose it comes from a lack of confidence for the most part, which means that the confidence that I do show every so often, isn't always so sincere. I suppose it will simply be a matter of time and prayer.

I am looking forward to tomorrow so much, I can not WAIT to see "music and the spoken word" as well as to join in the festivities at Taunia's house. I have not seen them in forever, and I really miss the close bond that I once had with the Lombardi family. They are wonderful people, I feel honored to have them as family. I am not sure how that Taunia and Trista truly understand how much them accompanying my family to California meant to us.

Enchiladas

2009-01-31T04:31:00.004-06:00

Jacob 6:3
"And how blessed are they who have labored diligently in his vineyard; and how cursed are they who shall be cast out into their own place! And the world shall be burned with fire."

Work today couldn't get over fast enough! Despite being on window, the minutes seemed to tick by so much slower than normal. I suppose though that is a good thing since it echoes the level of excitement that I had for my trip to Utah. The flight was tight, but nonetheless I got one of the last two seats (I think) and made the flight.

So here I am in Utah, so glad to be here, and it is just as fun and enjoyable as I'd hoped it would be. As Rachel picked me up from the airport, she informed me that her grandmother had made enchiladas for us, woohoo! A homecooked meal! Beats dining out any day.

Well, it is late, and I am very tired, so I am cutting this short. But a promise is a promise, so here I am, blogging!

Sacrament and such

2009-01-29T22:02:00.005-06:00

Jacob 5:41

"And it came to pass that the Lord of the vineyard wept, and said unto the servant; What could I have done more for my vineyard?"

Institute tonight was wonderful, as always. The discussion was on the sacrament, more specifically Elder Oak's as well as Elder Holldans talks on it. It really helped me gain a deeper perspective on how significant the sacrament is, and that it's not just a weekly routine, but an important, sacred, individual event, no matter how often we may partake of it. I find it enlightening that an apostle of God dubbed it the single most important and significant meeting out of every meeting that the church holds. WOW. There are so many different meetings, classes, conferences, etc. But the sacrament meeting is the #1 most significant. That really struck home with me. Maybe I should practice a bit more on the hymns each week, particularly the sacrament hymns.

Another thought that was presented that made me start to ponder was the following. "Every ordinance of the gospel focuses in one way or another on the atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ." Every single one? There must be far more to the atonement than meets the eye if that's the case. Everything in the gospel hinges on the atonement, points to the atonement, testifies of the atonement, and its importance and significance. And the sacrament is how we partake of the atonement each week. It's how we renew our baptismal covenants. It's how we re-live the feelings we had when we got baptised, every week.

If that is the most important part of the most important meeting we have in the church, shouldn't that also be the most important part of our week? Shouldn't we be constantly preparing to take the sacrament in the way we prepared to get baptised? Isn't that what the sacrament prayers are all about? Remembering Him? Taking upon us His name? Keeping His commandments? If the act of taking the sacrament is so significant, shouldn't we constantly be thinking about the covenants that it renews? Weekly, Daily, Hourly?

It's a lot to think about, and it can be a life-changing thought process if we let it be. This is something I'm going to have to ponder on, and pray about.

*Thinks about tomorrow*

Utah! Here I come!

Core Values

2009-01-29T00:17:00.003-06:00

Jacob 4:10-11

"Wherefore, brethren, seek not to counsel the Lord, but to take counsel from his hand. For behold, ye yourselves know that he counseleth in wisdom, and in justice, and in great mercy, over all his works.

Wherefore, beloved brethren, be reconciled unto him through the atonement of Christ, his Only Begotten Son, and ye may obtain a resurrection, according to the power of the resurrection which is in Christ, and be presented as the first-fruits of Christ unto God, having faith, and obtained a good hope of glory in him before he manifesteth himself in the flesh."

I have been listening to some really great audio cd's on leadership and self-assessment. It really helps to get me in the mind set of the way I should be conducting myself at work, and why. And not only does it help me with the way I should be acting as a leader at work, but we are all leaders in our own right in our personal lives as well, and so I have been thinking along with the cd's in perpsective to my personal life as well. I can't say that I have anything concrete at this moment in time to expound upon as far as things the cd's have taught me, but that's mainly because I have been listening to them solely whilst I drive. I need to listen to them on my computer and take some notes. I don't learn very well when I'm simply hearing or listening to something, I need to write it down, and that act of writing things down is how it imprints onto my brain. Much like the notes I have been taking abouth the leadership training book that I have been reading.

One of the leadership principles that I jotted down from that book really struck a chord with me when I read it. "People will not give you their hand until they can see your heart." That really hit me. I immediately think of missionary work when I think of that statement. If the people you are trying to teach the gospel to don't see your face light up, if they don't see your unwavering belief in what you are saying, if they don't see your heart, they are NOT going to give you their hand because they're not convinced that even you believe what you are saying. And if they don't think you believe yourself, why should they believe you?

The same goes with every aspect of our lives. If we want people to follow or to listen to us, we can't just blow smoke. We have to show them that we are there for them and with them, every step of the way. This may seem like common sense to a lot of people, but even to those people I doubt they understand that this principle works in all walks of life and not just the ones in which they routinely demonstrate this characteristic.

And the other statement that has really got me thinking is also an obvious one, but one that can really help people if they wrap their heads around it: "Our values are the beliefs that drive our behavior." Think about that for a moment. If we have a value, we act on it. Why do we do the things we do? Because we believe the way we believe. Every action we make in life (and these are my own words, not the words of the book that I'm just regurgitating) is a result of something we honestly believe. If we lie to someone, then we honestly believe that the truth is not the best course of action currently. If we pull over on the side of the road to help someone who might be stranded, then we honestly believe that person needs a helping hand and we honestly believe that we are the person who can and should help them. If we start a healthy routine in our life, tell everyone about it, and then stop doing it without people knowing, but we lead them on to think we're still doing it... then we honestly believe that misleading people is what we should be doing with our life at that moment.

That's not to say that we will always have the same values and that there is no hope for us if we happen to have a bad value at any given point in time. But we can honestly trace everything we do in life back to our core values. And inorder to change a habit, a reaction, an action, we have to change our value that led to that action. It's much like my blog last night talked about. In order to combat sin, we have to change the way we look at sin as a whole. In order to combat a bad habit, we have to change the way we look at the aspect of our life that created that habit.

That is what develops our heart, which is what gets people to listen to us, to follow us, to love us. No one wants to follow a closed book or a locked door. Why? Because you don't know where they're leading you, what's inside of them, or why they do what they do. People want to follow those who have a passion for something so much that they are willing to jump out of their chairs to share every detail of that passion with everyone that cares to know, or heck, people who don't care to know!

All of this has got me thinking about an even better way to spend my time in my car (because I do indeed spend a lot of time driving). Instead of work-related audio cd's, instead of classical music (though that's good on occasion as well, mmm chopin), I should get some church audio cd's, make my own, find some to purchase, anything, and spiritually feed myself as I drive. That would definitely help me keep perspective on life and even the small details as I go about my day.

With nothing wavering

2009-01-27T23:42:00.004-06:00

Jacob 3:2

"O all ye that are pure in heart, lift up your heads and receive the pleasing word of God, and feast upon his love; for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever."

The weather today was terrible. Bad enough that we closed early at work. Which kind of stinks since I lost about 5 hours of work, which means I won't be getting any overtime this week. But I guess I can't really complain because that's the nature of the fast food industry, and the amount of money that Mike will lose due to the inclement weather is far worse than any financial disturbance I may have. So there's nothing really worth getting upset over. I appreciate the wonderful opportunity he has given me to grow in the job that I have, I honestly love every minute of my work, and I thank God almost nightly for the wonderful operator that Mike is because it has given me an awesome job for the last year plus.

However, having the night off was nice. I got some more reading done out of the book that Andrew gave me to read to help develop my skills as a leader. Which is a great book by the way, I'm 84 pages into it and I already have about 5 pages of notes! It also gave me a chance to talk to Rachel tonight whereas I otherwise would not have had much time to. On tuesday nights she goes to bed right around the time I normally get home from work since she attends the temple at 6am in the morning. So that turned out to be a blessing in disguise. :) (If I haven't mentioned this yet, I am so completely excited about this weekend!)

For the first time in a while, I suppose, my mind is finally at peace. Maybe that's why I haven't felt like discussing as many spiritual topics as I have up until recently. There's no particular topic that my mind has been drawn to lately, including today. Life just seems to have reached that stage where I am not consumed by anything spiritually as far as my brain power is concerned. That's not to say that I'm not still growing continuously and still trying to better myself each day. But I think I have finally found peace within myself. Planning for the future doesn't seem to concern me as much any more. Trusting in the Lord is starting to become more a routine than a challenge. There is always of course the daily struggles with those things that don't come easy, but I think I have found the way to begin combatting those as well.

Not saying it is easy, and I think this is something I have discussed in a previous blog. But from my experience, the only way to deal with sin in a healthy way when you consider the long term, is not the way that seems obvious. A lot of people when they view repentance and "overcoming sin" break their lives down into the specific sins they commit. If someone has a problem telling the truth, they work on their honesty, sometimes to the point where they don't worry about other sins that may be creeping in (like pride, covetousness, etc). What has really been a moment of awakening for me recently has been the way I have begun to view sin as an entity all its own.

Just because you may struggle with one or a few particular sins doesn't mean that you should ignore things that may be easier for you to deal with. What I have realized is that it isn't the specific sins that we should be worried about, but the idea of sin itself. It takes a change of mind set for most people. People who fragment their lives into strengths and weaknesses. People who are constantly trying to better specific areas of their lives, often times at the weakening of a different area. What I have been slowly working on as of late is a paradigm change. To view sin as an all encompassing entity that should be avoided altogether. All sin should be reprehensible to us. Pornography, murder, pride, lust, false witness, all the way down to mere blips of an impure thought.

It has taken me a long time to get to this point, and I still have a long way to go. But some of the things that I believe have helped me get to this point are:

Reading the scriptures EVERY day
Paying attention in church, to EVERY word that is said, and trying to focus on the spiritual aspect of things while I'm there
The musical diet I have been stringent about, WITHOUT EXCEPTION (read more on that here)
This very blog/journal that I have been keeping DAILY
Nightly AND morning prayers
Attending institute EVERY thursday night

I capitalized certain words in each of those bullet points for a reason. They show commitment, they illustrate routine and repetition, they show discipline. These are very important to changing habits and paradigms. The reason for this is because you are trying to reconfigure the very things you have been hard wired to do and think. Most importantly in that last sentence is the word think. "As a man thinketh, so he is." Thoughts are so powerful, and the only way to change one's thoughts is to replace them with better thoughts (or, you can replace them with worse thoughts as I once did.)

I got thinking, "how did I get to the point where I thought unholy thoughts nearly 24/7 for a period of years?" And it dawned on me. The reason that I was constantly having perverse thoughts, the reason I couldn't focus on anything that may have resembled holiness, is because of the constant degrading things that I was doing and listening to. I was surrounding myself with people that used foul language. I was watching movies and shows that disrespected women, families, used foul language, and so forth. I was listening to music that used foul language, that was loud and coarse, that literally drove the spirit away. I was actively surrounding myself with things that worked against the spirit, not with the spirit, and I did them for a long enough period of time that my thoughts tended to follow that same pattern.

So, in trying to re-wire my thoughts, I realized the only course of action was to put myself in a saturated environment that worked in the complete opposite direction from those things I had previously been surrounded by. I started only watching movies that I would feel comfortable watching with member friends, started going to church weekly, stopped swearing, started going to institute, started reading the scripture daily, started listening to only uplifting and inspiring music; basically I took all of the activities I was previously doing, and REPLACED them with wholesome counterparts. And the most important part of that was being diligent and stringent in never letting the other influences surround me for even a day, even a moment. But surrounding myself with only uplifting influences, my thoughts couldn't help but follow suit eventually, and sure enough, I am well on my way to doing just that.

Instead of the thoughts I once had, I now find my thoughts drifting towards the scriptures, towards righteous options in the future, towards church, towards choir, towards uplifting music, and so forth.

And then I got thinking, "why does this ever have to change?" Even when I get married and start a family, why do any of the things I have been doing have to change? Is this not how Christ lived His life? by surrounding himself with the 12 apostles? By constantly being about His Father's business, by constantly being busy helping and healing and teaching others? He didn't take "time outs" from life and go listen to the music that the harlots and publicans listened to "just to chill" or what have you. No, He was adamantly righteous. He abhorred sin. His thoughts were so focused on that of righteousness that when an unholy thought came to Him, I imagine it was such a foreign thing to Him that He immediately recognized it and rejected it.

Isn't that what we should all strive for? Are there times when a thought pops into our head that doesn't seem like "such a bad idea" at first, and then it slowly grows on us as it festers in our mind? That's how Satan works, he presents an idea that seems harmless, but we can tell that there might be something slightly awry with it at first. But the more we ponder on it, the less alien it seems. That's exactly what we need to be actively working against. We should make our thoughts so focused on holiness and righteousness that when Satan plants a thought in our brain, it immediately feels alien to us, and that's how we recognize that it's of the devil and should thusly be cast out.

Christ lived a perfect life, that means He never sinned, that does NOT mean He was never tempted. Being tempted is not a sin, people often confuse the two. Being tempted is a test, and overcoming that temptation is where we show our true colors, that's how we grow and develop.

Just because my thoughts are beginning to align with those of righteousness does not mean that I have won or that my battle with Satan is over, that's just what he wants me to think. He lets us get feeling good about ourselves because of how good we've been, and then plants the idea in our brain that we "deserve" some me-time. Some time to not worry about those pressing matters of exaltation and eternal life. Those are hard to constantly be wrapped up in. And that's when he gets us. Instead I need to make sure that I continue doing those things that have brought me such peace, such joy, such comfort, such wonderful thoughts. Until they morph into thoughts that I haven't had before simply because Christ trusts me to have even better and more holy thoughts. The spirit can not dwell in an unclean temple. To qualify my mind for the presence of the spirit, I must be ever watchful to keep it clean. The operative word there is ever, never resting, never yielding, always moving forward and in the right direction.

Which brings me full circle to the verse I began this blog with. "O all ye that are pure in heart, lift up your heads and receive the pleasing word of God, and feast upon his love; for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever."

Pure in heart - there is nothing wavering about something that is pure. Only then can you receive the pleasing word of God and feast upon his love.

If your minds are firm, forever - again, nothing wavering. Firmness doesn't break, forever is not a short period of time. The scriptures speak in such absolutes and with such resoluteness. We must follow suit if we are to pass the fifth principle of the gospel: Endure to the End. This means the end, not just most of the way. Never let your guard down, never stop progressing. When you stagnate, that's when satan creeps in.

I pray that I will continue down this path.

Not the Jaguar!

2009-01-27T01:11:00.003-06:00

Jacob 2:17-19

"Think of your brethren like unto yourselves, and be familiar with all and free with your substance, that they may be rich like unto you.

But before ye seek for riches, seek ye for the kingdom of God.

And after ye have obrained a hope in Christ ye shall obtain riches, if ye seek them; and ye will seek them for the intent to do good - to clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted."

Sorry to post so late tonight, but I have a good excuse! (Actually, it's what I'm going to blog about haha.) However, that's not where I'm starting tonight.

Today has been an overall wonderful day. Started out kind of oddly, but even that turned out to be a blessing in disguise, anyways. So I got a call (woke me up) from John David this morning at 9:30 (he's the asst. gen. manager at my work) asking me if I could come in early today. I thought 'hmm, 2.5 hours of overtime pay? heck yes!' So I jumped out of bed, got showered, and started getting dressed. As I was doing so I glanced at my phone and noticed that I had received a text message. Well it was John David thanking me for being willing to come in, but they no longer needed me to. GRR. Oh well, I was up now and ready for the day. So I decided to start reading the book on leadership that Andrew (my general manager) had given me to read. It's a really good book and a very fast read, I look forward to finishing it in the next couple of days.

Anyways, right as I got to a stopping point in the book and started thinking about finishing getting ready for work, I got a call from Rachel. Now, I already knew what this call was going to be about, but I was still overly anxious to answer the phone. Sure enough, she was calling me to thank me for sending her the flowers that arrived at her door today. Her excitement about them completely made my day. I could have tripped in mud, lost my contacts, whatever.. and that still would have made today wonderful!

Work was crazy slow tonight, but I was able to counter part of that by saving a good amount of labor. In doing so, I often time like to help my crew out by cleaning the dining room for them, and since Misty (one of our team leaders) was working tonight, I was able to do just that because she was able to take care of the financials for the day and relieve me of any back-office duties I may have otherwise needed to do, which makes doing dining room for my crew impossible. I haven't had a closing partner (managerial wise) in a while so I haven't been able to do that for my employees in a long while, it felt nice to get out there and get my hands dirty for a while so that one or two of my employees didn't have to. On top of that, we were able to get everything done early and save Mike some labor money. (Go go bonus! lol)

Anyways, now for the interesting part.. Now, I don't tell this story to toot my own horn, but it definitely is a "blogging-worthy" event that happened, so here we go. As I was driving home from work, I was almost home when I started going up an off-ramp connecting 183 and 121. Well, as I was making the curve the car infront of me started hydroplaning (it was wet and a bit rainy outside) and he smashed into the side of the bridge! I was on the phone at the time and immediately ended the conversation so that I could pull over and see if he/she was alright! As I approached the car a guy about my age got out of it. He seemed a bit shocked (obviously) but other than that didn't seem to sustain any injuries, serious or otherwise. As I got closer, I got a better look at the car. IT WAS A VINTAGE JAGUAR! My heart sunk a tiny bit, but I quickly shook that off as I started talking to the guy.

Due to the coldness and the wetness, and the fact that we were on the side of the freeway, I offered to drive him to a quiet and warm place so that he could collect himself and call someone. He thanked me and off we went. Well, as soon as we got into my car he asked me "hey, I was on my way to work, you think you could take me there? I'm gonna see if they can give me the night off, I really am not in a working mood any more." I said sure, and asked him where he worked. So, in the midst of that conversation, calling the police and reporting the incident completely slipped our minds! (yeah, kind of funny.. and kind of really sad, and pretty bad.. all rolled up into one interesting situation haha) So I found out that his name is Jose and that he works at the Game Stop distribution center right by my house. So I drove him to his work, he went in and got the night off, and I offered to drive him home (since his mother was asleep and he really had no other means of getting home.) Turns out he lives in Keller, so off we went the way we came.

Well, as we got to the opposite side of the freeway from the wreck we realized "uh oh, there's a fire truck and police swarming the accident... WE FORGOT TO REPORT IT!" haha. So, I quickly exit and turn around. We jog up to the police and apologize for not reporting it sooner, and give a brief explanation as to why. Luckily he had his insurance on him, and we had gotten there before they towed his vehicle (though, the tow truck was already there). We got everything sorted out and he got his case number, and back towards Keller we went. Phew!

So, as we were driving I got to know him a bit better. Turns out his mother works where my mom once worked (American Airlines SRO), I doubt they really knew anything of eachother though, my mom speaks english, his speaks spanish. I also found out that he is a very spiritual and religious person, but he has a problem with preachers who take the words of the Bible and spin them into their own interpretation, and he has thusly lost all faith in "organized religion." He didn't say those words exactly, but they were very much implied through the words he did choose to use (which I can't recall perfectly at this moment in time.) I thought about inviting him to church, but then thought better of it. He has a lot on his mind right now and the last thing he probably wants is an invitation from a total stranger, which in turn might make my act of kindness simply a catalyst to an effort to "convert him" or what not. We did talk about my faith, but not in very much detail.

So instead, when we got to his house, I gave him my name and number so that he could call me incase his insurance needed a witness for the claim. I also told him that I'd be willing to drive him to work tomorrow if he so needs. His shift starts at 11:30pm and I can easily get from my work to his house, and then to his work by then. He thanked me for the offer, however he is first going to see if he can borrow his father's car tomorrow. Regardless, I hope that my act of kindness has touched him in at least a small way. He seems pretty jaded as far as "humanity" goes. Hopefully I planted a seed. We'll see if anything comes of this, small or grand, if so, I will definitely be updating a future blog with the news!

Beautiful to Him

2009-01-26T00:53:00.003-06:00

Jacob 1:19

"And we did magnify our office unto the Lord, taking upon us the responsibility, answering the sins of the people upon our own heads if we did not teach them the word of God with all diligence; wherefore, by laboring with our might their blood might not come upon our garments; otherwise their blood would come upon our garments, and we would not be found spotless at the last day."

Today was Ward Council for the singles ward. It was wonderful, and I learned a lot from it. I love hearing president Manion speak, he is so inspiring, and he is such a great man. He knows my family better than anyone, and the amount of love he has for my family brings such a spirit of peace and love to me. I am so glad that I got to perform Jon Schmidt's 'A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief' today for sacrament meeting if not for any other reason than President Manion was in attendance.

However, tonight I feel impressed to write down some song lyrics that have helped to give me strength over the last few months:

Beatiful To Him by: Rachel Thibodeau

So much noise, so much peace destroyed,

I can hardly hear the voice, leading me through the void,

So much noise.

The world's little lies,

Destruction in disguise, opportunities to compromise,

To make me beautiful in their eyes,

But I'm not gonna buy the world's little lies.

'Cuz I define myself and find my beauty in the light He gives.

I'm refined by His divine intentions every day I live.

It doesn't matter what the world believes,

Or what they say that beauty means,

It comes from within,

I want to be beautiful to Him.

He's given me His trust, so I'll be strong enough,

To run from a dangerous touch, I don't need that kind of love,

I don't need that crutch, He's given me his trust.

I define myself and find my beauty in the light He gives.

I'm refined by His divine intentions every day I live.

It doesn't matter what the world believes,

Or what they say that beauty means,

It comes from within,

I want to be beautiful to Him.

I know how to shine, my life's not really mine.

It's not about a worldly climb, it's all about His design.

So in His eyes, I want to shine.

'Cuz I define myself and find my beauty in the light He gives.

I'm refined by His divine intentions every day I live.

It doesn't matter what the world believes,

Or what they say that beauty means,

It comes from within,

I want to be beautiful to Him.

I want to live to have His peace,

And feel the holiness He seeks.

It comes from within.

I want to be beautiful... to Him.

Forgiveness

2009-01-25T01:06:00.003-06:00

2 Nephi 33:10

"...And if ye shall believe in Christ ye will believe in these words, for they are the words of Christ, and he hath given them unto me; and they teach all men that they should do good."

My mind, at this time in my life, is turned to a certain parable in the New Testament. It is found in Matthew 18, verses 23-34. It speaks about forgiving debts, and implies that debts be thought of as insults/trespasses/sins against us in life. And if we have been forgiven our tespasses against Christ, then we have no place to stand in condemning others when the greater forgiveness lies in our favor. The parable finishes by explaining that if we fail to forgive other people in this life, we must then be considered as unforgiven in the Lord's eyes, and must therefore pay for our sins when we otherwise would not have to. The verse after the parable where Christ sums it up is the powerful part though, in my estimation. It reads as follows:

"So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses."

As my mind is consumed with the topic of forgiveness, restitution, repentance, etc, I can't help but come to an understanding, after reading this scripture, that it really is our own loss if we can't find the strength, the humility, the love, to forgive everyone that offends us. Whether it be a great offense or a small one. The offense itself isn't what matters to the Lord, but the way in which we respond to it. The way our heart looks at it. The way in which we do or do not forgive the offender, an honest and sincere forgiveness, and not just lip service.

And what do we do if we find ourselves unforgiven by our fellow man of offenses we have committed against them? Well, the worst thing we can do is let their sin (the sin of unforgiveness) affect our own ability to forgive, our own ability to feel the spirit, our own ability to believe in others, our own ability to believe in ourself. If we truly repent for our sins, make proper restitution (which many times requires the approval of the church), and truly separate ourselves from that sin in desire and in being consumed in the guilt, then there is no reason that we should let the unforgiving heart of someone else affect us in any way. The Lord lets us know that we are forgiven by giving us a burning in our bosom when we pray about it. The feeling of peace that overcomes us when we pray is nothing other than revelation, and it should not be taken lightly. If God deems us worthy to be forgiven, we should be rejoicing, not questioning it. Questioning our status in the Lord's eyes after receiving the comfort of the Holy Ghost is nothing short of pride.

Interesting conundrum that we're apt to get into isn't it? Our lack of ability to feel forgiven for a sin we've committed, ends up contrasting the very spirit that led us to repent in the first place, humility.

"Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."

Satan's War

2009-01-23T23:47:00.002-06:00

2 Nephi 32:8-9

"And now, my beloved brethren, I perceive that ye ponder still in your hearts; and it grieveth me that I must speak concerning this thing. For if ye would hearken unto the Spirit which teacheth a man to pray ye would know that ye must pray; for the evil spirit teacheth not a man to pray, but teacheth him that he must not pray.

But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul."

As I was reading Ben's blog (Ben is the husband of one of my cousins) I came across this quote given by the church:

Despite its popularity with some, much of today’s television entertainment shows an unhealthy preoccupation with sex, coarse humor and foul language. Big Love, like so much other television programming, is essentially lazy and indulgent entertainment that does nothing for our society and will never nourish great minds. Parents who are casual about their viewing habits ought not to be surprised if teaching moral choices and civic values to their children becomes harder as a result.For that reason and others, Church leaders have consistently cautioned against such entertainment, joining with other religious, education and government leaders in inviting individuals and families to follow a higher road of decency, self-discipline and integrity.

I have long had very similar thoughts. And obviously you can say that same thing about a lot more "tv programming" than just the show 'Big Love.' But what the church says here is undoubtedly true. There are many things in life that can be either a positive OR a negative influence. There are only 2 influences in life, a positive or a negative, there is no middle ground, ever. And that has to do with far more than just the entertainment industry.

Just like the scripture I opened with states, "for the evil spirit teacheth not a man to pray, but teacheth him that he must not pray." You either pray, or you don't. There is no middle ground to prayer, you either do it or you don't. Doing it is a positive thing, not doing it is a negative thing. The way in which we use the technology at our hand is much, if not exactly, the same way.

What type of music do we listen to? When we listen to things that don't uplift us, why?

What type of television shows do we allow ourselves to watch? Why?

What type of movies do we watch? What are our movie standards?

When we get on the internet, where do we let ourselves idly browse?

Do we listen to the words of the prophets, or do we just hear them?

Do we take notes in church/institute/seminary? Why or why not?

What jokes do we find funny? What does laughing at a crude joke really say about our character?

When we read the scriptures, are we more focused on story line or on subject matter?

Do we feast on them and dissect them and cross reference them? Or do we read them like we would a magazine?

When we get angry, what words do we think but don't say? Why do we allow our thoughts to betray us?

In every single example here, there is zero middle ground. There is either positive OR negative. No shades of grey, no room for compromise. I'd wager that in pre-mortal life, we never had to struggle with any of this. This is a mortal battle we are fighting, and one that will wage on until Christ comes again. We can't risk letting our guard down, even for a moment.

Could you imagine the feeling of pain and regret if you found yourself looking at something vile and degrading on the television, and then at that moment received a call to use the very priesthood that you have to benefit the life of another person? How painful would that be?

We are here to serve eachother and to help eachother along the path towards exaltation. What is the point of this life if we are UNABLE to help? If we don't take care of our own thoughts, words, deeds, how can we be expected to lift another? No one makes it to the Celestial Kingdom alone, how agonizing would it be to know that you were unable to help your brother or sister along that journey? Christ could have come to the earth, live a perfect life, and never performed a miracle. His life still would have been perfect. But his selfless acts of love, his miracles, his teachings and admonishings, those were his ways to lift us up. Those were his ways to facilitate the progress of those around him (and all of mankind) towards the Father's presence. What is our legacy going to be? What are we going to do to help those around us. If we don't take care of our personal worthiness, the answer is, unfortunately, nothing.

The Lord asks us to help His children on His own timetable. If we pick and choose when we are available to help those around us, we are telling God that our timetable is better than His. If we aren't ready when we are called, we may as well not have been called to do the work.

There is no middle ground, there is only positive or negative. Don't get caught on the decline when you're needed in an uphill battle.

Spiritual Siblings

2009-01-23T00:19:00.004-06:00

2 Nephi 31:19-20

"And now, my beloved brethren, after ye have gotten into this strait and narrow path, I would ask if all is done? Behold, I say unto you, Nay; for ye have not come thus far save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save.

Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life."

Institute tonight, as always, was amazing. It honestly has become the highlight of my week. Though tonight, for the first time since I've started attending institute, I think I was taught something that had nothing to do with the lesson that was far deeper and more penetrating to my soul than the lesson was. The lesson was on prayer, more specifically about Elder Bednar's most recent talk on prayer (wonderful talk by the way, I reccomend looking it up on lds.org, powerful stuff). But as the lesson was being started, sister Elmer mentioned something about Elder Bednar that struck me deeply. She mentioned that he had an experience that revealed to him one of the "meanings for his life being at that time" referring to his being a facilitator for his father's baptism, and helping him to prepare for that moment in his life.

That got me thinking. "Am I on earth at the very moment that I am for the purpose of helping any specific people in any specific way?" And I couldn't help but answer the question with a yes. I won't go into the details of my answer, for they are not my place to share, but as I was pondering that a deep peace and a feeling of comfort came over me that testified to me that the way I have been conducting my life for the better part of the last year is equatable to something referred to as the ministry of angels.

As the lesson went on, brother Elmer hit on another doctrine that impacted me in a way other than he intended it to. He was talking about how if when we pray, we pray to our Father in heaven, and that if He truly is our Father, we should be able to have real, sincere, conversation with Him. And that if He is our father, we are all actual brothers and sisters. Siblings in a very real sense of the word. That got my mind racing even faster, back on the previous topic as well. If my friends here on earth are my siblings, and the other people my age are my siblings (spiritually speaking, and really, isn't the spiritual side of life the most important side anyways?), then aren't those who have come before also my siblings? As well as those who have yet to be born? Are we not ALL spiritual siblings? That in and of itself wasn't the epiphany that I had. The thing that really got me thinking prompted me to write it down:

"Stages in life is all that separates humans, because we are literally all siblings."

I may start to ramble here, so bear with me... As human years go, we are all relatively the same age spiritually. We all were in the pre-mortal existence, and we weren't in families then. Which means that the family unit that we are so tied to here on earth is a new thing for our spirit to get accustomed to (As far as our earth family being more important to us than our spiritual family, which literally encompasses everyone). So by extension, that means that our earthly parents, are literally our siblings as well! It's easy for us to think that people of our generation are our siblings spiritually, but when we extend that to our parents, grandparents, and so forth, it seems a whole lot less "common" to our brain. But the role of families is imperative to our exaltation, so there must be something to it other than a random chance that we were born into the familes we currently reside in.

Maybe it's because God knew that we would be able to offer the members of our family something that we couldn't otherwise offer them if we weren't as temporally close to them as we are. Something they NEED in order to make it back to our Heavenly Father's presence. Maybe not something they need, but something that will more easily facilitate that journey.

When people say that they learn something from their children, they really mean it. Children are just as apt to teach adults as vice versa, after all Christ did admonish everyone to "be as a little child." Maybe there's more to that statement than most people realize.

But putting that aside, the chronology of mankind in relation to geneology is in my opinion no mistake. Every person born into a family brings something to that family that no other soul could have. And that will carry over into the eternities, as we make the journey to get there AS a family.

Looking at the different stages in life, our role as adults is to teach those of future generations how to grow accustomed to life with a body, imperfection, repentance, things we didn't have to worry about before this life. Sharing experiences, sharing wisdom, sharing knowledge, facilitating in every way possible your child's desire to once again feel the warmth of their Heavenly Father's embrace. That's what this life is all about. We are all siblings, we must all lift eachother up, especially those in our families. Families are eternal. There are no accidents in who your family is comprised of.

"I always want to be with my own family,

and the Lord has shown me how I can.

The Lord, has shown me how I can."

Dream Big

2009-01-21T23:25:00.003-06:00

2 Nephi 30:8

"And it shall come to pass that the Lord God shall commence his work among all nations, kindreds, tongues, and people, to bring about the restoration of his people upon the earth."

Well, for the first time in way too long (6, 7 years?), I went to the temple tonight and it was everything I hoped it would be. I didn't get as much scripture study in as I would have liked because we were short on people, and it just didn't work out that way, but regardless, it was amazing. Going there makes me want even more to partake of more of the blessings of the gospel and of the temple that I currently don't have. Even if it turns out that the First Presidency decides that I can't serve a mission for my church, I believe that I will still get endowed as soon as possible. Honestly, I feel ready. I'm no longer the boy that I used to be, I'm ready for the next stages of life, in every way, and progressing forward is the only way that I will grow both in spirituality and in character. I can't wait for the day that going through the temple becomes as second nature as going to church. Both will always be sacred, spiritual, and instructive things (to varying degrees obviously), but the comfortability with the culture of the temple, and the feelings that spill over from it into life, will be amazing. Something that I hope to be able to draw strength from at any given time.

"And when you dream, dream big, as big as the ocean blue.

Cuz when you dream it might come true.

So when you dream, dream big."

I love that song, and it is so fitting with the way that I plan to tackle life. In my mind, there is nothing in this life that is too much for me to take on. Especially if I plan to succeed at anything I set my sights on, big or small. I mean really, if you always take the easy route in life, if you always just take the course that presents itself, you'll never achieve anything that you would esteem of worth. You will always be settling. Your life will unfold infront of you without you really having much say in the matter, as opposed to you unfolding your own life in the ways in whicn you desire.

Much is the same with the gospel and righteous living. If you always settle for just living in faith without taking much action in building up your own testimony, then the testimony you will be left with is that of those around you. You will be buoyed up in the spirit only if those who are strong are near you. However, once you have taken the gospel's truth into your own conscious thought, and figured out WHY truth is what it is... Once you begin striving to be stronger in the gospel each day, once you begin focusing on building your testimony as opposed to letting it simply flatline, that is when true strength will be realized and that's when you'll see your life blessed in ways you never thought imaginable.

Just like you can picture yourself in your dream job, driving your dream car, married to your dream spouse, with your dreamy future life... So as well should you be able to see yourself in your dream "afterlife" and thusly be ever striving towards it.

Exciting News!

2009-01-20T23:25:00.002-06:00

2 Nephi 29:9-11

"And I do this that I may prove unto many that I am the same yesterday, today, and forever; and that I speak forth my words according to mine own pleasure. And because that I have spoken one word ye need not suppose that I cannot speak another; for my work is not yet finished; neither shall it be until the end of man, neither from that time henceforth and forever.

Wherefore, because that ye have a Bible ye need not suppose that it contains all my words; neither need ye suppose that I have not caused more to be written.

For I command all men, both in the east and in the west, and in the north, and in the south, and in the islands of the sea, that they shall write the words which I speak unto them; for out of the books which shall be written I will judge the world, every man according to their works, according to that which is written."

So far so good. I'm doing my daily stretches first thing when I wake up. And I went ahead and started off with 10 push-ups and 10 sit-ups in addition to my 25 jumping jacks each morning. That has really helped to get my day started, I can already feel the effects of it. I feel more limber and less tense as the day goes on. I think I just might keep this up! haha

Exciting news! It looks as though I will be able to make both out of town trips this year that I have planned! First, next weekend (superbowl weekend as it is commonly known) I will be in Utah visiting Rachel as well as some of my extended family (the Lombardis and whomever else I happen to run into whilst I'm there!). I plan on doing temple work in the Salt Lake City Temple, since I'll be right there, I have a current temple reccomend (finally!) and I have never even been inside of that temple! Oh I'm so excited!

After that Rachel and I are planning to go see a play called "Thoroughly Modern Millie." I have never heard of it, but I trust her taste so I'm sure it will be great. After that, Jon Schmidt just happens to be performing at the Wilkinson at BYU, so I guess we'll have to go see him play! Oh I can't wait! Sunday, my Aunt Taunia is throwing a superbowl party, and Rachel and I have been invited, so I look forward to going to that, hopefully a good amount of my family will be there, I miss them so much. I feel like I used to know my cousins so well, but since I haven't been to Utah in ages, we have unfortunately lost touch. Not sure what the plans for monday are as of yet, but I'm sure we'll come up with something. I'm so looking forward to this trip, time really needs to speed up so it will be here already!

More exciting news! From March 15th through March 29th, I will (hopefully, most likely?) be half way across the world in Brunei! I am so looking forward to the experience of being in the Phillipines. Travelling through whichever connecting cities we hit will be amazing as well! But the most special part of the trip will be getting to spend time with my sister and her lovely family for the better part of 2 weeks. I miss them so much, they are such wonderful people. I look at her family and I hope and pray that my family, whenever I get to starting one, will be half as happy, righteous, and lovely as hers is. That family truly is an inspiration to me. I love you guys! My camera is going to get a lot of love over there!

I thank the Lord each and every day for the wonderful people He has put into my life. I wouldn't be where I am today if it weren't for them and the guiding influence and light. I love my family and those that are closest to me so much, I really do hope and pray that we all stay close and eternally connected in the world to come.

Wednesday

2009-01-19T23:05:00.002-06:00

Tonight there were 2 passages that struck me to the point that I couldn't choose between them, so I chose both!

2 Nephi 28:4-6

"And they shall contend one with another; and their priests shall contend one with another, and they shall teach with their learning, and deny the Holy Ghost, which giveth utterance.

And they deny the power of God, the Holy One of Israel; and they say unto the people: Hearken unto us, and hear ye our precept; for behold there is no God today, for the Lord and the Redeemer hath done his work, and he hath given his power unto men;

Behold, hearken ye unto my precept; if they shall say there is a miracle wrought by the hand of the Lord, believe it not; for this day he is not a God of miracles; he hath done his work."

2 Nephi 28:27-29

"Yea, wo be unto him that saith: We have received, and we need no more!

And in fine, wo unto all those who tremble, and are angry because of the truth of God! For behold, he that is built upon the rock receiveth it with gladness; and he that is built upon a sandy foundation trembleth lest he shall fall.

Wo be unto him that shall say: We have received the word of God, and we need no more of the word of God, for we have enough!"

I grow more and more excited for Wednesday as each day passes. It has been so long since I have felt the wonderous feelings that can be felt in the temple. I can still remember going as a young adult, vividly. I can still remember those feelings. Nothing compares to them. Everything is clearer there, everything is easier to understand there, everything is more easily put into perspective there.

There is so much in my life right now that seems to be confusing. So much seems like such an important choice that could take my life down one path or the other, and once I'm commited to one path, it is impossible to reverse that path. Just when these decisions seem to be rearing their heads, I feel myself desiring to take control and figure out what the best decisions are on my own accord, because they effect ME. And this is precisely when I need to remember to include the Lord in my decision-making process. I can not think that my timetable is better than His. I can not think that I am wiser in my own life-choices than He is. Is there anything more arrogant to think than that? God knows what is best for me far more so than I do. I need to continue taking it one day at a time, and continue including the Lord in all of my decisions, both life-changing and minute. Taking life one step at a time is really the only way to do it. And then when you look back at how your life has unfolded is the only way to really gain perspective on how it might unfold in the future. And if you have included the Lord in your decisions day by day, how wonderful looking back on your life will be!

I pray for the strength to remember the Lord in all of my decisions, both big and small. He truly loves me, and He wants what is best for me. I guess I can trust in His omnisciense and omnipotence... until I gain those qualities at least. =P

Ah, wednesday...

Benjamin Franklin

2009-01-18T21:19:00.003-06:00

2 Nephi 27:23

"For behold, I am God; and I am a God of miracles; and I will show unto the world that I am the same yesterday, today, and forever; and I work not among the children of men save it be according to their faith."

Well, today I have made even more commitments to improve my life in numerous ways. Hopefully, with the help of the Lord, my famiy, and my friends I will be successful in doing so. The commitments are:

In addition to my current reading & blogging, I am going to also read 1 chapter out of the New Testament daily.
Watch 1 CES video of a talk with my family each week.
Go on splits with the missionaries at least once per month. Hopefully that will become once per week.
Increase the amount of classical music that I listen to in order to bring peace and rest to my mind in more abundance.
Go to my lunch with my mother once a month, just the 2 of us.
Stretch every morning.
Do 25 jumping jacks every morning (I may add stomach crunches and pushups in the near future).
Eat fruit with every meal.
Continue not drinking any form of soda.
Eat one salad per week.
Get an adjustment from my brother (Chriopractor) every thursday morning.
Go to my parent's church meetings (the whole 3-hour block) every week in addition to my own meetings.

What brought all of this about? Well, doing the last one is what. I decided that I was going to go to church with my parents today, and in Sunday School (taught by Sister Reynolds) we discussed ways to increase our spiritual, mental, and physical wellness. It was a wonderful lesson that brought about ways to set easy goals (relatively anyways) that can better your life. Really though, if you add up the time commitment that all of that entails on a weekly basis that's roughly 4 hours or so added to the entire week. That's really not that much extra time thrown in there, especially when the only time commitments I currently have are work, church, institute, and a monthly temple attendance. This really should be simple, but it will do me no good if I don't follow through with it.

Speaking of attending church with my parents, it was wonderful. I got to see a lot of faces that I haven't seen in a while, or if I have seen them it was merely in passing and very infrequent. I really enjoyed being able to interact with an older and more mature crowd than I usually do, and still being able to contribute to discussions and not be lost in the loftier topics that were discussed. There are a lot of people that I have such a deep love for in my parent's ward, I really do think that I will enjoy going every week with them. I know how much my parents loved me being there as well, it felt wonderful to be spiritually fed while my beloved mother and father were right next to me. Walking into priesthood opening exercises with my father, and sitting down together brought back such fond memories. When I was younger though, I would only be able to sit next to him after first playing the piano for everyone, but that won't be the case any longer in that ward. :)

If nothing else, it gives me more time to be near my parents in a spiritual setting, and really, there is not much (if anything) that is better and more uplifting than that. Seeing my parents as strong and faithful and loving as they are after all that my family has been through, is such a source of strength to me. It proves to me that so long as it's a righteous endeavor, there is nothing I can't accomplish, no struggle too great, no trial too difficult, with the support of those near and dear to me, all things truly are possible. So really why shouldn't I be able to add such simple yet uplifting things to my daily/weekly/monthly routines? Why shouldn't I be able to get through my next day simply because I may not have gotten "enough sleep" the night before? What really can be so hard as to actually defeat me in an emotional and spiritual manner?

Benjamin Franklin once set out to live a "perfect life." I think he went about it the wrong way. I have an upper hand on him in my quest, my family.

"The World"

2009-01-17T23:42:00.003-06:00

2 Nephi 26:23-24, 28

"For behold, my beloved brethren, I say unto you that the Lord God worketh not in darkness.

He doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world, even that he layeth down his own life that he may draw all men unto him. Wherefore he commandeth none that they shall not partake of his salvation.

Behold, hath the Lord commanded any that they should not partake of his goodness? Behold I say unto you, Nay; but all men are privileged the one like unto the other, and none are forbidden."

Do we really understand who we are? The potential we have? Not just our potential to rise to any situation here on earth, but eternally and immortally. Do we really understand what is at stake here on earth, the choices we make, the people we become, the values we obtain, the standards we truly take to heart?

I have noticed myself using the word truly a lot lately, it just dawned on me. But I think there is a reason. It has something to do with the blog I wrote a month or so ago about actually being who you claim to be, and not faking it. We must truly be converted to the TRUE gospel of Christ. When we are truly converted, it becomes almost easy. Once the principles of the gospel are no longer "nice ideas" but things that we truly take to heart, we will simply find ourselves exemplifying them without much extra effort beyong that which we actually desire to do. When we start making righteous choices because that's what we truly believe to be the correct choices for us, both as mortals and as immortal spirits, that's when our spirit starts simling and when we truly feel in touch with God and what He wants for us. When we truly become Christ-like.

"Ye cannot say, when ye are brought to that awful crisis, that I will repent, that I will return to my God. Nay, ye cannot say this; for that same spirit which doth possess your bodies at the time that ye go out of this life, that same spirit will have power to possess your body in that eternal world."

Something I just noticed about that scripture. "...for that same spirit which doth possess your bodies..." Our body is merely a tabernacle for our spirit. We can not attain the glory we so desire without our bodies. That being said, getting used to a body and the carnal desires that lies innate is basically the point of this life. Overcoming those base desires and getting our bodies to desire the same things that our intial spirits desires. If we lose the battle and end up letting our bodies teach our spirits what to want, that's how we'll be forever. This life is not something to be taken lightly.

It always helps me put this life into perspective when I think about the eon's of time we have existed as spirit beings before this world was even created, and the eon's of time we will yet exist, as people WITH bodies. If you can get your brain around that concept, it shows you how truly unimportant the small, everyday decisions of this life are. If we successfully make every choice in this life with the knowledge that it could possibly have ramifications for the rest of our immortal existances... I perceive that far more righteous choices would be made.

Why is it so hard for us to concentrate on the eternities? Possibly because our mind is more focused on the here and now, the "what is good for me right now" aspect of life. We get thinking about small things that we feel matter in the here and now (like work, life-responsibilities, bills, movies, random entertainment, sports, games, etc) and it gets us off track quite easily. I do believe that I will start praying for the Lord to help me keep the Celestial Kingdom, not in the back of my mind, but in the forefront of my mind with every life-choice that I make. Teaching ourselves to have an eternal perspective on life in all things is really what this life is all about. Making time for the little things (the spiritual little things) like reading the scriptures daily, not watching questionable shows, not putting yourself in questionable environements.

Staying so far away from the influence of "the world" that you start forgetting what it's like to bask in its appeal. If you can distance yourself from the pull of "the world" for a good amount of time, the next time you are tempted by it, the easier it will be to resist because the less natural for you it will feel. Keeping yourself in tune with things that are spiritual as often as possible (uplifting music, reading the scriptures, going to as many church meetings and activities as possible, uplifting friends, etc) help keep you distanced from "the world" and help to edify not only your actions but your thoughts and base desires. Because really, are we going to have "the world" around after we die? So what's the point of getting used to the world that we live in today?

We must live in the world without living of the world.

Forward Thinking

2009-01-16T21:11:00.002-06:00

2 Nephi 25:26

"And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins."

I love the scriptures. I cannot think of a better way to start and end a day than to read and ponder on them. That verse is so beautiful, so powerful. Christ really is my everything. I cannot think of a better way for an older brother so set the example of pure love and righteous action. I aspire every day to be more like him. I can't wait to teach my future children about him and about his wonderful plan for us.

This may not mean much to more than just one certain person that I know reads this, but know this now, I will be praying every day about my "forward thinking." I hope and pray that you will do the same. :)

Paraphernalia

2009-01-16T01:06:00.002-06:00

2 Nephi 24:12-15

"How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! Art thou cut down to the ground, which did weaken the nations!

For thous has said in thy heart: I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above that of the stars of God; I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north;

I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the Most High.

Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit."

Satan has such lofty goals. Such might aspirations. Yet, he is destined to fail. So, if we can only serve one master, why would we choose Satan in any form he chooses to present himself to us in? We know that Christ's way is God's way, and we know that His way is also the higher law, a better and more fulfilling way to live one's life. Satan wanted to enslave us and force us all to do things his way. No room for growth, no room for improvement.. sounds a lot like falling short of the Celestial Kingdom doesn't it?

I can't imagine the internal torment I might possibly feel if I fail to reach the Celestial Kingdom. We are immortal, we will live throughout the eternities. My GOODNESS that is hard to imagine.. yet it is true. Why oh why would we risk the rest of our immortal lives by playing with fire here on earth? This blip of time in comparison with the rest of our existance is so important, but every day people (including me) make choices that lead them down the path away from exaltation and eternal life. Is it really so hard to keep that goal in mind with every breath we take? Something of such great magnitude and importance to our eternal life should be on the forefront of our thoughts every waking moment. Every choice we make should have that end goal in mind. It astounds me that it is so difficult, yet the most wonderful people in the world continue to sin daily, and I am no exception.

I hope I will be able to attain Celestial glory, and I hope that I will meet every last one of my loved ones there as well. Infact, I should be doing everything in my power to help them make it there, because it wouldn't be the same without them.

Anyways, my day today was a great day. I always try to make the most of my days off of work, and I made today all about quality time with people that I love. I took two of my nieces (Mary and Kaelyn, Dean's daughters) over to one of my greatest friend's house to play on the wii and hang out. Garrett has a twelve year old brother that is Mary's age, so I figured they would enjoy eachother's company as friends, and sure enough everyone got a long swimmingly and we all had a ton of fun! After that it got to be time to venture home and get ready for institute.

YAY institute! I have so missed that for the last month or so. It is so uplifting to me. I really don't know what I would do if I had to go another week without the edification that it brings to my spirit. I love the Elmer's, they are such wonderful people and I thank God for putting them in my life as my institute teachers. I hope that I continue to keep them in my life long after they are called to serve God in another fashion.

After institute Garrett and I decided to go back to his place and watch The Princess Bride. He and his sister Cierra had never watched the whole move, and that had to be remedied. That is almost blasphemy seeing how the movie is 21 years old! (Older than either of them! haha) Though, I fear that I will pay for that decision tomorrow as I work at 9am, and it is now after 1am. Though, a commitment is a commitment and here I am typing away.

Doing this blog/journal has brought such wonderful peace to my soul, I cannot thank the Lord enough for inspiring me to do this.

Christ Lives

2009-01-14T23:19:00.002-06:00

2 Nephi 23:11

"And I will punish the world for evil, and the wicked for their iniquity; I will cause the arrogancy of the proud to cease, and will lay down the haughtiness of the terrible."

So, today was a very interesting day. I went to bed around when has become my usual bedtime (unfortunately) but was awoken far before my alarm was set to go off by a phone call (3:20am). I looked at the caller ID and it was my best friend, Stephen. So I quickly answered, and after talking to him briefly, could tell he was in a state of shock. Out of his privacy I won't go into details but I will suffice to say that he was in need of a friend, and I agreed to meet him at Waffle House shortly thereafter. I arrived first, and shortly thereafter was met by Stephen, Craig, and JB. So, we all sat at Waffle House, got breakfast.. and kept Stephen's mind off of what had happened. We were there for him, and that's exactly what he needed. I am glad that I have his friendship, he is very dear to me, I couldn't imagine a better friend than him. Stephen, I love you bud.

So, around 5am we figured it was a good time to leave, and we all went our separate ways.. mine led me straight back to my bed. I woke up around 11am (was planning on 10am.. but I was interrupted, so I slept in a little bit) in time to help my mom with some yard work. We worked til about noon raking up leaves and trimming down dead plants, getting ready for what we're expecting to be the winter freeze (maybe we shouldn't hold our breaths until around March eh?) So, I didn't get to go around the community talking to my neighbors, but I figured helping my own mother out around the house was a fine excuse. :)

Afterwards, I finally got done playing phone tag with Rachel, and we had a wonderful conversation, something that I hope we can do more often. She really is a special woman, one that I aspire to emulate (well.. in most ways.. I don't pull off "being a woman" very well so I've been told).

Then it came time to get ready to work, so I hurriedly threw on my uniform and made my 30 minute (without traffice) journey to Lake Worth.

My days seem to be more eventful than they have been in the recent past. Maybe that's because I don't consider "reading and/or playing rock band" to be anything noteworthy, or maybe it's because I am finding more fulfillment in what I spend my time doing nowadays. In trying to become more Christlike I am noticing things about me change for the better, and maybe that's what I am finding to be worthy of noting in my journal (er.. blog).

So, what has been on my mind for the better portion of the day has been a quote that I read on a dear friend of mine's blog (Garrett Roberts). The quote is of W. N. Taylor, and it reads:

"Temptation rarely comes in working hours. It is in their leisure time that men are made or marred."

That really got me thinking. I realized that when my mind is actively pursuing something, anything really, I am very rarely tempted to be doing something I shouldn't be doing. Even my thoughts seem to stay on the straight and narrow path when I am actively engaged in wholesome activities. For that is truly how we combat Satan and his pernicious lies. If we simply don't give him the time of day, he has no chance. If we are constantly engaged in righteous activities, and are honestly enjoying the work we are doing, then we had nowhere to go but down the path of righteousness that leads towards the Celestial Kingdom.

But what about those leisure hours that all men have, no matter how busy they are? Well, as Brother Taylor notes, that is when we are made or marred. It isn't difficult to keep your mind occupied with spiritual thoughts when you are keeping your body occupied with spiritual and uplifting activites. However, it is increasingly more difficult to make sure that your mind is occupied by only righteous thoughts when your leisure time rears its head. Hours spent mindlessly on the computer, infront of the tv, on a computer or video game, fishing, etc. It is during those hours that we come to a knowledge of who we truly are.

This links back to my short blog where I mentioned the need to be inner-driven. When you are inner-driven, you don't need to worry about leisure time because your thoughts will not differ from the times you are staying active. When you are inner-driven (at least inner-driven towards righteousness) your make up truly changed to that of Christ-like attributes. You become patient, long-suffering, charitable, honest, etc. You stand up for what is right because it becomes second nature to you. And (maybe most importatly of all) your thoughts do not stray from that which is good and holy. Your mind is constantly engaged in wholesome thoughts and it ponders on things that help your spirit and your body grow harmoniously.

If you, however, are not inner-driven, your thoughts tend to stray far and wide. You become a creature of your environment. Whatever you allow to cross the path of your neurons has a greater chance to draw your entire attention to it, whether you like it or not. If you lack the inner strength to become who you set out to be, then you will lack the inner strength to control what you let invade your mind and become what you dwell on. At least that has been my experience.

It's interesting to me that we truly can become whomever we truly desire to be. A year ago today, I was such a different person. I wanted to be a "ladies man" per se, I wanted to have wordly possession this and wordly possession that.. I wanted to be everything *I* could become without anyone's help. I didn't need anyone's direction in my life. I was me.

Today, I am a completely different person. I am putting others first, I am putting the Lord first in my life, I am following a routine that builds me both physically and spiritually (as well as mentally I've come to notice) in hopes that it will make me more Christ-like. And ever since I have been on this path, I have received more positive reinforcement and positive reactions to what my life has become than my "former life" ever acquired. I can't imagine my life being much better than it is right now, and I have my "inner-driven-towards-Christ self" to thank for that.

Christ is still working miracles to this day. I am living, breathing, walking proof of that.

My Service Adventure

2009-01-13T23:24:00.003-06:00

2 Nephi 22:2

"Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid; for the Lord JEHOVAH is my strength and my song; he also has become my salvation."

Well, today I took my own challenge that I discussed last night. As I was praying last night, an impression came over me to go out among my community and offer my service as an able bodies young man to help out where I could. So I took to the streets and went door knocking. It was hard to get myself out the door intially, but then I rememberd the words "I will trust, and not be afraid" followed by "Doubt not, fear not."

So I went to my neighbor's house first. I knocked once, twice, and then I saw her come to the window. However, all she did was peel back the curtains, look at me.. and then she walked away without so much as answering the door. (I thought to myself: I was wearing a hoodie! I didn't look like a missionary! haha.) Anyways, that discouraged me a little bit since my immediate neighbors were those who I want to extend my arm to the most. However, I took it as the source of a test and dedication, so to the next door I went. Doing this at 11am or so, I wasnt expecting too many people to be home, but since I work nights and due to the fact that I didn't want to go too early and catch people not awake, that's the time I chose. No one was home at the next few doors, but I arrived at a house that had people in it! A man answered the door, he seemed of Middle Eastern dissent..possibly Indian.. I'm bad with ethnicities haha, and his house smelled of curry.. it was wonderful! Anyways, I introduced myself and asked for his name. He replied that his name was Debaus (or however you spell it.. sounds like DeBoss haha). I told him why I had knocked on his door, that I was simply out and about meeting my neighbors and was wondering if there was any help around his house or whatever that I could help him out with. He couldn't think of anything at that very moment, but he did take my name and number in case anything came up. I thanked him for his time and went about my way.

Success!! Someone answered the door and was cordial! That gave me a little burst of energy and a bounce to my step.

So onward I went. The next person that answered the door was a lady named Sharon. (Apparently her last name is stamps as I saw a box addressed to "Dr Stamps" whom I can only assume to be her husband that she spoke of.) Anyways, she answered the door and I introduced myself to her. She said something along the lines of "oh wonderful! yes, I imagine that I would be able to use your help here and there, my husband is often at work when I need heavy things around the house lifted and such, however there is nothing right now I could use your help with." I was elated. We briefly got to know eachother. I learned that she has a daughter that is at LSU and is a junior. She seemed very eager to add in the comment that her daughter was there when LSU won the football championship. :) I left after a few minutes of chit chat and also left her with my name and number.

I couldn't believe people were receiving me so openly (when they actually answered the door! haha). It was a wonderful wonderful feeling!

The very next door was answered as well! It was a man named Mitch who seemed pleased to meet me. He also seemed eager to take down my information and mentioned needing help with "painting the entire exterior of the house, which needs to be done soon." I informed him that I would happily help him out with that, and added that I work nights, so any help would need to be in the morning. He seemed very happy to hear my response. Then he asked me something interesting. "So, you're looking for work? How much would you be looking for?" I quickly put 2 and 2 together and realized that people aren't used to service, and that most people have their own financial or personal benefit in mind when offering a helping hand. That saddened me briefly and I quickly corrected his thoughts by saying "oh I'm not looking for money out of this, I'm just out to help my neighbors and my community. I actually work full time at Chickfil-A, I simply don't have much to do in the morning and would love to help you out with anything I can during the day." (or something along those lines.) He seemed astounded at that prospect and eargerly wrote down my information.

That got me even more excited to meet more people!

Around the corner I went to meet some more neighbors. I met a man named Eric who works from home. He has a speech impediment which made conversation interesting, but he seemed to be a really nice guy, insisting that I not call him sir and use his name instead.

Further down the street I ran into a guy named Don. He seemed very capable of handling any "house work" that I may be offering to help with, but I asked nonetheless. He also was eager to write down my information and then offered a bit of advice to me. He mentioned that our neighborhood has a website that I could go onto and post information about what I was up to and that I might get more visibility that way. Though he added that he thought me going door to door was a wonderful way to go about my goals as well. I thanked him for the advice and told him I'd look into it. (I later pulled up the website and it turns out he's one of the officers on the neighborhood committee, interesting.)

As I left his house I noticed someone across the street working on a project involving saws and wood. So I ventured over to introduce myself and to see if I could help. His name is Roland, and he thanked me for my offer but informed me that what he was working on was pretty much a one-man job. I didnt pry but instead offered to leave him my information incase he wants my help with any future projects. He was more than willing to take down my information, but then he asked me that same question. "What kind of money are you looking for?" I chuckled and told him that all I was looking for was the chance to help out and be of service. He also seemed taken aback by my response, but didn't press the issue. Again, I felt elated.

I ventured back to Arbor Oak and decided to hit the other side. It was about noon at this point and I needed to get back home to get ready for work. There was a grandma that was home that answered the door. She didn't seem too interested in my service, however she mentioned that she knew my parents, but wasn't aware they had a boy my age. I told her that if she ever sees my car parked by our house (her house has a wonderful view of our house haha) that I am most likely home and that she is welcome to ask me for anything she may need help with. That seemed to satisfy her apparent desire for me to leave for whatever reason. And so I went about my way.

The final house that I went to was our across the street neighbors the Davenports. As I walked up their walkway they were apparently on their way out. "Hey there, how's it going?" They greeted me warmly and asked what I was up to. I told them that I was out and about, and since their children were grown (my age and older) and no longer around as often if at all, that I'd be willing to help them with anything they might need help with. They were completely shocked. And after I pre-empted their almost certain question about compensation, Bill's heart seemed to swell and he gave me a wonderful wonderful compliment. His reaction completely filled my heart as well. I really hope they take me up on my offer of service because they are such wonderful people. There is almost nothing they could ask me to do that I wouldn't be overjoyed to help them out with.

I then returned home to get ready for work and play the piano a little bit before I left. A day well spent! And it all took barely more than an hour! An hour! Really? That has to be one of my most fulfilling days in a long long time, and it took barely more than an hour!

I can't wait to get back out there tomorrow and meet more of my neighbors and extend a helping hand in my quest to become Christ-like.

2 Nephi 25:26